Prawn Chair

[ChristonaMoped]

My work have been absolute utter bastards - it's a long story but it was a horrible year ending with redundancy in December.

Would I be being unreasonable to insert frozen prawns into my bosses chair when I go and pick up my things? He won't be in - just our security fella who never comes up the stairs.

Our office is regularly over 40 degrees in the Summer.

I clicked on this expecting a new type of architecture and wondered how aesthetic a prawn chair was.

Don't do it.

Have you got a floor plan of the office?

I don't have a floor plan, it's a pretty famous building though, although my work place is not famous.

Prawn juice in the carpet is a good one, that could be done very stealthily.

Do worry about my colleagues getting caught in stench crossfire.

You up for stuffing yourself into some furnishings and going rotten please?

Sorry, OP. I'm really only any good for waggling my eyebrows and hurtling off backwards.

Some other poor sod will get the job of "dealing with it" though

Yes Yes to the prawns or even better anchovies plus milk which is always a good one.

There are live locusts you can buy as pet food. Just saying...

Oh, do live locusts breed quickly?

I spilled soya milk in the car recently, forgot about it and got in a few days later - fuck me, worst thing I've ever smelt. Accidental soya latte spillage.

Or a protein shake

Just send him a glitter bomb card...

You could do a Sharon Osborne and send him a gift wrapped turd in a box 🤮😱

You could do a Sharon Osborne and send him a gift wrapped turd in a box

He would definitely know it was me...

OMG what did he do?

Aside from the redundancy ovs

He will just make the cleaners sort it out. He won't do it himself so it won't really have any impact on him.

I left a tuna sandwich at an old job I just forgot about it 😉 ..,the fact I slid it under my managers drawer unit is another matter!

It will impact on him as he will be sitting in the stinking office...

Tis very outing but redundancy was such a blessing (it was much easier than going through the discrimination tribunal)

www.postabagofdicks.co.uk/product/anonymous-bag-of-dicks/

Send him a bag of dicks. You can even add penis confetti for an extra £1.

Tin tuna juice is your friend!

@Jalapinot

Turn the font white on a load of important documents and press save. It's a really easy fix but it will take them a while to work out what's happened

Haha! Love this!

Prawns have been purchased my lovelies... I have just added some extra liquid into the bag so I have more to play around with if need be.

I think I am going to decant the liquid into a water bottle to make it stealth...

Fantastic
I have been " bullied" for 20 years by a colleague
I may or may not have done something involving used loo roll and a mug.

I’m sorry OP that sounds rubbish. Hope you are ok and a new much better job comes your way soon.

The person that suggested locusts is wrong, what you want are cockroaches. Red runner or Dubbia. Red runners get EVERYWHERE and will tunnel under carpets and into ways and they are mega quick. Black crickets are god as they hide and make noises but only seem to make noises when you aren't expecting it and so it can take MONTHS to find the little bastards. Ah are available on a reptile live food supplier.