Prawn Chair

[ChristonaMoped]

My work have been absolute utter bastards - it's a long story but it was a horrible year ending with redundancy in December.

Would I be being unreasonable to insert frozen prawns into my bosses chair when I go and pick up my things? He won't be in - just our security fella who never comes up the stairs.

Our office is regularly over 40 degrees in the Summer.

@GreyhoundG1rl based on your past posts too, maybe unclench a little? Do you honestly think pp’s are serious? 🤦🏻‍♀️

@SeaTurtles92

Don't be so shellfish.

Ignore my earlier post. Glitter bomb.

I like the idea but dont do it , instead sign them up for loads of accounts advertising the mundane ( car insurance to the strange ( sex dungeons ) so he gets spammed , he will block them quickly so in a week or two set up a load more

Will you ever be requesting a reference from them? I think leave on best terms possible even if it been challenging.

No. It's puerile.

It's a date only reference, thankfully.

I quite like the toilet cistern idea... I really wouldn't put it past him to have put cameras up in the office!

Prawns in the curtain hems- you know, that last, long, wistful look out of the Big Man's office window...

The carrier bad full of shopping that happened to leak some milk! Oh dear!

And how the fuck did a fish get into the toilet cistern?

Puerile?... 🤔

Sometimes, needs must. 😂

So bring a fishy milkshake in with you, in a takeaway coffee cup. Find a pretext for going into bosses office (‘where o where did I put that stapler?’) for the cameras, then accidentally spill the milk onto multiple soft furnishings/carpet. Job done.

Not advocating it, but that’s how it plays out in my head. My head’s good at this stuff.

Turn the font white on a load of important documents and press save. It's a really easy fix but it will take them a while to work out what's happened

I unfortunately don't have IT access anymore...

Now I am wondering if there are actually cameras.

Wish there was a way for me to get into big boss's office too.

@PrawnofthePatriarchy

You called?

@ememem84

Ignore my earlier post. Glitter bomb.

Poor cleaners 🧹

I do like the idea of the glitter bomb too... it would really piss him off. He hates women / anything feminine.

@PrawnofthePatriarchy you up for stuffing yourself into some furnishings and going rotten please?

Glue EVERYTHING down. Paper, pens, computer mouse. Even the stuff in the drawers.

the paper dots or if you have a shredder that cuts paper up into small bits (rather than ribbon cutter ) collet them and put in his jacket hood or brolly , or desk draw

We don't have a shredder in the office.

So it's a toss up between posting prawns, fish in the cistern or glitter bomb deliveries.

Hire a mariachi band to follow him around for a day?

YwBU to deliberately place a prawn in his chair

However, let's say you just happen to be drinking a milky coffee, and eating a prawn sandwich in the chair. Who's to say one won't just slip down the side? A total accident of course, and as for the coffee you knocked over? These things happen. Not your fault

Google "dick loaded glitter bomb" I think this is exactly what you're looking for 😂

Glitter bomb definitely.

Rub his keyboard and mouse with chilli.

Dick Loaded Glitter Bomb is epic!

Unsure if his keyboard is in the office, that's a good one though...

I actually know someone who did this at an old job of mine, put prawns all round the office, down the back of the radiators and even in the ceiling, It was a stud one with foam tiles you could just pop out. It still stank after they thoroughly cleaned the place, they worked out she had put the 'juice' from the defrosted prawns in the carpet who thing had to be replaced!