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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Lockdown and domestic abuse

85 replies

SummerHouse · 03/11/2020 10:50

Sorry not an AIBU but, traffic…

From Thursday we all go into lockdown. Many places already have restrictions. But there is a vital exemption - you are able to leave your home to escape injury or harm. If you need to leave your home to protect yourself, the restrictions will not apply to you.

These restrictions are tough on most people but terrifying if they keep you trapped with an abuser and cut off from your usual escapes and support. I have found mumsnet to be a source of help in times of need so thought I would put together some links in case it helps someone somewhere.

I am thinking of you and feeling like a chocolate fireguard at the moment. But please let someone know if you are worried. Please have a look at the links below in case they might help.

Call the Police on 101 or 999 if it’s an emergency. If speaking would put you in danger, use the silent solution - you can call 999 and press “5 5” – this lets the police know you need help.

Here are details about having a Safety Plan

Safe Spaces are available in pharmacies including Boots, Superdrug and Morrisons and other independent pharmacies. Just go to the healthcare counter and ask for the safe space. There will be a phoneline and support available in a secure environment for you.

The National Domestic Violence Helpline is a 24hr Freephone available on 0808 2000 247 operating 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.

Galop is the national LGBT+ anti-violence charity. The number for them is 0800 999 5428.

The Men’s Advice Line is for male victims of domestic abuse and can be reached on 0808 8010327.

If you are the abuser, you can get help to change. Call the Respect helpline on 0808 802 4040

OP posts:
Koalaismyspiritanimal · 03/11/2020 23:05

Thanks @SummerHouse I'm good now

liky · 04/11/2020 18:37

Bump

SummerHouse · 05/11/2020 15:14

Shamelessly bumping my own post today as lockdown begins.

OP posts:
Itsallpointless · 05/11/2020 21:58

@SummerHouse that is such a kind and generous thought. I have lived in a toxic environment where I felt very trapped, I think I would definitely have made use of these resources, they weren't available back then sadly.

Well done for highlighting thisSmile

blueelephant91 · 07/11/2020 00:44

Bump

Mebeline · 07/11/2020 01:21

Bump. Can this be a sticky?

Itsallpointless · 07/11/2020 06:24

@Mebeline I think you'll find it already isSmile

Gilead · 07/11/2020 07:42

I’m a survivor. Thank you.💐💐💐

midgebabe · 07/11/2020 08:12

Bump

Cocothefirst · 07/11/2020 09:49

Bumping again

SummerHouse · 07/11/2020 13:09

I didn't mention in my OP about the domestic violence disclosure scheme

This is also known as Claire's Law. If you are worried that you or someone you know is at risk of domestic violence, you can ask your local police force under this scheme. They may be able to disclose information on the potential perpetrator to the person at risk.

Thank you beautiful people for the bumps. Flowers

OP posts:
NurseNancyandDoctorDavid · 07/11/2020 18:28

Bump

yellower2 · 08/11/2020 13:10

Is there a way to 'chat' to someone for help and advice about getting out of an emotionally abusive relationship online rather than on a phone speaking. I can't get chance to speak aloud privately with controlling husband and lockdown.

fuckrightoff · 08/11/2020 13:30

@yellower2 I believe women's aid now offer this service, either email or live chat Thanks

Furrydogmum · 08/11/2020 17:08

Thank you for posting this 💐 I work in a school and the thought of schools closing again for any longer than a "firebreak" is a real concern for this reason 😔

SummerHouse · 08/11/2020 19:58

www.nationaldahelpline.org.uk/Chat-to-us-online

@yellower2 the above link takes you to details of a live chat function on the national domestic helpline website. Live chat is available 2pm to 10pm Monday to Friday.

Or if you are able to go to a participating pharmacy (including lots of independent once but also Boots, Superdrug and Morrisons) they will provide you with a "safe space" and phone line.

Hope this helps. Sorry you are in this horrible situation.

OP posts:
SummerHouse · 08/11/2020 20:00

*sorry it's 3pm to 10pm that live chat is available.

OP posts:
SelenaSafari · 08/11/2020 20:02

Another bump

zaffa · 08/11/2020 20:18

Thank you OP - it's so important to get this message out

Idunnoyou · 08/11/2020 20:32
Flowers
shiningstar2 · 08/11/2020 20:45

Bump Flowers

Cryalot2 · 08/11/2020 22:21

Thank you for this .

Palaver1 · 09/11/2020 06:07

Thank you much needed .

PopsicleHustler · 09/11/2020 06:31

Bumpity bump

Awesome thread. Not just for lockdown but all the time. Get out ladies and get safe.

wishthiswasreallife · 09/11/2020 06:33

BUMP

This is such an important thread that needs to be kept at the top.

Well done Op Daffodil