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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU - full time teacher and two kids?

62 replies

JaneeceBryant · 14/02/2020 20:48

Part time at my current secondary school and have two kids, 6 and 3. Finding it hard work but very unhappy at my current place. A full time position has come up in a nearby secondary school, nearer to home and a really good opportunity. Am I stupid for even considering full time teaching and having two kids. Husband works long hours and no other support. HELP!

OP posts:
HomeMadeMadness · 14/02/2020 20:51

Hmmm what would you do on parents evenings or when you had to stay late for a meeting? Could you afford a nanny or au pair? People certainly do manage but I don't think I could personally.

TheDarkPassenger · 14/02/2020 20:52

Are you a single parent? My friend is a full time teacher and has kids, but her husband does pick ups etc.

Threeisme · 14/02/2020 20:53

If you're really organised and plan, it's definitely doable. I'd rather be happy full time than miserable part time.

Whynotnowbaby · 14/02/2020 20:53

I was in almost exactly the same situation as you (we moved abroad last year and conditions here are so much better for teachers). It is hard work but it is also doable. My dh works long hours too so it all came down to me to get kids ready and sort everything. My lifesaver was an excellent childminder - she took and collected dc1 from school and had dc2 full time (and would have done preschool run with him if I was still there). She was great because she was always willing to have them later on parents’ evenings and other events. If you don’t already have someone like that, I highly recommend finding someone, it makes you feel you have someone in your corner!

Curiosity101 · 14/02/2020 20:53

Surely full time as a teacher is actually easier than full time in other jobs? In the sense that (and hear me out here Grin) you're on holiday when the kids are on holiday? And lots of other couple both work full time and have small children.

Obviously I know how hard teachers work and I know you're not actually on holiday when the kids are on holiday, plus it'll probably mean a lot more hours at evenings and weekends during term time. But you have a lot more flexibility on when you do your work during the holidays I think?

I think it sounds like a great idea. It'll be tough, and you may need additional wrap around care but if the sums add up, your partner is on board and you'll enjoy it then why not!

flumposie · 14/02/2020 20:54

I am a secondary school teacher. I teach .6 over 4 days. I've been part time for the last ten years since having my daughter. There is no way I could consider going back full time. I am a single parent though. I just about cope as it is .

Haggisfish · 14/02/2020 20:54

I do it but have a great child minder and reliable family to share sick leave etc. I bloody love the holidays off with dc.

valentinefallout · 14/02/2020 20:55

I went to 4 days after previously doing 2 and it's far too much. I wasn't very keen on the school that I was doing 2 days a week in and left thinking supply would be better. It wasn't. I then really struggled to find part time as schools don't seem to want part timers. Eventually got 4 days but it's very difficult. I realise how stupid I was not to have stuck with my original school. The grass is not always greener.

ballsdeep · 14/02/2020 20:56

I'm a ft teacher with 3 kids! Go for it

shiningstar2 · 14/02/2020 21:02

Retired secondary teacher here and daughter also a full time teacher. I think you would be mad to leave a good pt position if you have young kids. They are like gold dust. You may feel as though you are almost working full time now for part time salary if you are marking, prepping ext on your days off but imagine having a full teaching workload on those days. You would have twice the marking, prepping ext and only the weekend to do it in. I've recently retired and thinking of my former colleagues, the only ones with their own kids enjoying the job were the part time teachers. The full time ones were, in the main, exhausted, burnt out and resentful.

Rosie2000 · 14/02/2020 21:03

I’m ft with 4 kids, single parent- not sure why people say you cannot do it, it’s possible because I do it week in week out- the question is do you want to??

Tombakersscarf · 14/02/2020 21:05

What's better about it other than it being nearer?

peanutbuttermarmite · 14/02/2020 21:07

Wouldn’t you be better off posting in staffroom? I found ft work easier but I’m not a teacher.

Original poster
JaneeceBryant · 14/02/2020 21:30

Thanks for all your replies. Post would probably be better elsewhere but I'm not au fait with all the different topic areas!

OP posts:
Original poster
JaneeceBryant · 14/02/2020 21:33

It's a great opportunity for future career progression and a much better school in terms of behaviour and results.

OP posts:
Original poster
JaneeceBryant · 14/02/2020 21:33

Parent's Evenings - husband finishes work early and sorts out the kids.

OP posts:
user1471539385 · 14/02/2020 21:39

Ft teacher here. It can work if you want it to. Babysitter for parents eve if DH not available, it’s fine. Full time is not a crime against your children. DD12 regularly say she is proud that I have a career and she wants to do the same. We have amazing school holidays, and some days in the week where I leave on the bell and we go to the cinema or swimming, or just xhill at home.

squiglet111 · 14/02/2020 21:40

I manage full time with two kids. 6 and nearly 2. Husband also works long hours so I do all of evening duties. He does drop son at breakfast club in mornings tho. It is hectic most of the time, but it's doable. The holidays make it worth it.

Alittlebitofthat · 14/02/2020 21:41

I’m a full time teacher, 2 kids and self employed husband who works ridiculous hours. When mine were v little nursery was a lifesaver, both mine now in a primary with after school club, if I’m going to be later due to parents afternoon my parents help out. It’s never been an issue for us me being full time, I start my marking/prep etc when the kids go to bed.

comfysocks8516 · 14/02/2020 21:45

I used to be part time (3days) but just went up to full time with two pre school kids. I actually find it easier being full time as I feel I’m not always chasing to catch up at work - but I did invest in a cleaner, and my parents help out with pick ups when I have parents evenings

switswoo81 · 14/02/2020 21:45

I'm a full time teacher, teach a split class and am also the Deputy Principal. Have a 5 and one year old.
I'm in Ireland so significantly less workload but my deputy principal role is tough.
I prioritise my afternoon with my kids and do work when they in bed. It is tough but I love my job.

mnahmnah · 14/02/2020 21:48

I went back to work as a full-time head of department after each of my DC, when they were 7 months. They’re 3 and 8 now. My husband works nights so I have to do bath and bed every night in the week by. Myself. Kids have to go to in-laws every time there’s a parents evening etc. But it all works fine. Just have to be organised. Full-time work equals full-time pay and pension contributions!

DelurkingAJ · 14/02/2020 22:00

DH is FT in a boarding school (so one day a week 7:30 am - 11pm and Saturday school). I work FT an hour away. We manage without any issues because we have excellent childcare in place (DM and DPIL are several hours away). DSs are nearly 4 and 7.

You will earn more so you spend some of that on making your life easier (cleaner and online shopping pass here).

haveuheard · 14/02/2020 22:01

I had choice of f/t or be a SAHM and decided not to go back to work. I wanted to be able to go to plays and assemblies and occasionally help on school trips (although that definitely feels like work!). But then it depends on the school/head and your subject as to how flexible they are I think. Logistically it didn't work for me either as I couldn't find any childcare that would start early enough.

I now do something much lower paid but that is term time, part time and very flexible incase children are sick etc.

myohmywhatawonderfulday · 14/02/2020 22:02

I did it for three years with a similar aged children. I did have an amazing childminder though.

After three years I did really have enough of being tired all the time and completely stressed but...for a little while the money was good.

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