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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to not let him play Fortnite?

60 replies

meanmummy1 · 05/04/2019 20:46

Okay so DS 7 (8 in June) has an Xbox in his bedroom. He's only allowed it for limited time and his room must be tidied and other bits (homework etc) have to be completed.

He has mostly Lego games, which I personally think are fun and age appropriate too....

At a class party this evening and all the other children in his class were on and on about Fortnite and how they all play together.
DS looked quite sad so I chatted to some other mums about it as I'm quite clueless when it comes to Xbox Live and my child's safety with joining.

They all seemed horrified I haven't let him play it. Said it must be a shame for him in school as their DC are all obsessed and he must miss out.
They said they all play together in a party or something and yes strangers can join in too?

Am I being clueless here or is this the case?

Anyway cue DS 7 hearing the conversation and the fact that all the mums seemed gob smacked and to be honest made me feel a little shitty for not letting him play, he's now sulking.. it's not fair, he always gets left out, etc, etc......

I remember my little brother used to get very upset when he was a child on his Xbox as some American boy was horrible to him on it.

I don't really want my child interacting with strangers over Xbox???

I know it is a 12 but Am I being too sensitive or is Fortnite safe and would you allow a 7 year old access to Xbox live?!

OP posts:
polarpig · 05/04/2019 20:48

I wouldn't let a 7 year old play Fortnite or access Xbox Live to be honest. We allow access for the teenagers here but it has to be in the main lounge and not in their bedrooms.

KnitterOfSocks · 05/04/2019 20:50

My 9yo isn't allowed Fortnite. He whines about it sometime but I've held firm and he's accepted it. I relented to let him play when he's a friends house, but that's like once a month. It won't be allowed in my house though.

olivesnutsandcheese · 05/04/2019 20:51

Stick to your guns. Fortnite has ruined my DSS14 life. It's very addictive and I can guarantee your 7yr old will be a total sh*t if he's allowed to play it. Its totally inappropriate for his age, the other mothers are idiots

LovingLola · 05/04/2019 20:52

Are you actually serious? Or is this a wind up ?

247mummsy · 05/04/2019 20:54

I have an almost 7 year old, I won’t let him play computer games and wouldn’t let him have an Xbox in his room at such a young age, he has an iPad and is happy watching YouTube for short periods at the weekends. But he does have an Xbox in his room at his dads house and is allowed to play fortnite, I don’t agree with this but nothing I can do when he’s at his dads. If you’re happy for him to play for a short while at weekends for example, why don’t you put the Xbox in the lounge and monitor him playing it? But also there’s something you can get on your phone to see who he’s playing with, my fiancé has this as he has an 11 year old son who plays this game in his room at weekends when he’s here, I’m not sure what it’s called though.

gt84 · 05/04/2019 20:55

Don’t do it.
My boys are 12 and 15 and they play it. My 12 year old is awful on it, it’s so addictive and he gets so angry every time his character dies. It’s more trouble than it’s worth as every time he gets angry he gets his access taken away. I wish I’d never let him play it in the first place.

SovietKitsch · 05/04/2019 20:55

7? No way. Year 7, fair enough

Sculpin · 05/04/2019 21:00

My DS1 had to wait till he was 13, but DS2 was only 9 (as it's hard to let one of them play but not the other). Neither have become addicted and they still play outside, with lego etc.

It is true that they all link up and play together so he may well be feeling left out. You have to supervise to make sure he's only playing with people he knows, not strangers.

HexagonalBattenburg · 05/04/2019 21:00

There are a fair few in my 7 year old's class who play it (or, more likely, go ON about playing it) - plus the entire flipping year group spend half their lives flossing like idiots... but I won't let mine play it. More than anything else she's shite at video games and would get really cross and grumpy straight away - she's more keen on the idea of playing it than actually playing it really.

Insomnibrat · 05/04/2019 21:02

I'd resist completely. All I've heard is what a complete nightmare it is and how much trouble it causes in so many different ways.

You're not being his friend here, you're parenting him.

Pinkprincess1978 · 05/04/2019 21:04

We let our son play at 10 and he got obsessed and was staying up all night playing. He ended up loosing his PS4 for 3 months last summer and when he got it back his dad figured out how to use the security on it so he now can't play after certain times and it will limit how long he play each day - plus it won't allow fortnight as it knows he is only 11 and you need to be 12 to play.

At first he found it really hard and his friends still play but I don't feel he has missed out. I wouldn't let a 7 year old play at all.

user1496259972 · 05/04/2019 21:06

Fortnite is a 12. My DS 8 is not allowed to play it. School gets really annoyed about parents letting them play it and have banned talk about it!! Ds grumbles sometimes about not being allowed it but he knows it’s out of the question.

Zebedee88 · 05/04/2019 21:09

We let the 7 year old play it, he decided after a little while that he didn't find it fun and that it was boring. Any game can become addictive, that's why tablets / Xbox is restricted. He didn't talk to anyone in the game either.

ChariotsofFish · 05/04/2019 21:15

I have a child the same age and there is no way he’s having fortnite. Among the games playing kids in his class some are really into fortnite and some minecraft. It is fairly obvious that fortnite is a much more negative influence.

BunchOfBalloons · 05/04/2019 21:18

I’m going to go against the grain here. My 2 DS (7 and 9) play Fortnite - but I play it with them. There is no addiction or tantrums over it - we play on an evening completing our challenges together once homework and reading etc are done. When times up then times up - they know the rules and not to push it else they miss out next time. They sometimes play with friends from school but the TV/pads are in our open plan kitchen/lounge and I am very insistant on no adding/accepting friend requests from people they do not know. It is also possible to block people and mute microphones.

Alwaysgrey · 05/04/2019 21:18

I’ve got a 10,9 and 7 year old. None of them play fortnite. They have iPads and mainly watch YouTube kids or play toca boca stuff. No chance are they linking up with anyone or playing fortnite.

HaudYerWheeshtYaWeeBellend · 05/04/2019 21:20

Depends on the child, is he mature enough to play the game, can he comprehend that’s it’s only a game and not real life etc... games are GUIDELINES, not law, know your child!!!

KaterinaPetrova · 05/04/2019 21:27

My 7 yo is allowed to play it but only does so in the living room and only with his school friends and sisters online. When I want him off it I just tell him "last game" and then it goes off. It's not difficult to limit things like that if you are strict about it from day one.

Tbh it's actually pretty boring. The kids seem to like it but I have no idea why. They can shoot each other but it's not violence like in Call of Duty or anything. It's waaaay milder than a good old Tom and Jerry cartoon anyway!

Pharlapwasthebest · 05/04/2019 21:33

YAANBU. It's a 12 and he shouldn't be playing it. He shouldn't have any his bedroom at all tbh, it needs to be somewhere you can keep an eye on what he's doing.
My boys aren't allowed to play it, and they are older than yours.

CookPassBabtridge · 05/04/2019 21:39

I was pleased the Fortnite craze would be over by the time my nearly 5 year old was of the age to play it, until I heard loads of the 6 yr olds at school are playing it Shock

HicDraconis · 05/04/2019 21:39

YANBU - your parenting, your rules. I have two boys (13 and 11) and neither of them are allowed to play fortnite. They play other games, but that one is banned.

It’s addictive (as are all video games, but fortnite was written specifically to be as addictive as possible), it’s linked to serious behavioural issues in teens and some of those “other mums” might regret their choice to allow it in future.

kaytee87 · 05/04/2019 21:46

Wow of course yanbu. Tbh I'm amazed your 7yo has an Xbox and tv in his bedroom. I'm probably clueless though.

BogstandardBelle · 05/04/2019 22:04

Huh? Is this whole thread a wind up? I have an 11yr old who plays Fortnite with his friends online. He stops and turns off when told to. He does all his homework, sports and reads actual books. It’s just a game - and quite a fun one too (though I th Apex is starting to take over). I’ll ofyen have a game against him, though he usually destroys me.

OP Fortnite isn’t the issue here. It’s the fact that yr 7yr old has an x-box in his bedroom and you are treating it like a board game. Bring it into the living room. Sit down and play a few games with him (try the Lego ones, they are fun too.) and when he’s in bed, fire up Xbox live and see how it works. Check out the parental controls and learn how to use them effectively. He will eat to play online and clearly his friends are already. So show him how to do it safely,

BogstandardBelle · 05/04/2019 22:05

Eat =want

Vulpine · 05/04/2019 22:10

I'd take the x box out of his bedroom

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