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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

School trip and 48 hour rule FFS

51 replies

raisinsinmysocks · 12/03/2019 11:50

Okay, just a rant. I know I'm not being unreasonable.

But my DS (6) has a school trip today. Another mum posted on the class WhatsApp asking what the rules were for phoning in sick as their child had been sick Sunday night and they wanted to keep them off 48 hours as per the rules.

People replied with the info and said sorry the child will miss said school trip.

Then the mum replied to say her child was really upset about missing the trip and they were going to send them in anyway as they'd only been sick once and fine since Sunday. She even apologised if anyone got sick!

AIBU to be really, really pissed off about this? It's just beyond selfish IMO.

OP posts:
Glitterblue · 12/03/2019 12:01

YANBU. one of the mums at DD's school tried to send her son back on the weds morning when he'd been sick at school on the Tues morning. She was adamant he was fine as it had only been once. School sent him away again as it wasn't even 24 hours. He was sick again later that morning and again that night so that just proves that the 48 hour rule is right. Hope your DC avoids it, it's massively unfair on the others.

Stopandlook · 12/03/2019 12:03

I don’t know.... I think her only mistake was asking about it to be honest. Depends if they genuinely are well now. I can understand not wanting to miss out.
Realise I am in minority but being truthful about how I’d feel in her shoes...

LeesPostersAreInFrames · 12/03/2019 12:05

Um, either tell her not to send the child or send a screenshot of the chat to a teacher (create a new anonymous email if you must). I suspect all the other mums are being very British and polite about it but somebody should speak out on behalf of preventing the other kids from getting sick, and that somebody should be you.

ZippyBungleandGeorge · 12/03/2019 12:07

Depends why he was sick. DN was sick at a birthday party recently, jelly and ice cream followed by tearing around like a loon and practising her gymnastics on the bouncy castle. Another child then gave her some fizzy drink which she doesn't have (she's not quite four) and she was a little bit sick. In those circumstances if they'd not been sick again in more than 24 hours I would still send them. Poorly, different matter.

GreenFingersWouldBeHandy · 12/03/2019 12:08

I think you should report it to the school. And tell her you're doing it. Everyone else will thank you.

JellycatElfie · 12/03/2019 12:10

Bleurgh what’s more grim than a tummy bug? I hate hate hate them with a passion.
I bet the majority of kids bugs picked up at school are spread through people not observing this rule.

BlueMerchant · 12/03/2019 12:11

I agree with pp who thinks her only mistake was asking about it.

SB1013 · 12/03/2019 12:15

Yep my son was sick after a party too. Only once and was definitely down to too much party food etc so I sent him to school the next day. He was absolutely fine. She shouldn't have told anyone

Original poster
raisinsinmysocks · 12/03/2019 12:16

Oh it was definitely a bug. Whole family had it apparently. By the time she announced to everyone that the child was going to school, they would have all been on the bus already so nothing any of us can do. I get that she felt sorry for her child missing out, but it's really not fair on the others. Sometimes you just have to suck it up. Recently my DS had some suspect poos one morning before school and an accident on the way in. He was fine, had eaten too many raisins. But to be 100% sure, as I know there are families with pregnant mums and newborns, I kept him off 48 hours. It was stressful (I work) and he was bouncing off the walls. He missed his swimming lesson too. But that's what you do when you're trying to be considerate.

So if we pick up a bug because of this I will be absolutely livid. Wish I was brave enough to report to school but pointless in any event as they would have left by the time the mum fessed up. Just so unfair on the others.

OP posts:
InglouriousBasterd · 12/03/2019 12:19

I don’t know...it’s 36 hours. Likely he would have puked again if he was going to at that point. DDs school says 24 hours 🤷🏻‍♀️ Having said that, I stick to the 48 hour guide personally.

InglouriousBasterd · 12/03/2019 12:20

Oh cross post. With a bug that had torn through the whole family - she should have stuck to 48 hours.

user1471426142 · 12/03/2019 12:25

I’ve recently seen how important the 48 hours is. My little one had been 40 hours clear of vomiting and then started throwing up really violently again. I was pretty sure she had recovered so had become complacent. Some of the bugs going round at the moment are really nasty.

Clarl · 12/03/2019 12:26

YANBU I hate when people don’t stick to 48 hours.

NormanChrist · 12/03/2019 12:28

People not observing the 48hr rule are beyond selfish.

Sick bugs go though classes so quickly, my child’s class had one and the teacher ended up off ill as well so they ended up with a supply teacher for a few days.

Just follow the rule, yes it’s inconvenient especially if they seem fine but that’s just part of having kids it’s not all instagram perfect, sometimes it a puke covered pain in the arse.

OP I’d call the school and tell them.

StarlightIntheNight · 12/03/2019 12:33

I would let the mom know my thoughts of how selfish she is being, knowingly sending her child to school with a bug. I hate it when parents do that. Yea I get people work, but when I was working and had a sick child, I stayed home. I would do what I could working from home....these bugs spread fast.

xyzandabc · 12/03/2019 12:35

When my ds was in year 1, age 6. They had a horrendous week of sickness going round. One day there were 25 children off sick or sent home out of 58, in total about 45 of them caught the bug. The head had to report it to environment health, look at what they'd all had for lunch from the school kitchen etc, nothing found there as sick ones had had a mixture of hot lunch and packed lunches.

All they could attribute the spread to was a school trip at the beginning of the outbreak where they had all been cooped up in a coach together for 2 hours and the nature of the trip where they had all been perhaps more hands on with each other than may have been in a classroom.

Ginormoustrawberry · 12/03/2019 12:38

The 48 rule isn’t just made up shit you know? Just because ‘your’ kid is only sick once doesn’t mean the next kid they pass it onto isn’t going to be violently ill for a few days. Common sense should dictate that the same bug can affect different people in different ways!

Directed at ANYONE who thinks they can argue against the 48 rule.

OP - YANBU

ScatteredMama82 · 12/03/2019 12:38

I can't believe people can be so selfish. I would be reporting it to the school.

Blameitonartemis · 12/03/2019 12:42

I work in a school, if she has phoned into school to say her child was actually sick the school should refuse to let the child back within the 48 hours. Trip or not. I have turned lots of parents and children away on the door before with apologies that our policy is 48 hours clear when the parent tries to bring them back the next day Hmm. Hopefully the school would do that.

Bobaboutwhat · 12/03/2019 12:43

It’s the parents who go against the 48 hour rule that are rewarded with a 100% attendance certificates for their children Angry
At my DS’s school they even get a metal “100%” badge they can wear on their uniform. Yes - well done for not getting ill, you should be rewarded for being so fit and healthy whilst the other kids who have been ill should be made to feel inferior!

lilabet2 · 12/03/2019 12:49

That's horrible of her. 48 hours is 48 hours from the last symptom (so if they were sick in the night on Sunday but had diarrhoea on Monday morning/afternoon then it's 48 hours from the diarrhoea ending). It should really be a 3 days to 1 week minimum rule in terms of Norovirus shed but schools and work places wouldn't work well with that rule.

People can shed Norovirus (which causes most stomach bugs) for over 3 weeks.

She should have observed the 48 hour rule and is incredibly selfish for not doing that.

beenhereages1 · 12/03/2019 12:49

I've known of children at our school being allowed back 24 hours after one bout of sickness- that's with the schools approval. I imagine their thought is if it was just one bout then it's unlikely to be a bug? I'm not sure myself

Mmmmbrekkie · 12/03/2019 12:51

More than 36 hours
One vomit

Wouldn’t bother me if someone sent in their child in this scenario in the slightest

lilabet2 · 12/03/2019 12:53

InglouriousBasterd Tue 12-Mar-19 12:19:02
I don’t know...it’s 36 hours. Likely he would have puked again if he was going to at that point. DDs school says 24 hours 🤷🏻‍♀️ Having said that, I stick to the 48 hour guide personally

It's not about whether the person will throw up again that necessitates the 48 hour rule- they might but likely won't. It's about the fact that they are still shedding the virus in their poo and it's on their possessions, clothes, hands and saliva for that long too- but most likely even longer.

lilabet2 · 12/03/2019 12:55

The fact that one person throws up once, does not mean that another person that catches the virus won't throw up 10 times and be ill for 3 days- it depends on the individual's immune system. Obviously it is a virus because the rest of the family have had it- in fact if someone at the child's house still has it, then it's even more likely they'll spread it to other kids.

It's spread from hand to mouth; the other kids don't need direct contact with the vomit.