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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To leave 14, 7 and 2 year old home alone?

68 replies

Gingerninj · 22/02/2019 17:17

I have a course from 5:00 pm to 9:30 next week on tuesday, stuggling to find anyone to look after DC but my oldest has suggested letting her babysit. I've left them to go to the shops before but not for this long. I think it would be different if it was the middle of the day on a saturday but with it being the evening on a school night she'll have to do bedtime. I'm thinking about just cancelling

OP posts:
PooleySpooley · 22/02/2019 17:18

How mature is she in dealing with the 2 yr old?

Kettleon80 · 22/02/2019 17:18

Personally I would not leave a two year old with anyone under the age of about 18

TipseyTorvey · 22/02/2019 17:18

Hmmm. 14 and 7 is one thing but a toddler.... I think I wouldn't. I know they did in the 70s but I suspect that's illegal these days. So sorry, but yes you may need to cancel.

DontTouchTheMoustache · 22/02/2019 17:19

If she is very responsible it should be fine, perhaps let the neighbours know in case she needs help in an emergancy?

KatharinaRosalie · 22/02/2019 17:19

Didn't we all used to babysit actual babies when we were 14? And it's own sibling, own home - I would.

PooleySpooley · 22/02/2019 17:20

It’s not illegal.

Dimsumlosesum · 22/02/2019 17:20

Depends on the 14 year old tbh

Kettleon80 · 22/02/2019 17:21

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Kettleon80 · 22/02/2019 17:21

Whoops wrong thread 🤣🤣 can that post be removed?

Dreamingofkfc · 22/02/2019 17:21

Not at that time.of night. Maybe if the toddler was in bed. Between 5-7 is a crazy time in our house though!

Justkeeprollingalong · 22/02/2019 17:21

You know your own children. If you are happy, it's fine. Obviously have your phone on and maybe alert a friend/neighbour too.

WorraLiberty · 22/02/2019 17:21

If she's confident enough to do it and you're happy for her to go ahead then why not?

Ask yourself what's the worst that can happen and make your decision from there.

bobstersmum · 22/02/2019 17:21

Definitely not. A 2 year old needs an adult to me in charge, I wouldn't think it would look great if there was an incident and they found a 14 year old in charge.

NoAngel1 · 22/02/2019 17:24

I think if you feel happy that your 14 year old is responsible and knows what to do then it will be fine. Keep your phone accessible so she can phone you if needed.

TipseyTorvey · 22/02/2019 17:25

How far away is the course? Are there neighbours they can go to in an emergency? I suppose I'm just a worrier but others are right it probably down to how mature your 14 is?

HighlightsandHeels · 22/02/2019 17:27

Yep I would.

Dontstepinthecowpat · 22/02/2019 17:28

Depends on the 14 year old. There are 14 year olds who have their own babies.

flitwit99 · 22/02/2019 17:28

It's a big ask for a 14 yr old to get a 2 yr old into bed and settled. I think probably no.
But having said that, would it be a major disaster if the 2 yr old was still awake at 9.30 for once? Probably not.
So if 14yo is willing to accept they might have a tired and cranky 2 yr old awake right up till 9.30pm then why not?

Will the 7 yr old go to bed when the older one says it's time or will they play up too since it's a sibling?

ShesABelter · 22/02/2019 17:30

I wouldn't be worried about the 2 and 14 year old. My 14 year old would most definitely be able to watch a two year old a couple of hours and get them to bed. It would be the 7 year old being naughty and misbehaving I'd be concerned about.. would they behave?

babycatcher411 · 22/02/2019 17:33

It would depend on the 14 year old, and their relationship with the 2 year old, but yes, most likely. How far away will you be and will you be easy for her to reach you?

I had my son at 15, so not much older, and yes it’s very different them being your own child, but I was 100% responsible all the time, this is only for a few hours.
Equally, by that point I’d been baby sitting my mums friends kids on the odd evening for pocket money for probably about the amount of time you talk about.

I’d probably make sure they’re all fed and watered before you go out so the 14 year old is only responsible for basic tasks.

Ithinkmycatisevil · 22/02/2019 17:38

My dd is a very responsible 14 year old. I'm still not sure if leave a 2 year old with her in the evening though.

I think that really it depends on a a lot of things. How mature your dd is. What she's like generally with her siblings. How far away your course is. If you feel the younger ones would listen to her. If you think she would be able to cope in an emergency. If there's a neighbour near by she could go to if some thing bad did happen.

They're your children and only you know the answers to these questions.

Original poster
Gingerninj · 22/02/2019 17:39

I think she won't have much trouble with DD2, she often helps me out but DS7 may not always be willing to listen to her but then again he might be good as gold so it's quite risky. The course is about 20 minutes away. At her age I often babysat my younger siblings, youngest would have been around 2 then and we were fine but I still worry

OP posts:
lyralalala · 22/02/2019 17:41

Totally depends on your kids. One of my 15yo regularly babysits younger children in the evening. Her most regular job is a 2yo and a 4yo.

However my other 15yo I struggle to leave alone, never mind with youngest.

So you can only go on your kids.

Surfingtheweb · 22/02/2019 17:41

She will be fine.

BlueMerchant · 22/02/2019 17:44

I would be worrying too much about them that I wouldn't be able to concentrate on the course. Is there not a friendly neighbour who you talk to who your daughter knows who could 'pop in' at some point. I'd feel happier knowing another adult was aware you weren't in and would be on hand if needed.

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