to be jealous of my nanny

[curiouscat]

Kind of embarrassed about this but here goes: I am starting to envy the good times my au pair has with my children. I know it's great that they like her, it lets me go to work etc.

BUT I sometimes wish I could have the free days she gets while kids are at school and I'm at the office. Coming home to find them in pyjamas hugging and cuddling her makes me feel horrible not happy for them all.

I know it's contradictory but surely I'm not the only one who has felt this?

I had a fleeting moment of jealousy once, when my mum and I had both been standing next to the chanding table, while DS1 was having his nappy changed. DS jumped to my mum, and for a split second, I was quite put out he hadnbt' jumped to me. Then realised it was my mum he was jumping to, and was fine with it. I've always wondered what I would have thought/felt if it had been a carer he had jumped, instead to, instead of me.

LOL

Mumsnet's not that bad - usually

Actually, VVS, I'm glad you think my boss was bonkers. I think she was. Her husband and DS's were fab though.

I can now see it's a real can of worms and am relieved I'm not the only one in this boat. Thanks for all your honesty. I don't want to start yet another working mum guilt trip, but my jealousy took me by surprise.

My mum was at home all the time so I haven't seen families close up where mum does go out to work. My dc's are 5,7 and 9 and I was at home 9 years so feel I've really given them a good start. But it's still hard not having the good times with them.

But I can honestly say I don't miss getting them dressed, cooking supper which gets spat out, stopping the fighting etc

I shall count my lucky stars and maybe negotiate for 4 days instead of 5 days in the office.