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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

I can't afford anymore!

64 replies

MiddleClassPerm · 15/09/2018 20:54

This is a wwyd as well as aibu.

I'm a lp with 3 dc's although my eldest is early 20's and working. DS is on his 2nd year of GCSE's and DD has just started hers. I work ft but I earn less than £18k.

So far since they went back to school I've paid:
£150 deposit school trip 1
£40 deposit school trip 2
£60 art
£25 HE
£10 maths
£5 Spanish
The odd £2/3 for lessons I can't even remember now.

I've just received the email for the school fund, £150 for the 2 of them. I didn't pay it last year as I had similar amounts to pay out and received about 10 'reminder' emails throughout the year. I'm dreading getting the same ones again this year and feel really bad about it. It's not compulsory but I still feel I should be paying.

Would you pay in my position, should I maybe contact the school and tell them I can't afford it, or just ignore the emails again this year?

Wwyd?

OP posts:

PurpleTigerLove · 15/09/2018 20:58

Contact the school and explain , they shouldn’t be putting pressure on you to make an optional contribution. My parents couldn t afford to pay mine.

Beargoesgrr · 15/09/2018 20:58

Sorry, what is the school fund?

woodwaj · 15/09/2018 20:58

You should speak to the school. It is likely they could help you subsidise some trips etc. That is a lot :(

RB68 · 15/09/2018 21:01

Just say no and contact them about not contacting you further - it just isn't affordable for you.

So Glad we don't have this shit at ours

OwlinaTree · 15/09/2018 21:02

£150 school fund?! Wtf?

TheFaerieQueene · 15/09/2018 21:03

Don’t pay.

It is fucking awful that they chased you last year as though they were calling in a debt. I would tell them in a very strongly worded email that you will not be hassled that way again!

Pibplob · 15/09/2018 21:06

Don’t pay. I wouldn’t be able to either. Mine are at primary so haven’t had this yet but i know secondary does it as my parents used to get asked but couldn’t afford to pay either. Not many people could afford it even not counting all the extras you’ve already paid for. Not many will pay it I’m sure.

FinallyHere · 15/09/2018 21:09

Don't pay

Tell 'em you won't be paying but not why

Create a directory and sweep all emails from that address into the new subdirectory ( set up an action or rule) Sorted.

shankaroon30 · 15/09/2018 21:10

£150 wow!! That's way too much. Don't pay if you can't afford.

OwlinaTree · 15/09/2018 21:13

I just paid £12 for extras for the year for 1 child. And it was strongly stressed that this was voluntary on the letter. School I work in doesn't ask for anything.

NailsNeedDoing · 15/09/2018 21:16

Don't pay. While I can understand why schools have had to resort to this, it's outrageous that they do, and you shouldn't have to feel bad about it.

I'd email back and say you can't afford it, but will consider making a contribution in the future if you are able to and they stop hassling you.

BeenThereDone · 15/09/2018 21:17

I had the same problem.. Free education my arse!! Money for lockers, money for journels, school trips, branded and expensive (80quid a pop) school jumpers, jackets, pe gear. Not to mention no book rental scheme.

Then the cf had the audacity to ask for 250 per child contribution to school fund.

I never paid it in full but gave what I could which wasn't much being a single parent. They would harrass with texts and letters but I ignored it, can't give what I don't have...

This is my first year free of the hassle and it's brill

nzeire · 15/09/2018 21:26

Don’t be offended when you get the reminder letters though, they go out to everyone.

hadenough · 15/09/2018 21:30

Don't pay.

Any reminder emails - junk them. And don't feel bad.

SausageOnAFork · 15/09/2018 21:30

School fund? They can do one.
Is it an acadamy?

Petalflowers · 15/09/2018 21:32

Wow, a lot of requests for money.

Girlsnightin · 15/09/2018 21:35

I'd write back and say youve already contrbuted and add the list in your OP and ask them not to contact you again about it. Just quote GDPR. No one understands it enough to question that!

Petronius16 · 15/09/2018 21:36

Ask how much teachers contribute, if Academy how much from shareholders/management.

TeenTimesTwo · 15/09/2018 21:38

School fund. £75 per child. Say 1000 children in the school, £75000. They are using this so as not to make their books balance. They should live within their means, even if it means cutting provision. Not making you feel you should pay it when you can't afford to. One request, OK, 2 possibly, repeated reminders definitely not.

Brandnewshit · 15/09/2018 21:41

Whats the school fund, ive never come across this?

SausageOnAFork · 15/09/2018 21:47

I guess people have seen this; www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/b0bk5q99/panorama-profits-before-pupils-the-academies-scandal

GiantPandaAttacks · 15/09/2018 21:48

They should live within their means, even if it means cutting provision.

That’s really fucking stupid. So no support for SEN children, getting rid of staff, turning off heating and lights, no support for children of single parents (like lunch money, uniform). All provisions at my school. Yes it’s shit to have to ask but schools are begging. Living within our means means not functioning. Bloody hell some people are really fucking idiotic. Just talk to the school and ignore the emails. They will have to be sent as there is no money for anything anymore.

AnoukSpirit · 15/09/2018 21:48

They should live within their means, even if it means cutting provision.

Yes, because it's just that black and white. "okey dokey, well we can't afford to keep our most experienced maths specialist, so off you go, your GCSE classes can teach themselves..."

Responsible, competent finance teams try to ensure they have the funds to meet the needs of the students within the school. On account of meeting those students' needs being their entire reason for existence.

Just because you've drunk the Tory party's austerity and cuts koolaid doesn't meant it's not still utter bollocks.

However, op, it's not you who should feel bad. It's understandable they would ask, but they shouldn't be chasing like that. You're not obligated.

TittyFahLaEtcetera · 15/09/2018 21:49

It's £25 for my DS. I'm also a lp and have paid out several hundred to get him kitted out for secondary school and an upcoming trip. As it's a voluntary thing I can pay any time in the year ive decided I will pay it when I can. They can chase all they want.

Perhaps pay for one DC when you are able if it makes you feel better? If you're like me and have no support from their father then tell the school you're paying your half. If they don't appreciate that they are heartless. There will be others - even two parent families - who don't pay. I'm findjng this with DS' school.

panamacanal · 15/09/2018 21:49

School funds are voluntary. They shouldn't be pressurising you. Is it a voluntary aided faith school? If so, the clue is in the word "voluntary". Don't pay if you can't afford it.

By the way, the school trips are voluntary too. If they're in school time then they can only request voluntary contributions. If they're out of school time then they don't need to go.

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