What the f is this?

[Fluffywuffyunicorn]

What is this that's just bitten me? Do I need to amputate my own foot? Burn the house down? Aibu?
Seriously thought, what is it? It hurt

*though

It doesn’t look friendly does it?!

Earwig?

Amputate your entire self, burn yourself on a pyre of well-seasoned hazel wood under a full moon on the summer solstice and then take what's left to A&E.

Isn’t it an earwig?

Isn't it one of those bugs from the film Starship Troopers? I fear there are a large number hiding under your house. Good luck, OP.

Looks like an earwig to me. Not harmful if so..

That's an creeping death beetle. It won't die if you stand on it. In fact that's what they want as they multiple on impact with a foot.

Firstly you need a blow torch. Throw it some cheese to distract it. They savour cheese. Then start up the torch and burn the house down.

Call 101 about your leg. You'll be infectious and need to be detained for between 50 - 90 weeks.

It certainly wasn't friendly! It has now had its own not so friendly introduction to my shoe!
I'v never seen anything like it before. I can only guess it's come in with dd's 'pet' caterpillars. thanks mil

A clegg

Keep it clean and put some antiseptic on it

Cross post. Shit, hope it doesn't multiple

Is it a scorpion? squints

Actually looking again it doesnt have wings so prob not a clegg, ignore me

Looks like a larvae. Ladybird maybe

Devil's coach horse?

Wasn't a Clegg or earwig

Some sort of ladybird larvae?

bugguide.net/node/view/675222

it's a Lacewing larva

Cool, who wouldn't want lace wings hatching out of their feet?

I love lacewings. So beautiful. Did you kill it op ? (Sad) they are harmless .

After extensive research I agree it is a lacewing larvae!

Looks like a lacewing larvae their bite does hurt.

It's a bug.

Soak your foot in Zoflora. Cures everything according to MN and your home will smell very naice too

Looks a little like a silverfish.