What the f is this?

[Fluffywuffyunicorn]

What is this that's just bitten me? Do I need to amputate my own foot? Burn the house down? Aibu?
Seriously thought, what is it? It hurt

Its one of those things that injects almost-hatched eggs into you as it bites; watch out for the skin itching is they multiply just beneath the surface!

centipede?

How can you be sure it was a bite? It might have laid eggs in you and in a few weeks time your skin will burst open to release hundreds of the little critters.

Dd will be happy if my foot turns into a bug hive! Me not so much. I will have to keep watch for lumps appearing. Which would be better for amputation, a blunt cleaver or a slightly sharper bread knife? I have a pizza wheel too

I did like the pp who referred to it being a Clegg, with an uppercase first letter. That's a kind of nasty insect that forms coalitions with the Tories, I believe? Not sure that it bites feet though.

You dont need to worry about amuptation, they will knaw it from the inside out!!

I did like the pp who referred to it being a Clegg, with an uppercase first letter. That's a kind of nasty insect that forms coalitions with the Tories

They are then followed by Mayflies.

Ladybird larvae look far more like alien species IMO

I love ladybird and lacewing larvae. They eat all the greenfly in my conservatory. Lucky you getting one for free. I usually have to pay for them

I'd put money on ladybird larvae.

Hawkie

Its one of those things that injects almost-hatched eggs into you as it bites; watch out for the skin itching is they multiply just beneath the surface!

Why do people post stuff like this? Someone asking for help might actually believe it. It's not funny; it's nasty and likely to cause untold worry. It's not immediately obvious that this is a joke.

It's not immediately obvious that this is a joke.

I took the OP's suggestions of amputating her own foot and burning the house down as indicating a certain light-heartedness, to be fair.