to see every 90th Birthday present as an omen?

[tararabumdeay]

MIL is very frail but sharp as a tack - she's also banned me so DH and DCs will be going to see her. They must not go empty handed. It's not my job (though I'll be paying for presents and fuel) but looking for ideas.

1928 Silver Sixpence on a chain - lovely but implications of time.

Garden Gnome (she can just about make it to her garden) has a spade in its hand!

Flowers, candles - Catholic symbolism.

No alcohol - medication. Food would be a waste.

A tree or plant - it's touch and go. Mainly go with every plant I touch. If I had a rock garden the rocks would die.

I wonder if you might be overthinking it? Flowers are lovely and my great aunt was very touched by the bouquets she received on her 90th. Helium balloons went down well too. Would an audio book be appropriate?

How come she has banned you?

Agree with PP, you're way overthinking this. Flowers always go down well, my gran died when she was 92 and loved nothing better than receiving a bouquet (plants were too much effort, but flowers were doable).
A quilt. A CD with music from the time she was young. A kettle for one/tea for one set. Family photo album or framed photo of the grandchildren. Coffee table type book on a subject she enjoys. Cosy nightgown...plenty of options, really.

That said, I wouldn't be going to much trouble if she's 'banned' you. Your DH can deal with it.

I'd avoid candles as they can be a fire hazard.

Why are you banned?

I bought grandmother a “Vintage 1928” shopping bag from amazon that I thought was quite stylish.

I’d let your DH sort it, as it’s his mum and you’re banned.

If you're "banned" then why are you arranging her birthday present? It's your DH's job surely?

Banned guests are not required to pay attention to birthday celebrations surely.

It's Mickey Mouse's 90th this year.

So you should be able to find Disney stuff for the DC to give her - I can't see how a cartoon mouse can be an omen.

Tell DH he needs to sort out a main present himself

You are banned? If so I wouldn't buy her a bloody thing!

I'd definitely let your DH sort it out if you're banned. Plus if you pick the present, you'll be the bad guy when it's (inevitably) wrong.

Just don't buy white lillies or include a headstone with the gnome and you'll be grand

Soft throw/rug. Cashmere if possible. Always welcomed. But banned?! Maybe a framed picture of you?

Im intrigued as to why you are banned. I agree flowers would be lovely

A monthly box from Hotel Chocolat, or a monthly box from Fitzbillies in Cambridge of their chelsea buns?

A magazine subscription perhaps?

Cashmere bedsocks from Pure?

Flowers from a son on a 90th birthday are a bit stingy. Let him sort her present out.

Your banned you need not think about gifts

Banned? Surely not your gift to sort then?

Thank you for all the replies. I'm pleased flowers will be ok - however if I leave it up to DH he's bound to buy white lilies. It wouldn't matter though; he can do no wrong. The reason I am banned is because no one ever is good enough for her PFB.

I'm not going as far as 'Hotel Chocolat' and she'd probably turn them sour with one look.

If it were up to me she'd get a new broomstick and a cauldron.

You do the Hotel Chocolat monthly box online. No need to move off the sofa!!!

I wouldn't buy the old hag anything.
Fuck that.

Why on earth are you doing the present buying when you're banned? Let DH sort it. If whatever he buys is wrong, so be it. MIL reaps what she sows.

It sounds like you've had a lucky escape. She sounds nasty.

A plot in the graveyard?