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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Please help me - posting for traffic

35 replies

namechangeblushes · 15/01/2018 22:37

NC for obvious reasons.

I discovered an unusual bump 'down there' today. It's about 3mm, it's yellow, it doesn't itch and there's only one. It's right down in the fourchette, just below my vaginal opening. I've been in a monogamous (I have been, anyway) relationship for the past five years. I'm terrified it's herpes, but have never even had so much as a cold sore, nor has DP.

It could be a Fordyce spot, or a sebaceous cyst, but I'm just absolutely terrified I've somehow got herpes. Can anyone who has herpes please please tell me what the other symptoms are? I can't get this out of my head, I'm obsessively checking my vag in the mirror every 30 mins to see if more have sprung up. I feel well in myself, no cold/flu symptoms or anything.

If it's herpes, can either of us have had the virus for >5 years? Or has he cheated? I'm absolutely beside myself

Need a hand hold if nothing else Sad

OP posts:
MaidOfStars · 15/01/2018 22:44

Right, calm down.

It could just be a spot.

MaidOfStars · 15/01/2018 22:45

I’m assuming you have health anxiety?

Original poster
namechangeblushes · 15/01/2018 22:47

It's not sore, I've tried having a squeeze and it's not behaving like a spot usually behaves.

I'm a nurse, I don't have health anxiety but I am very health conscious, especially downstairs!

OP posts:
Dinosaursdontgrowontrees · 15/01/2018 22:47

It's probably just a spot. I have had yellow spots down there in the past.

MaidOfStars · 15/01/2018 22:48

And sorry, what you asked for, a (hand).

It’s not herpes. There are much more obvious explanations. Sweat/pores/spotty, weird ingrown hair (I get the odd hair in the most unlikely places), a graze/scratch.

You will be fine.

Obviously, I would have tried to tweezer it by now.

Original poster
namechangeblushes · 15/01/2018 22:50

I couldn't take the tweezers to it! It's on the soft vestibular tissue rather than on the labia majora so I think I'd pass out Blush

OP posts:
MaidOfStars · 15/01/2018 22:52

Not even to just nick the tip of the spot and see if it IS a spot?

meandmytinfoilhat · 15/01/2018 22:53

It could just be a blocked sebaceous gland. They're white/yellow in colour and sometimes the lump has formed under the skin and comes out in a ball or it could be a bartholins cyst.

Have a bath with Epsom salts and have a good look at it in a mirror or get your DH to look at it.

Genital herpes doesn't usually present in the way that you have described. It's more of a cluster of lumps with other symptoms.

Original poster
namechangeblushes · 15/01/2018 22:53

Might pinch a needle from work tomorrow Blush

OP posts:
MaidOfStars · 15/01/2018 22:54

Sorry, I feel like I’m a freaky fetishist, telling a random woman to stick tweezers into her fanny Blush

If it helps, I get cold sores and the pain is pretty unique. That’s not to say unbearable or anything, but it’s a very distinct feeling, and very zinging. I don’t know if genital herpes is supposed to feel the same.

Original poster
namechangeblushes · 15/01/2018 22:55

I've been cheated on by a previous partner and infected with chlamydia hence the herpes paranoia, I'm not just a nutcase Blush

OP posts:
Areyoufree · 15/01/2018 22:55

Bartholian cyst?

Areyoufree · 15/01/2018 22:56

Oops - missed that that had already been suggested!

Original poster
namechangeblushes · 15/01/2018 22:56

Bloody hope it's not a Bartholin's cyst! My Nan had one, not sure if there's a hereditary link there or not

OP posts:
Allthewaves · 15/01/2018 22:57

Puncture with needle

mishfish · 15/01/2018 23:11

Trust me you’ll know if it’s herpes you will be so uncomfortable- particularly for a first break out.

Why don’t you get to a GUM clinic for a check anyway, they can only confirm it when testing an active breakout

If you’re worried, I had a tough 2 years of it (ex passed it to me whilst I was having chemotherapy as a teenager) and my 2 years were particular tough due to low immunity and I haven’t had an outbreak since.

dotdotdotmustdash · 15/01/2018 23:13

Exactly the right place for a Bartholin's cyst. If it gets infected or inflamed it will sting like a bugger but you won't die.

Original poster
namechangeblushes · 15/01/2018 23:16

I think I will pop along to the GUM clinic, I'm thinking of changing my contraception anyway so I might as well just put my mind at rest at the same time.

I've had no zingy pain (I've heard herpes described like that before) or tingling so I do know deep deep down that it's probably not herpes but the filthy cheating ex has unfortunately done his damage and made me fear the worst in everyone.

OP posts:
A580Hojas · 15/01/2018 23:17

Oh pull yourself together. Yabu.

mishfish · 15/01/2018 23:19

I’m not surprised. My ex infected his future ex wife and pretended he wasn’t aware he had it, went as far as going for a test and made out it was her that passed it to him. Vile creative. That’s not even the only other woman he’s done it to.

It tingles, it stings, they’re ulcer like spots, you’ll struggle to sit down properly, you’ll be feverish, it’s miserable.

ApproachingATunnel · 15/01/2018 23:21

I had similar, it was a bump of similar size, not painful but annoying. Then I popped it and it was just a spot and was gone forever. Don’t panicFlowers

Original poster
namechangeblushes · 15/01/2018 23:21

@A580Hojas

Oh, do elaborate on how I am BU? Hmm

OP posts:
Greensleeves · 15/01/2018 23:24

You're not being remotely unreasonable ignore the troll.

It sounds more like a sebacious cyst to me, maybe Bartholin's. Doesn't sound herpetic at all. Get it checked and put your mind at rest Flowers

TammySwansonTwo · 15/01/2018 23:24

If it were herpes, it would be extremely painful.

I've had random very sore patches that come up very rarely and I still don't know why. Been for tests twice, negative for herpes and everything else both times. It's a mystery!

Original poster
namechangeblushes · 15/01/2018 23:27

Gosh I've never looked at my own minge so many times hahaha, even took some hideous flash-on photos to zoom in on and scrutinise further Blush

OH THE GLAMOUR

OP posts:
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