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AIBU?

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Original poster

Parcel Etiquette

48 replies

Orangutango · 20/10/2017 16:53

Yesterday afternoon the Yodel man knocked and asked me to take a parcel for 'across the road'. I happily agreed as there is a small group of us who always take parcels for each other.

So as not to drip, about ten years ago I took a parcel for another neighbour across the road. By the time I'd sorted the kids out that evening etc they hadn't called to collect so I took it over about 7pm. The man was bloody vile to me, asking what on earth had taken me this long and he was waiting for it. I was a bit too dumbstruck to say anything at the time but vowed never to take a thing for them again.

Of course, when Yodel man went to push the card through he didn't go to nice neighbour opposite but twat neighbour.
Twat neighbour was home about 5pm last night as the car was outside. He didn't come for the parcel. 24 hours later it's still here and it's reasonably large.
DH says if he doesn't pick it up tomorrow he's putting it in the garage until he does.

AIBU not to take it over after the abuse last time?

OP posts:
Pixilicious · 20/10/2017 16:54

Absolutely you are right. You’re not a postman!

hidengosqueak · 20/10/2017 16:55

Nope, he knows where it is and he arranged for a delivery knowing he wouldn’t be there.
I take parcels for my neighbors but they came and collect from me and I would do the same.

ChickenJalfrezi · 20/10/2017 16:56

Just dump it on his doorstep (when he’s not there) surely?

sidesplittinglol · 20/10/2017 16:57

I wouldn't take it. It's his parcel, his responsibility. You're not a courier for him.

But ofc if he was a pleasant neighbour who appreciated your efforts then by all means take it over.

But he's not. He's a twat. Serves him right.

splendidisolation · 20/10/2017 16:58

Another vote for just dump on doorstep when his car is there. Ring doorbell and walk away

LemonySippet · 20/10/2017 16:59

I'm so glad you posted this as I have had the same question swirling around in my head - if someone takes in a parcel for me I go and collect it. Everyone else does the same, except for my twatty NDN who just ignores it until I see her and say "I have a parcel for you" and she feigns relief as though she thought I was going to steal it. Just come and ask for it woman!

I didn't know if me and all my other neighbours had got our etiquette wrong.

BriechonCheese · 20/10/2017 16:59

YANBU.
If he says anything say
"I know you won't remember but years ago I did a similar favour for you and you displayed unbelievable levels of rudeness. If I had known this parcel was for you, I would have immediately said no. FYI it is basic manners for the parcel owner to pick it up ASAP and not up to the person doing the favour to run errands for you. Now fuck off.

Put it in your garage, go out for the evening.

Original poster
Orangutango · 20/10/2017 17:06

I'm fairly certain he's waiting for me to take it across, that just makes me want to dig my heels in that bit more.

I could dump it outside his door, but don't want to get our Yodel guy into trouble as he's quite nice.

It can stay where it is for now, if it's not gone before lunch tomorrow it can go in the garage until he decides to come and fetch it, and then he can deal with DH.

OP posts:
bigbluebus · 20/10/2017 17:06

I always collect my parcels from neighbours as soon as I get home and see the card on the doormat. Neighbours also seem to do the same. Thankfully never have a problem any neighbours. You have laready done twat a favour by taking his parcel in for him so shouldn't have to put yourself out again by delivering it to him - especially not with the reception you got last time.

Assuming you know he has definitely had a card telling him where the parcel is, he doesn't have any disabilities which make it difficult for him to collect it and you have somewhere to store it so that it doesn't inconvenience you then I would wait for him to pick it up. Then if he is rude, tell him you won't be taking in any more parcels for him in future.

Santawontbelong · 20/10/2017 17:07

Have you got a ddog that could p up the side of the parcel??

Kintan · 20/10/2017 17:09

Don’t dump it on his doorstep whatever you do - if you’ve signed for it he could pretend he didn’t receive it and make out that you have stolen it if he is that much of an a-hole!

GeillisTheWitch · 20/10/2017 17:10

Do not take it over, let him come and get it, that's what any normal person does when the neighbour takes in a parcel. If he's going to be a wanker about it then its him that's missing out on his stuff, no skin off your nose.

Original poster
Orangutango · 20/10/2017 17:10

Funny you say that @Santawontbelong as Dog was having a good sniff at it. It says 'Leg Master' on the box.

He has no disabilities, other than general twattishness.

Oddly most of us (not him) were all at a funeral yesterday morning for a much loved neighbour and we'd joked the Yodel man wouldn't know what to do lol

OP posts:
sunandmoonshine · 20/10/2017 17:12

This is why, although I would help someone is an emergency, and do chat for 10 minutes to neighbours once or twice a week, I will never ever ever take parcels in for anyone. Nor do I want people taking them in for me. Too much hassle, and a bloody nuisance. For too many reasons to list.

I would not take the parcel to the neighbour if I were you, and would let it rot first.

sunandmoonshine · 20/10/2017 17:20

have you got a ddog?

A 'ddog?' Confused

Got a sticky letter 'd' ? Grin

Steeley113 · 20/10/2017 17:20

I only take in for certain neighbours after one took 3 days to collect their parcel and didn't answer the door whenever I went over. It was big and heavy too!

YellowFlower201 · 20/10/2017 17:22

I’d return to sender if not collected rather than keeping it.

Balibabe1 · 20/10/2017 17:26

Another voter to use “return to sender” option 😜.

sunandmoonshine · 20/10/2017 17:27

That's a good idea @YellowFlower201 Return to sender if he doesn't come for it. It's not your responsibility.

Slimthistime · 20/10/2017 17:30

OP it's not an excuse but I'm curious, did the man think you were the delivery person when he shouted at you?!

I would make a point not to take a parcel for him again.

sunandmoonshine · 20/10/2017 17:38

Hmmm good point. I wonder if the man could have thought you were the delivery person? Still no excuse to be an arse though.

MrTrebus · 20/10/2017 17:42

Wtf? Who doesn't get home,open door, see card, pick card up, go get parcel from neighbour, go home again. That's what everyone does surely?! That's what I did pre baby. Now I go in, see card, tell DH to go to number X on the way home to collect it.

IWantAPinkHouse · 20/10/2017 17:45

My parcels often get left with my neighbour but the lovely Royal Mail don't seem to feel the need to let me know by leaving me a card! I feel terrible when my neighbour has to bring it round because I don't know that it has arrived.

I'd keep his until he came for it, especially as you saw the card go through his door.

Skippii · 20/10/2017 17:49

Leg Master looks interesting :) Buy one for yourself and use it in the garage with the door open so he can see ... won't take him long to come over then.

woodhill · 20/10/2017 17:51

Wait for him to come for you

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