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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To be ticked off and contact the school

68 replies

SandyY2K · 09/10/2017 17:58

I'm rather ticked off with one of DDs teachers. She's in year 11 and has said this teacher is approachable.

I was going to try and speak with the year Head about it. Before I got a chance, it seems other students have felt the same and asked other teachers for support and clarity regarding a particular assessment.

Well the teacher somehow found out about this and has gone mad with the class. Mimicking their voices and telling them she's a good teacher, it's just them, they don't listen and previous pupils have achieved good results.

She has actually made them more reluctant to approach her after this. DD just feels there is no point in approaching her, but is now scared to approach the other teacher, in case teacher finds and gets annoyed again.

WIBU to have words about this with the school?

Her behaviour has been so unprofessional in my opinion.

OP posts:

MadMags · 09/10/2017 18:01

What?!

Sohurt17 · 09/10/2017 18:08

I don’t understand this either. What is the issue? That a teacher used to be approachable but now isn’t?

Pengggwn · 09/10/2017 18:10

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

somewheresomehow · 09/10/2017 18:13

I guess you mean un approachable and the kids are getting poor feedback with regard to their assignments
Try and have a meeting with the teacher and see if you can sort it out rather than rely on the kids messages

Original poster

SandyY2K · 09/10/2017 19:10

My error

She's in year 11 and has said this teacher is UNapproachable

OP posts:

shivermytimbers · 09/10/2017 19:13

I would avoid getting caught up in an 'all the other kids hate her too' scenario as it is quite possible that they are all winding each other up about the situation. Find out exactly what your daughter would like to speak to her about and try to facilitate that. Maybe a polite email outlining your daughter's problem could help?

Wolfiefan · 09/10/2017 19:19

What do they mean unapproachable? Does this teacher belittle them when they ask for help or do they just prefer someone else? The first? Follow complaints procedure. The second? Kids need to get over themselves!
The responsibility of the class remains that of the class teacher. It's not fair to expect other staff to step in. These teachers have their own classes and may not even teach this topic.

KittyVonCatsington · 09/10/2017 19:21

it seems other students have felt the same and asked other teachers for support and clarity regarding a particular assessment.

The problem may lie with how they went about it. It is so common for pupils to overstep the mark and moan at other teachers saying "such and such is rubbish", "such and such doesn't teach us anything" and "such and such hates us" in a sort of gang mentality.

Very rarely have I known pupils to genuinely and politely ask if another teacher can "clarify" an assessment and "support" them.

Therefore, it can be extremely frustrating for the teacher on the wrong end of this and in many ways, gives pupils a "get out of jail free card" to put in any effort themselves.

The teacher may well be right in referring to good past results and that the pupils should come to their class teacher. It depends on what the pupils said that warranted 'mimicking' to tell if that was within context or not.

Personally, I'd ignore what the 'class' thinks and focus only on your DD. If you want clarification on an assessment and extra support for your DD, by all means contact the teacher but I wouldn't refer to this incident in great detail and put it down to the first of many Year 11 hyperbolic wobbles.

Pengggwn · 09/10/2017 19:22

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster

SandyY2K · 09/10/2017 19:26

teacher belittle them when they ask for help

Yes she does. Makes them feel stupid and humiliated my DD said. She is sarcastic according to my DD.

The teacher doesn't explain things properly and when asked for clarity ... She gets a bit angry and her frustration becomes visible to the students.

So much so, that they find her unapproachable and see other teachers of the same subject.

As a number of students have done this ... it's gotten back to her and she's not happy.... which is her prerogative, but displaying her annoyance to the students and mimicking them is wrong IMO.

I'm undecided whether to raise it. I'm not going to speak to the actual teacher...as since posting this another mum called me ad her DD is having similar issues.

She spoke to the teacher last week and was met with defensiveness and it's put me off.

OP posts:

stonecircle · 09/10/2017 19:30

according to my DD.

There's a clue there. These situations are rarely relayed accurately by one's darling offspring (experience). Two sides and all that. Don't go in with all guns blazing.

KittyVonCatsington · 09/10/2017 19:35

OP,

Again, it depends on what the other parent actually said to the teacher as to whether the defensiveness is warranted or not. If they also went in with exactly what you have just updated, I'm not surprised the teacher was defensive.

If your DD genuinely has an issue with not understanding an assessment, ask the teacher to clarify the assessment for you. You don't need to mention other pupils/other parents to get a solution for your DD.

Out2pasture · 09/10/2017 19:37

I’d make an appointment to speak to the HM and see what your options are.

BoneyBackJefferson · 09/10/2017 19:37

I'm not going to speak to the actual teacher...as since posting this another mum called me ad her DD is having similar issues.

You really need to talk to the teacher.

It would seem that the pupils may be getting all their cards in a nice neat row.

Pengggwn · 09/10/2017 19:40

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Italiangreyhound · 09/10/2017 19:45

Sandy please speak to the teacher direct. Go in expecting her to be as nice as pie and very helpful. Remember you are two adults, professionals, and just expect the best.

If she is unpleasant or unapproachable or worse, take this up to the head of year or head teacher. I'd avoid the temptation to report back to other mums/dads unless the result is very bad, in which case you may wish to tell others, but generally may be better to just speak to her and see what happens.

Neither her being fabulous nor her being awful would surprise me, we are all human. But go in expecting the best.

PenelopeStoppit · 09/10/2017 19:47

I am surprised so many people are reluctant to believe a teacher can be difficult and unprofessional. I am a teacher and I have seen teachers act in the manner described from time to time. The year is young though and it is possible it might take some time for the students to get used to this new teacher and their teaching style. Parents complaining and students undermining by asking other teachers for support might not help. Give it a bit of time.

If the clarity is however around the new curriculum and students nagging for grade boundaries and past papers when they don't really exist yet and then going to other teachers to ask for information, after being told repeatedly it doesn't really exist, I can understand both the students' complaints and the teacher's complaints. Year 11 assessments are not altogether clear this year (and last in Eng/maths) due to the new curriculum. Students and parents need to be sympathetic with regards to this.

Pengggwn · 09/10/2017 19:50

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Wolfiefan · 09/10/2017 19:53

Doesn't explain things properly? Hmmm. If this is the case line manager will be involved.
Or the kids aren't listening, are messing about, prefer another teacher or are looking for a way out of knuckling down and doing the work?!
Asked for clarity? There's a massive difference between a student who needs a bit of extra support and a glassful whining they don't get it and running off to report how shit their teacher is.
I would stay out of what other students say. Talk to the teacher. Say you're concerned about your child and that you want to support them and ensure that they make maximum progress. Any issues? What can you do?
Don't rely on hearsay of other kids and parents. Really don't.

Fascinate · 09/10/2017 19:56

Only you know if your DD is being reasonable/truthful about this. My son had issues with a teacher in year 11, as did the rest of his class. No-one believed them until the entire class dropped down 3 grades on the paper that she taught compared to the paper the other subject teacher taught. Some of those kids failed the GCSE because of it.

I think most schools prefer you to contact the form teacher in the first case, then the year head, then the head teacher. Please DO go ahead and support your child in this.

Pengggwn · 09/10/2017 19:57

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BoneyBackJefferson · 09/10/2017 19:58

PenelopeStoppit

Another that isn't reluctant to believe it, but I am always surprised at how many posters would go above the head of the teacher when more often than not talking directly to the teacher will solve the issue.

KittyVonCatsington · 09/10/2017 20:05

I am surprised so many people are reluctant to believe a teacher can be difficult and unprofessional

Not reluctant at all. Everyone has said that contacting the teacher seems like a good idea, haven't they?

Getting all involved in class gossip inside and out of school, though, rarely ends up being helpful to anyone, due to the fact that unless you are there, the situation might not be as clear cut as first thought and can come dangerously close to the scenario in another thread, where the parents can end up harassing the teacher.

Original poster

SandyY2K · 09/10/2017 20:13

My DD is quite an able child. She's in top sets and isn't one to mess around in class.

I am surprised so many people are reluctant to believe a teacher can be difficult and unprofessional. I am a teacher and I have seen teachers act in the manner described from time to time

^^ Thank you

It would be nice to think that never happened.

I used to help out in the DCs school when in primary ... and when some teachers didn't realise I was around...they were quite sarcastic to pupils. They would have never said it if they knew I could hear.

I'm not one to go in guns a blazing. I'm very supportive of the school and teachers, especially being on the governing body ... But I do know that not every single teacher st the school is quite up to standard.

We discuss this with the HT and other SLT members at Governors meetings.

I'm certainly not over invested. Seems to be a term overused on MN. My point in saying "they" was to show my DD isn't the only one who feels that way. I won't mention other students if/when I call.

What the teacher fails to realise ( or maybe she does) is that her shouting, has made my DD even more reluctant to approach her ... which was the main complaint.

Maybe I'll have to use my Governor's hat as well. After all part of the reason we're there is to improve teaching and learning.

OP posts:

LewisThere · 09/10/2017 20:13

And what if teacher is actually unapproachable and takes it on the OP's dd?

I'm also uneasy about the idea that the dd can't be trusted. On any other subject, the OP would be told to believe her dd no matter what.

Plenty of students going in to grumble about the teacher might be them winding each other up. Or it can be that the teacher IS actually unapproachable and not good at all.
The reaction of the teacher to the incident makes think it's the latest.

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