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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Homework at weekend - AIBU?

36 replies

Mumkat37 · 23/09/2017 16:18

Hi all,
hope I can get your opinion on this as I just had a massive row Angry with DH over when DD should do her homework!?
He doesn't get involved to oversee that her homework gets done but he is of the option she should NOT do any homework at the weekends and just relax!!! ( DD & Myself often get edgy with each other over homework and it can upset the family piece)

I should probably point out DD never had very much home work until recently when she started year 6. (she never had a tutor but I had her signed up to an online math program)
DD gets her school homework on Fridays and it needs to be done and back in school the following Thursday morning.

This means she get her homework when the Weekend begins. If nothing is done Fri/sat/sun - then we have a massive rush to get things done on mon/tue/wed after school when she is tired and I really have a battle on my hands.

AIBU to think it would be a good idea to get majority out of the way using a bit of time when DD is relaxed Sat/Sun am??? Then she'd have more time relaxing Mon/Tues/Wed after school when she's tired??
BTW we are talking around 3 hrs homework a week - Appreciate your thoughts.
Thanks

OP posts:
OhOfCourse · 23/09/2017 16:23

Not at all are YBU. This is exactly what we do here as it’s just too manic to do homework during the week. In Y5 i got my son to start doing all his homework Saturday morning so then he felt like he had the whole weekend and week to himself.

Now he’s in y8 he does it this way all by himself 😊

Do what works for you both xx

Littlebelina · 23/09/2017 16:23

My DS has a lot less homework (yr 1) but same timelines as your DD. So far I'm trying to make sure it's done at weekends as a) it is out of way b) he is knackered after school (and attends wrap around care) so we were struggle to get in done during the week

So yanbu

jelliebelly · 23/09/2017 16:29

We use weekends much less stressful

moofolk · 23/09/2017 16:31

Three hours of homework seems like an awful lot. But YANBU, do whatever works. If you and DD clash over it,sounds like dad's turn to oversee it. Then he can work out when to do it.

ILoveMillhousesDad · 23/09/2017 16:32

Well my yr 4dd get homework on Friday and it has to be in Monday, so no choice really. 1 numeracy sheet, one handwriting sheet, a set of spellings and a set of timetables to learn through the week, which they are tested on the following friday, plus a reading book.

I think it is a bit mean, but It doesn't take long really.

I can see both sides.

BananaShit · 23/09/2017 16:34

Three hours is ridiculous for a Year 6 child. I'm not surprised it's causing issues. Have you discussed this with the school?

Nousernameforme · 23/09/2017 16:38

Set aside some time Saturday morning for her to do her homework if she doesn't do it then, when you are available to help, then she will have to ask her dad won't she. Or just not do it and get in trouble at school.

Harsh but I've been there with homework arguments and they are so frustrating. You spend more time convincing them to do it, then it actually takes

Nousernameforme · 23/09/2017 16:39

ahh hang on 3 hours didn't see that. That does seem an awful lot but probably still best to get it out of the way then if she does have any problems with it can speak to the teacher in the week.

Allthebestnamesareused · 23/09/2017 16:40

Doing it sooner rather than later will be a good habit to get into for when she goes up to senior school and will have 2 or 3 subjects a night sometimes due in the next day.

ASDsos · 23/09/2017 16:41

Our homework is set Monday to be In Fridays, Hmm ridiculous as they are so tired after school, not to mention those that do clubs or parents work.

YANBU

Booboobooboo84 · 23/09/2017 16:42

Does your dc have their own space to store and do homework. If so step back and let them learn to take responsibility for it themselves. They have to learn how to do it and this way they will learn possibly the hard way not to leave it to the last minute.

danadas · 23/09/2017 16:43

Tbh we don't really do homework when they are primary school age unless it fits in with what we have planned. We'd much rather be out at weekends than going toe to toe over homework.

ASDsos · 23/09/2017 16:45

Danadas - my Ds would be kept in playtime and lunch if he didn't do his homework.

Ttbb · 23/09/2017 16:48

That's s actually very little work. At her age I was expected todo two hours s day every day.

sharksDen · 23/09/2017 16:52

We have maths and literacy online (or app) homework to be completed weekly. Around 20 minutes of each. All other homework is set on a 4-weekly period giving children flexibility. The can do the bare minimum but the idea behind all homework is to inspire self-learning; taking the project as far as you want and in whatever direction.

There are no punishments for not doing it by we can usually tell which children do some at home and which don't.

The issue here is having it set for such short periods. Your H is correct; she needs down time. On the other hand, it's probably better to do a little work on a weekend day rather than tag it on to the end of a long day at school. It depends on your daughter, her and your schedule and what works best for you.

Neiother of you are being U.

RB68 · 23/09/2017 16:53

In yr six she needs to be gearing up for secondary school. Alot more each week and weekends will have to be used for some of it.

DH sounds like he doesn't like having to sort it out and rather than have any responsibility at the weekend or have it cut into what he wants to be doing is saying do it at another time.

Personally I would day make a start Friday(in case there is anything needed from shops etc) and finish Sun afternoon or eve and then if needed in the week. Its not fair to allow her to get edgy and anxious if she wants to do it sooner

pointythings · 23/09/2017 16:56

3 hours a week is a lot. It really is. I would do it over the weekend since it has to be done, but bloody hell that is loads for a 10yo. My DD1 has just started Yr 12 having done really brilliantly in her GCSEs and during Yr 10 and 11 was doing about 5 hours a week - and that not every week. So this is too much and smacks of SATs madness to me.

GhoulWithADragonTattoo · 23/09/2017 17:07

Yes I like getting it over on Sat as well (or Sunday morning if Sat too busy). Homework after school is a pain in the backside.

Original poster
Mumkat37 · 23/09/2017 17:11

Yes she is in Year 6 (10 Years old)
Home work from School is:
1x Creative task (aprox 1hour) (draw something and lable it etc)
1x comprehension task ( aprox 30 min) ( answering questions about a book they read)
1x English - online task ( 15 min)
1x Math online task ( 30 min)
So around 2hrs 15 min
But she's struggling a bit in math so I would like DD to do an extra
1 Hr on the math online program (equivalent of 1 hr math tutor)

Is it really too much??

OP posts:
RonSwansonsMoustache · 23/09/2017 17:16

I don't think three hours a week is too much at all. I was expected to do about an hour a day at her age (private primary school), and a minimum of 2 hours a night from year 7 onwards.

pizzaparty11 · 23/09/2017 17:18

..but hang on, the drawing doesn't need to take an hour!! she could knock that off in a few minutes!

elevenclips · 23/09/2017 17:19

It's not too much and I'd get it done sooner rather than later to avoid stress.

I've taught my dc to get work done when it's set and avoid procrastinating.

FluffyNinja · 23/09/2017 17:24

YANBU.
My DS is 8 yrs old and has about 30-45 mins of homework every evening Monday through to Friday. It's not difficult as he's writing out simple word spellings, sentences incorating the words and doing pretty easy maths but it's still time consuming.
Drives me nuts but it's easier if he gets on with it as soon as he gets home from school. He has only two after school activities a week so Monday we get it done, then tea, then activity and home by 8.30pm and bed by 9pm. Friday is early swimming so activity, followed by tea and the reading homework then the rest completed over the weekend.
I have no idea how parents manage who have several children and/or more activities to schedule in. Shock

ILoveMillhousesDad · 23/09/2017 18:21

That's s actually very little work. At her age I was expected todo two hours s day every day.

14 hours of homework a week when you were 10/11? Really?

d270r0 · 23/09/2017 18:27

Yes she should be doing it at the weekend. I think its best to get as much as possible done during the weekend to make the busyweek as easy as possible.

If she does not do her weekend homework once in secondary school she will probably start getting detentions.