ARGHHH!!!! To think I shouldn't be allowed out in public

[YesMadamDeputySpeaker]

I have had an extremely stressful day at work and have just got home after picking the DC up from my mum's. After much pestering, I took them to the shop to get a treat (TGIF).

There was a long queue and DC were messing about, fighting and squabbling amongst themselves. My 10 year old DS has just learnt to whistle and he was incessantly doing so whilst we waited - not so much an actual tune but just random noises.

It was grating on every one of my last nerves until I could bear it no more, so turned round and shouted "Will you just stop that bloody whistling now!" Only to find that the whistler in question was not DS, but a sweet little old man (he looked as though he was pushing 80) holding two close-to-overflowing shopping baskets.

I apologised profusely but an hour on and I'm still having a full-body cringe. Everyone in the shop turned to glare at me, and the cashier gave me an incredibly dirty look.

Why do these faux pas seem to happen to me on a daily basis? Particularly at work

Ahahahahahahaha Yanbu! But have some wine, it's Friday!

Whistling gets on my nerves too, OP. Worst sound ever.

Hahaha! Sorry, but that's just all too relatable. I'd have done the same.

That made me LOL

I was in an estate agents last weekend and the agent sat me down to discuss the listings they had. He walked off and called back 'have you had lunch?' I thought it was overly friendly but called back 'well know of haven't and I'm starving'.

Turned out he was asking his colleague.

*no I haven't!

I once grabbed hold of my DS's hand and hissed at him to stop messing about and wandering off only to find my DS quietly holding DH's hand and a very shocked little boy holding mine

Got a houseful of 7 kids atm (not all mine!) so will have to wait till DH gets home later tonight to crack the open..

2late2 and Button these are making me feel much better! Love it!

Geillis it's just awful, that and noisy eating - I can't handle family dinnertimes right now!

Oh my that made me nearly wet my pants!! :)
The sweet old chap will think twice before whistling his cheery tune next time :)

Funny, funny thread... I can relate to ALL of it.

I'm aware incidents like that at work aren't so funny, but at my previous job I walked into my boss' office and exclaimed about "fucking so-and-so (obviously I mentioned the real name) being absent again and leaving me in charge of" whatever it was I was in charge of.

Then another member of staff stepped out from behind the door and raised their eyebrows disapprovingly. The boss just lowered his head (secretly, I think he was laughing!).

emojiis all in the wrong order there... should be

littlebird oh don't, the apologetic look on his sweet little face will stay with me for all eternity now!

My mum once went up to some poor bloke she thought was my dad from the back and grumpily said "what are you looking at those for? You've got more than enough underpants". It obviously wasn't my dad and the poor stranger just sloped off looking worried.

YANBU!

I saw someone acting odd in the supermarket so took my (ex now but at the time) DH's arm, got in really close and starting whispering about it in his ear ... only to suddenly realise it wasn't my DH. Let out a rather loud but completely involuntary squeal. Everyone stopped to stare. You could just see them wondering what the poor man I had accosted had done to make me squeal so loud

Betty that's hilarious!!

These have got me howling! Definitely got me feeling a bit cheerier about my own faux pas now

Oh OP that's hilarious but I have sooo much sympathy - whistling is the most annoying sound. My FIL likes to whistle. Constantly. Tunelessly. Piercingly. And extremely fucking loudly. It honestly drives me to distraction!

My mum once came out of a shop and got into my dad's car. She looked at the driver, squealed "you're not my husband!!!" and ran out.

Dad was sitting in the car parked behind, in hysterics.

Mum's excuse - it was a red car. How was she to know!

Haha! Classic! I'm on the edge too and I've only got 3 to look after....wiiiiine is coming...

I did the exact same thing in the bank once, op. The old man's wife was next to him, and she almost wet herself laughing, then told me that she was always having a go at him for it, and he ignored her.

Whitelisbon perhaps your intervention was the kick up the backside that he needed to stop!

ChildishGambino I'm now down to 5 kids so wine time is growing ever nearer..

I was in Sainsburys and DS (5) was sort of hanging off me and getting underfoot. We got to the reduced section and he was still being a pain so I barked "Right, out of the way" in my best don't-fuck-with-me voice. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw an elderly gentleman jump about a foot backwards. I apologised profusely and explained, and he smiled and said "I just do as I'm told".