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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think this punishment was unfair?

39 replies

naemchaneg · 01/03/2017 19:29

DS (secondary school) overslept this morning and didn't have time for breakfast. I then got a call saying he'd got an after school detention (tomorrow) for eating sweets in class and I'd have to pick him up. We were actually going somewhere tomorrow, AIBU to think that an after school detention isn't fair? I'm not defending what he did, he shouldn't have been eating sweets but couldn't the school have done a lunchtime detention?

OP posts:
Original poster
naemchaneg · 01/03/2017 19:29

(pick him up after the detention I mean)

OP posts:
TheWorldAccordingToToads · 01/03/2017 19:29
Hmm
ThroughThickAndThin01 · 01/03/2017 19:31

Of course it's not unfair.

pleasecomesoonspring · 01/03/2017 19:32

He should be able to do what he wants! Human rights!
Eat sweets, drink energy drinks, have a nap if he's tired.

TheWorldAccordingToToads · 01/03/2017 19:33
Grin
Moanyoldcow · 01/03/2017 19:33

I work at a school and we wouldn't give an after school detention for something like this. It seems harsh if there are no other surrounding circumstances (rudeness, repeat offence etc).

We'd give a warning and if it wasn't heeded a lunchtime detention. After school detentions are for more serious infractions.

Gowgirl · 01/03/2017 19:34

How late do you have to sleep not to have time for a bowl of cereal Hmm

SEsofty · 01/03/2017 19:34

What is it this evening with people questioning teachers perfectly reasonable punishment.

It's a punishment. In a way it's good that you had something arranged tomorrow that he will have to miss as will hopefully never do it again.

FrogsLegs31 · 01/03/2017 19:35

Lol!
It was not the schools fault that he overslept.
The school rules will obviously forbid eating during lessons so the teacher can and has issued an appropriate sanction for that.

BlackCatSmushyFace · 01/03/2017 19:36

So a teacher should miss their lunchtime (probably spent doing prep or meeting or other important jobs. God forbid they should eat or pee) which my well be their only break of the day because your son can't organise his time and felt his needs were more important. Why is your son missing breakfast a good enough reason to deprive someone who already works hard of a break?? Seriously? Give your head a wobble and tell your kid off.

Deadsouls · 01/03/2017 19:36

Seems like a stupid reason for a detention. I'm sure loads of kids eat surreptitiously but unfortunately yours got caught.

PigletWasPoohsFriend · 01/03/2017 19:37

but couldn't the school have done a lunchtime detention?

Why should a teacher give up their lunchtime.

ChicRock · 01/03/2017 19:38

Maybe the teachers are "actually going somewhere" at lunchtime.

OvertiredandConfused · 01/03/2017 19:57

At our school, parents are able to request a detention be delayed until the next scheduled detention. They can only do this once. The policy was put in place to recognise that the sanction has wider implications and that, sometimes, arrangements can't always be changed.

They are very aware of repeat offenders and these are dealt with appropriately!

AcrossthePond55 · 01/03/2017 20:03

It's the school's decision and as long as it's not overly harsh in nature then the parents need to just deal with it. Punishments aren't meant to 'fit in' with the parent's schedule. I doubt very much that teachers enjoy after school detention, either. Unless you're 'going somewhere' is a medical appointment or such, then the punishment comes first.

BTW, I had two teenage chronic late-sleepers. For those days when they just couldn't get it together I kept a good supply of breakfast bars and canned Instant Breakfast on hand to give them as they went out the door. Not the best, but something fast and easy to eat on the go.

TheFairyCaravan · 01/03/2017 20:03

Detentions, or punishments for that matter, aren't meant to be fair.

HackAttack · 01/03/2017 20:07

Yabu, ffs

harderandharder2breathe · 01/03/2017 20:09

Yabu

If your son has your attitude I'm not surprised it's after school detention

Jayfee · 01/03/2017 20:11

oh i wish parents could spend a few weeks in a teacher's shoes...

melj1213 · 01/03/2017 20:14

Even if he slept in could he have not had something on the way to school? There's no excuse for eating sweets in class - when did he get them? If he had time to put some sweets in his pocket he had time to grab an apple for the school run.

Some days I sleep in or just lose track of time in the mornings so don't have time for a proper breakfast ... I still usually manage to grab some fruit or something on the way out, and if I can't even manage that I always have a stash of granola/cereal bars in the car and my locker at work just for this reason

Userone1 · 01/03/2017 20:16

Why would you have to pick him up?

HarryPottersMagicWand · 01/03/2017 20:17

Why is this the 3rd thread I've read on here in about the last 20 minutes about unfair punishments from a school. I'd AS the OPs but I really cba. It's definitely odd though.

HighwayDragon1 · 01/03/2017 20:19

At our school you'd get a lunchtime DT for that, if you missed your lunchtime DT then an afterschool is issued.

TalkingofMichaelAngel0 · 01/03/2017 20:22

I imagine being late to school would get a lunch dt and then breaking a school rule that same morning would escalate it to an after school Dt. Maybe parent get him an alarm and talk to him about sweets not being appropriate breakfast.

Trifleorbust · 01/03/2017 21:05

You don't get to schedule detention at a time to suit yourself.

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