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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To think my MIL is an idiot!

52 replies

Givemecakeplease · 23/02/2017 10:43

I'm breastfeeding DC2, I also breastfed DC1. MIL said to me the other day:

"One thing that looks terrible is when you see a lady with a big chest breastfeeding a little baby. It just looks wrong."

Honestly cannot cope with this woman.

OP posts:

Wishiwasmoiradingle2017 · 23/02/2017 10:45

If she is referring to you then tell her to stop visiting. . .

Allthewaves · 23/02/2017 10:46

Laugh loudly and say 'your so funny' in a tinkly voice

LilacSpatula · 23/02/2017 10:47

I'd adopt the grey rock approach and say, "Hmmm." Then change the subject.

Original poster

Givemecakeplease · 23/02/2017 10:48

She's not referring to me, I'm not blessed in that department but her views in general are just awful makes me so mad.

OP posts:

ShowMePotatoSalad · 23/02/2017 10:48

My MIL told me that her other DIL had stopped breastfeeding her children at 4 months so o should have done that too.

She told me breastfeeding my then 5 month old DS was "spoiling" him and how he didn't have a routine because he wasn't bottle fed (which wasn't true at all).

OpalFruitsMarathonsandSpira · 23/02/2017 10:49

Arse hole! They have verbal diarrhoea sometimes. I doubt it comes from a bad place per se.

My top tip is to ask her to repeat what she has said. "Sorry, what was that?" Then reply with an, "oh right ".

Really reduced these occurrences in my own experience!

Rugbyplayersarehot · 23/02/2017 10:49

How wierd of you mil maybe you need help? Tell her that

Rugbyplayersarehot · 23/02/2017 10:51

opa they gave verbal diarrhoea sometimes er really hope you arnt daft enough to tar all us mils with one brush

OpalFruitsMarathonsandSpira · 23/02/2017 10:53

Daft enough to make a sweeping generalisation on an internet forum.

Did you just answer your own question?

OpalFruitsMarathonsandSpira · 23/02/2017 10:54

Sorry that was unkind. My experience of mils is that they are full of good intentions but just get it so wrong so often. I do not know if that is you or not.

IWantATardis · 23/02/2017 10:55

That's a stupid thing to say.

I don't think I'd know where to start with that.

Reow · 23/02/2017 10:58

She sounds like an utter wanker.

BevGoldbergsSister · 23/02/2017 11:00

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ExitStage · 23/02/2017 11:04

Perhaps she was trying to be humorous? Admittedly she's not up there with Jasper Carrott!

ohfourfoxache · 23/02/2017 11:05

Stupid fuckwit.

Just ignore as much as you possibly can.

She'd have had a fit at me- 38GG and ds was 5lbs 11

Birdsgottaf1y · 23/02/2017 11:05

I would have answered that it's a shame we allowed the sexualisation of Wonen to get in the way of Mothering.

I take it she's sexist? I'd challenge her thinking. Watch the television series that looks at how things were in the 70's, attitudes were so ingrained and if you don't have anyone challenging that, it doesn't change.

ohfourfoxache · 23/02/2017 11:05

@ Exit

Original poster

Givemecakeplease · 23/02/2017 11:07

Definitely not trying to be funny. It was 100% serious. Every time she sees me she asks if I'm still breastfeeding. It's literally one of her 1st questions every time. I'm sure it's in the hope I'll stop. Actually, I'm positive that's why.

OP posts:

Original poster

Givemecakeplease · 23/02/2017 11:09

She's definitely sexist. She recently gave me a book about good house keeping. I was livid. Once DH put a washload on when his parents were here and they made a big fuss about him being "under the thumb"

OP posts:

pipsqueak25 · 23/02/2017 11:09

i've had a friendly and nice mil, a nice but favoured other dil's dc mil, a complete bitch mil and currently love her like my dm mil. so can identify with with most types on mn .
i think most mean well but get it wrong due to generational, different culture etc, some are just bat shit and others, well, like anyone else in life mouth is open before brain is in gear.
maybe we should adopt mrs browns' stance "that's nice," i.e "feck off" attiutude

LRDtheFeministDragon · 23/02/2017 11:13

Oh, I've heard this before. There's a (bizarre!) belief amongst some people that big breasts could 'smother' a tiny baby.

I suppose there's a tiny sliver of hope that she means something quasi-medical like that, rather than aesthetic?!

Rugbyplayersarehot · 23/02/2017 11:15

opa no not me I think as adore both my dils and we are all close.

My mil was ace too but my one dils mum sounds just like ops mil.

I mean why would anyone say something so clearly daft.

I don't think 70s attitudes are an excuse either. I was a child in the 70s and things move on.

Shes an idiot and there's plenty of those both sexes and all ages.

Laughing at the 'good housekeeping book' sorry op.

Rugbyplayersarehot · 23/02/2017 11:18

opa no worries we all shaped by our experiences and my personal favourite here was the mil who turned up to her sons wedding in a white dress, flowers and cried.

OpalFruitsMarathonsandSpira · 23/02/2017 11:22

turned up to her sons wedding in a white dress

Rugbyplayersarehot · 23/02/2017 11:27

I know imagine being a guest at that wedding.

Op she sounds jealous to be honest and maybe waiting to jump in to bottle feed.

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