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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

AIBU to ask about pocket money...

54 replies

QueenArnica · 15/02/2017 17:11

Hi posting for traffic really...
I currently give dd (13) £10 per month and ds (10) £5 per month pocket money.

They have to do jobs (make beds, empty and load dishwasher, sort recycling and laundry and dd brings me tea in bed every morning )
although I've never taken money away for not doing things)

Dd in particular is starting to spread her wings and go shopping with her friends. I tend to buy her essentials (toiletries and clothes included) and she uses her money to buy extras such as more clothes and toiletries!!

Her friends all get about £25 per month and I just want to see what the average is. She hasn't asked for more but I think maybe I'm being a bit tight.

So question is how much do you give your kids as pocket money? Thanks in advance

OP posts:

KingJoffreysRestingCuntface · 15/02/2017 17:14

DS(13) gets £20 a week but has to buy his school lunches from that too.

petitdonkey · 15/02/2017 17:16

Hi Queen - I was thinking about posting a similar question soon so will read the replies with interest, DS is nearly 13 and I have started to think he should have more.

I have always done age -2 so DS currently gets £10per month, DD 10 gets £8 and DD7 gets £5. It is not in any way related to chores and is never withheld (gets paid into their banks that they have free access to). I expect chores around the house but they are 'unpaid' if that makes sense, just part of being in the family.

I know some of DS's friends get more but he also has his mobile bill paid, Xbox live account and £3 per week in cash for the school coffee shop. He hasn't asked for more but I see it coming soon especially as he will start at a new school in September which is in a city.

I'm very interested to see what other people give.

NancyDonahue · 15/02/2017 17:17

Maybe you could up it to £25 on condition that she buys her own toiletries (minus sanitary stuff).

NapQueen · 15/02/2017 17:18

If your dd wants to go to the cinema then that will be literally all she can do that month!

velocitygir1 · 15/02/2017 17:21

I don't do pocket money anymore...just give as they ask/need but they don't take the piss with it.
Dd 12 has kerrang mag subscription at £7.50pm, mobile £20 pm and then stuff as she asks needs...tbf she doesn't ever do much so doesn't ask for stuff.
Ds 10 has Xbox live, ea live, mobile and Fifa points or roblox money lol!!! So that's more than my dd.

I tried pocket money but it just got spent instantly or built up and they never wanted anything.

Mari50 · 15/02/2017 17:24

Dd(8) gets £5 a week.

Katedotness1963 · 15/02/2017 17:25

When mine were 13 they got £60 a month.

HerRoyalNotness · 15/02/2017 17:27

I do it per year of age per week. So 9yo gets $9 per week and 6yo gets $6 per week.
St the moment 9yo can earn and extra $5 a month emptying the leaves from pool vacuum. Otherwise I just expect them to pick up after themselves and do the odd job I ask as a matter of course.

Trifleorbust · 15/02/2017 17:28

£10 a month is £2.50 a week or less, isn't it? With respect (because you can afford what you can afford) I got that in the early 90's when I was 10! It will not go far.

gabsdot · 15/02/2017 17:29

My 13 year old gets E110 per month. Out of that he has to pay for his own bus fares, lunches, Sports subs and his social life. We just started this system in January this year and it's working pretty well so far. He has an ATM card and because he often forgets to withdraw money he has spent a lot less money that he usually would. Also he's not coming to me looking for cash all the time. Whatever's left at the end of the month gets saved.
It's not dependant on him doing jobs in the house BTW. I feel everyone should do chores based on the fact that they live in the house and not to get paid.

May50 · 15/02/2017 17:30

Both DC (teens) get £10 a month. But both have phone contracts I pay on top, plus £20 a week for school lunches and snacks, plus if they were going somewhere specific like cinema trip I would probably pay for that too as expensive. So the £10 a month just for extras.

bimbobaggins · 15/02/2017 17:31

Agree with truffle, 2.50 per week for a 13 year old isn't very much. My 13 yo gets £20 per week from grandparents. He pays towards his own phone. Is careful with his money and saves too

May50 · 15/02/2017 17:32

I also buy all clothes, shoes, toiletries etc.

lifetothefull · 15/02/2017 17:39

13 yo gets £5 per week pocket money plus £25 per month for clothes. I feel like it's not a lot for her. 16 yo gets the same and it's more than enough!

pishedoff · 15/02/2017 17:46

We generally say that DS1(13) gets £10 a fortnight ( the weekend he's not at his dads) and DS2 (8) gets £5 a fortnight.

It can vary abit, DS1 doesn't ask for much so when he does I'll give him what he needs - so for instance if he's going into town with friends I'll fund enough for lunch and a couple of treats

user1484394242 · 15/02/2017 18:01

DD16 gets £25 a month (it goes up 50p per birthday) but £5 goes straight into savings and £5 to us for laptop (she borrowed money from us because she didn't have quite enough and needed it for GCSEs)

She also gets a £40 a month clothing allowance- 2 years ago we started this because she was constantly 'growing out of' or deciding she didn't like clothes after one wear. We worked out what clothing she needed over 12 months (not including school clothes/shoes, underwear...) and spread it over the year. She can spend or save (currently saving for summer holidays). Her clothes shopping is much more sensible now. The allowance covers enough for 1 pair shoes, 1 pair boots and a coat. If she wants extra shoes and has no coat, that's her choice.

For camp/school trips we pay for the trip itself if we can afford it but she pays for spending/pocket money, any clothes and extras she needs or wants to take with. Last trip she wanted a new suitcase. As soon as I reminded her that she has an allowance for that, last years suitcase was suddenly perfect.

If she goes on holiday with friends or to a concert etc she pays herself. Some classmates live out of town, she pays for tram/train. She wanted more mobile data than we were prepared to pay so she pays the few £ extra. So the £40 covers a lot more than clothes. We pay for essentials and toiletries like shower stuff, she pays for make up. The first few months was hard biting my tongue but she's been really sensible since.

It sounds like a lot but a) we're actually spending less and b) she's learning to think before she buys something. She's paying for a summer holiday with friends and also for camp in the summer (we're paying for training, she's being a leader but will have to pay a small amount for travelling)

She also got herself 2 part time jobs. 1 pays into her account and we've locked her card away so she isn't tempted to spend too easily.

School lunches is separate but we worked out what she needs over 42 weeks and divided it into 12 months so August she needs to be careful not to spend that part.

DH didn't think it would work but it did. Brilliantly.

user1484394242 · 15/02/2017 18:02

DD isn't my 16th child 😁😁😁
She is 16 years old

RB68 · 15/02/2017 18:28

DD yr 7 aged 11 gets £30 a month plus £20 a week (ish) food for lunches, I tried to encourage snack taking in but it hasn't worked and its evened out at about that per week. I buy her a 4 pack of choc in the food shop. And cover basics like shampoo and conditioner unless she wants something really fancy and its not on offer bringing it into line with what I would normally get. She uses her £30 for games, toiletries, some clothes (ie not basics like coat/shoes, tops leggings but things she wants that are what i consider frivolous. So we often have a "can I have" and I say yes or no and if no she has the option to buy with her money. Its a bit free ranging and honestly when a kids magazine is 4 to 5 quid and a bar of choc 80p 5 to 10 a week doesn't go far

AndNowItsSeven · 15/02/2017 18:36

At 13 my dd had £45 a month but she had to pay her mobile bill out of it and nonessential clothes. E.g. If she needed jeans I would pay £20 - the regular price of kids jeans if she wanted Top Shop she would make up the difference.
I would also pay all bus fares.

FaintlyBaffled · 15/02/2017 18:43

DS (almost 13) gets £5 a week but has to pay for his Xbox live subscription and a small gift for DH and I for birthday and mothers/ Father's Day out of it (by small I means bar of chocolate or a bunch of daffodils)
He also has a small mobile contract at £12 a month that we pay for.
Once he's 13 he will get £10 a week but will need to pay for youth club out of this (I give him £3 a week for it and he always has change left over). He moves school in September so we will re-evaluate then if he decides he wants to eat in the canteen. School bus is free as we are rural and he always needs lifts into town anyway as there are no public buses.

booellesmum · 15/02/2017 18:47

DD(15) and DD(12) get £20 a month.
They also have magazine subscriptions on top of that.

OSETmum · 15/02/2017 18:50

Ds gets £10 a month but he's only 7 so doesn't go anywhere on his own. He'll get more when he goes out with friends etc.

TaliDiNozzo · 15/02/2017 18:56

I first got pocket money in 1990 at the age of 7 and got £2.50 per week so to me the £10 a month is ridiculously low and stingy if not based on what you can afford.

We give £1 per week per year of age.

Wallywobbles · 15/02/2017 19:00

We do it a bit differently for DD12. I took everything I thought she needed (not wanted) for her wardrobe. Knickers, socks, shoes, sports stuff, winter boots, etc. Everything that doesn't get bought in the supermarket.

Then I gave it all a value and halved because she already has everything she needed.

Then divided by 12, and that's what she gets. 40€/month.

Little sister 11 gets a 1/3 less as she gets all the hand me downs. DSD gets 1/2 as we have her 50/50.

I did a couple of shops with everyone in H&M and quite a lot of clothes for Christmas.

End of year one DD2 and DSD have 250€ in the bank. DD1 spent down to the line by deciding to buy Christmas presents for us all. So it's a good system but needs some tweaking depending on the character of the child.

Wallywobbles · 15/02/2017 19:05

I also pay mobile which is 16€ unlimited

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