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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Comments that homeowners make to renters

109 replies

malificent7 · 23/12/2016 12:42

Here are a few gwms:

Of course homeownwrs take more pride in there homes and tidy them more (my rented house was messy as i was depressed)

Oh you SHOULD get a mortagage... with what? Peanuts@

The landlord cant even be bothered to tart up your kitchen... the doors ate hanging off. ( One door is sliggtly hanging off after being repaired repeatedly.

Its a shame that all your money is going to the landlord.

Aibu to find such comments very irritating?

OP posts:
Original poster
malificent7 · 23/12/2016 12:42

Typos... agggrrr!

A few gems even!

OP posts:
RachelRagged · 23/12/2016 12:44

No you are not BU

I don't understand the obsession with home ownership in this country I really don't .

BolivarAtasco · 23/12/2016 12:45

I don't know. I rented for about 15 years and can't remember a single occasion where someone made a negative comment about it vs owning.

RichardBucket · 23/12/2016 12:47

YANBU

The worst is "it's just dead money" or the like. Because that's a nice thing to say to someone with no choice, isn't it?

boreddrinker · 23/12/2016 12:51

YANBU. I own now but rented for years and comments were awful. For example, LL had some new windows put in, they left a mess behind. Complained to my friend who said "they probably did it because it's just a rented house"..... Confused

Now I own three and she hardly talks to me.... I think people like lording above others

HoHoHammered · 23/12/2016 12:52

Rented since I've moved out. Never had a bad comment yet

But essentially this is my home and I treat it like it

So it's clean and tidy and any repairs are done by us unless it's something drastic that requires LL intervention.

Such as the burst pipe in the bathroom. Needed the LL to approve the fixing

thatstoast · 23/12/2016 12:54

To be honest, having bought 3 years ago, I think I prefer renting. However, I was lucky in that I had a great landlord. No inspections, very quick to fix things, no rent increases over 7 years. So it was weird when my best friend said, "it must be such a relief owning your house and not having to be inspected all the time" like the landlord was always waiting outside my door with a clipboard and a red pen.

Puffinitee · 23/12/2016 12:57

FIL has a knack for making comments like this - he'll start off all helpful about how he can support us if we want to buy, but then can't resist throwing in a comment like "Well you don't want to be giving a thousand quid a month to some dentist" (private landlord). Conveniently ignoring the fact he owns three properties himself of which one is rented out. Can you tell I'm slightly dreading spending Christmas with him?

HoHoHammered · 23/12/2016 12:57

Yeah we've been here nearly 2 years and haven't had an inspection yet.

Only met the LL for the first time in the summer and she only came down because she wanted to put an oven in her own private shed. (She has two. One for her and one we can use)

We have no problem with this and in return we get free run of the house, whatever animals we like, what ever decorating we like and a stable rent which is lower than most

DubiousCredentials · 23/12/2016 12:59

I don't understand the obsession with home ownership in this country I really don't

Maybe something to do with private renting being totally shit in the UK. We lived in 6 houses where the landlord decided to sell less than a yr after we moved in. Plus ridiculous rents etc.

lovelearning · 23/12/2016 13:02

The worst is "it's just dead money" or the like. Because that's a nice thing to say to someone with no choice, isn't it?

RichardBucket, oracle.

DeliciouslyHella · 23/12/2016 13:02

God, YADNBU.

When now DH and I were renting we had so many comments from our friends. We chose to rent as we wanted to test living together before committing to a mortgage. We felt it was just too risky to shove all our savings together and buy somewhere when we hadn't actually worked out if we were totally compatible together.

SleepFreeZone · 23/12/2016 13:07

I hate the 'dead mine 'comment intensely.

JennyOnAPlate · 23/12/2016 13:07

The obsession with homeownership comes from the shitty deal a lot of renters get. I have a few friends (all with dc under 10) who rent, and they're never in one place for longer than a year. It must make life very stressful.

OutDamnedWind · 23/12/2016 13:07

The one we keep getting at the moment is that their monthly mortgage payments are the same as/not much more/less than our rent, why don't we just go for the mortgage?

Because clearly we can just magic up a deposit Hmm

WeeMadArthur · 23/12/2016 13:10

One of the senior managers in my work once told me off for renting and said that it was just throwing money down the drain. He was a bit embarrassed when I pointed out that there was no way the wage they paid me would get me a mortgage to buy a one bed flat so I didn't have an option!

I think the least realistic comments I've heard come from homeowners over the age of 50, who bought when prices were so much lower in comparison to wages, and now they have comparatively larger amounts of equity allowing them to move up the ladder (looking at you DM). It's easy to make these comments when you bought your first house in the seventies and your mortgage is nil, or minimal.

NickyEds · 23/12/2016 13:12

"Have you thought of buying?" . Hang on, you can buy houses, well fuck me that changes everything!

"Wow, your rent is much more than my mortgage" yes, you bought 18 years ago.

"Can you really not save a couple of thousand for a deposit?" Maybe, but a couple of thousand really won't cut it.

"I could never rent, I'd hate the insecurity", we don't all have a choice and yes, the insecurity is shit.

Anywhichway123 · 23/12/2016 13:17

"You're wasting your money paying off someone elses mortgage and you'll have nothing to show for it at the end"

"You're taking care of someone elses retirement but you'll still be having to pay rent when you're retired"

"Wouldn't you rather own?"

"I would hate to rent, pay out all that money and have nothing to show for it"

"It's not your home if you rent it's someone elses"

"My mortgage is a fraction of your rent"

Aaaaaaaargh!!!!

Judydreamsofhorses · 23/12/2016 13:24

I owned a flat, but sold it to move in with DP - we now rent. My flat was in an old Victorian building, needed constant communal roof repairs, and was an absolute money-pit. I far prefer renting.

MikeUniformMike · 23/12/2016 13:25

HO:Renting is just throwing money away.

Me:Yes. Course it is. I thought of living in a tent or a cave.

NoToast · 23/12/2016 13:26

Boreddrinker wonder if you're friend was just making a point about the builders mentality. I rented my house out when I had to move away for work for a short period. One electrician came in through the letting agents and did a hideously ugly bodge job which I don't think he'd have done in a private house (with somebody resident to hold him to account for the job they were paying for).

Another time we were getting fire alarms wired in and another electrician suggested to my dad that he ran cables along the ceiling, when my dad complained it would look ugly he was told, 'it's just a rented house'.

It's a shit attitude.

I have a single friend living in professional house shares in her late 30's. No other realistic option, mortgage impossible although she works full time and not enough money to rent a flat on her own- she's really unhappy with her situation always trying for promotions, trying to date etc. The comments she hates most are people telling her it's fine or they understand because they lived in a house share when they were students or teenagers and it's fun or whatever. Not when you're an adult that wants some security and privacy and autonomy it's not.

Jaxhog · 23/12/2016 13:27

We bought our first house in the 70s and had to put up with comments from renting friends asking us why we were spending all our money on a mortgage (rates of 17.5% at the time), as we couldn't afford to go out. So it works both ways.

I don't think it's anyone's business whether you rent or buy really. Swings and roundabouts.

smellylittleorange · 23/12/2016 13:32

YADNBU - the obsession with home ownership in this country is partly to do with rubbish Landlords but more often then not it is bandied around by those who were lucky enough to be able to buy at the right time . In particular Ex Local Authority houses were sold off ten a penny in the 80s/90s nowdays in some some towns they are at least 5 x their purchase price - there is no empathy for those who were not in the right position at the right time to buy and over the years I have had lots of snooty comments especially from members of my own family.

Renting does have it's advantages. I was able to live in the centre of town with great transport links near to all the local shops and ( unplanned) excellent schools. We lived in one place for 14 years. I loved my little house it was old and full of character and we made do. I couldn't decorate but I doubt I'd do much more in my new house - I like my walls a neutral colour! It annoys me now we have a great big mortgage that our life is automatically "better" somehow just because we own. I was ambivalent but my husband really wanted to do it - he will be 70 by the time our mortgage runs out - we will have paid literally thousands more than our peers some of whom have paid off their mortgages. It is scary stuff I can't see how we could pay it off earlier but we will I guess.

ScruffyTheJanitor · 23/12/2016 13:35

A few gems for ranted people to fire back:

"Wouldn't it be a shame if your boiler exploded and you had to foot the bill"

"Wouldn't it be awful if your garden wall fell down and you had to foot the bill"

"wouldn't it be terrible if there was a problem with your roof and you had to foot the bill"

"I would hate for you to get bad neighbours whilst your stuck, unable to sell, in this house."

ScruffyTheJanitor · 23/12/2016 13:36

ranted = rented.

but I think ranted fits well too. Grin