I know how you love neighbour issues MN...

[basketofironing]

WWYD in this situation:

The house next door to us (terrace) is rented. The couple that live there are late 30s (ish) and we are on generally good terms with them, though I wouldn't say we are friendly IYSWIM.

Currently, as in right now, they are having a loud gathering (I think there are about 4/5 of them there) and have been since I woke up about an hour ago. I'm not sure they would have woken me up if DD hadn't woken up screaming at that time.

When I say loud gathering, I mean they were upstairs talking very loudly and having a bit of a laugh. Our walls are 8" thick at best so they might as well have been within my own house. They then moved downstairs and proceeded to sing loudly for a good 20 minutes but seem to have quietened now.

They've done this a few times previously, most recently about 3/4 weeks ago and not for months before that so it's not a regular thing. Because of this I've never mentioned it before as it never seemed worth it to piss on their bonfire for a one off thing.

However, I feel that by not mentioning how loud they are before now, I've set a precedent and would sound like a complete bitch to say anything to them now.

I should add that the increased noise earlier also prevented DD from going back to sleep however can't fully blame nextdoor as she is possibly teething so expected a rough night already anyway.

WWYD- anything at all? I'm tempted to mention to them in passing next time I see them. WTBU?

Tricky one because if you can hear them they can probably hear your DD screaming , although loud singing is a bit different to a baby crying .

How would you word it ?

Will also add.
DD is. 8 months and I have apologised to nextdoor in the past when she has had all night screaming fits (I'd heard them moving around in the middle of the night after one of these so knew it'd disturbed their sleep) and they acknowledged having heard her so they know how thin the walls are.
And they know I've been awake tonight because they will have heard me go down into the kitchen to get a drink. Yes our walls are really that thin!!

XPost condensedmilk! Just explained about DD!

Yes mention it. Sometimes you don't realise how noise carries. if they give a shit, they will be apologetic and try to keep it down in future, and even give you their number so you can call them.
If they don't give a shit, then there's other steps you can take such as calling noise pollution.

Do they seem reasonable?

They do seem reasonable, yes. However I'm such a sarcastic bitch I don't think I'd be able to help myself with a passive aggressive 'good night last night?'

You could try ' I noticed the loud singing last night , Was it an attempt to drown out my babies crying ?'

Maybe not . I'm also not good at wording things , which is why I'd wimp out !

What's the significance of it being rented?

Don't mention it. Your DD probably cries a lot more often and loudly than some singing and talking once a month! This will only encourage them to retaliate with complaints about your child. Don't go there.

November there wasn't any, not sure if I intended to elaborate on why it was significant.
A lot of houses on our road are rented and IME those households usually stay a few years and move on so don't seem as bothered being friendly with neighbours or about behaviours that could annoy other residents as they aren't settling down here. I'm not saying everyone who owns their home is the most fantastic neighbour (I hate our other neighbour with a passion but that's another post altogether) or that all rentals are pillocks that just seems to have been my experience.

Quick update. Just went and asked them to turn it down now. 4:30am is really pushing it.

Good for you .

4:30am! I'd have been going batshit at them by then.

Do you live on my street OP? constant parties drive me up the wall.
There was one last night but I wasn't too bothered as the DCs are away this weekend. I was however, furious when other selfish arseholes woke both my DCs up at 3am recently.

I know everyone says live ans let live if it's just a one off but that's the thing, it almost sets a precedent as there's always going to be someone's birthday / anniversary / Christmas / Easter / bbq parties in the summer. Those one offs turn into regular occurrences by several neighbours and it's just disrespectful. My other neighbour has still had to leave for work at 7am this morning despite the disturbance last night.

I think its very important how you say it. If your angry about it they can think f you, but if your nice most ppl will try to keep it down. When your at a party last thing on your mind is noise levels & if your disturbing anyone. Maybe they could just move to the other side of the house. Also, I wouldn't feel bad about baby crying. Thats what they do & its out of your control. Parties are different.

Fuck that. I phoned the police on my upstairs neighbour when she was playing music at daft o'clock and she wouldn't answer the door so they broke it to gain access and we haven't heard a peep since.
(This wasn't the first time she had caused issues for us!)

MistyDays

I like your style, but unfortunately in the UK, the poor police has no power to do anything, and has nowhere near resources to send someone when you have troubles with the neighbours.

In a way, it's easier to deal with people renting because you can complain to their agency/ landlords who can act. We did have noisy neighbours and their lease was not renewed so we only suffered for a year. If they own the property, you are stuck.

This was in the U.K. Scotland. The police were great they gave her chance after chance to open the door. They said the music was too loud and therefore they had to break the door and gain access. They responded so quickly as well I called them and it took them about 15 mins to arrive. The landlord had to replace the door which she obviously had to pay for then he came downstairs and apologised to us.

As I've posted here, we have endured 3 years of the neighbours from hell and, looking back, my biggest mistake was not reacting instantly. The day they moved in they were arguing loudly and, because we could hear every word and it was violent and threatening, we should have rang the police and fired a warning shot across their bows before they could get a secure tenancy.

But we just put it down to moving being incredibly stressful, etc etc, made excuses for them, cut them slack. Biggest mistake I made in my life.

You've spoken to them now but honestly, next time, I'd ring the police and let them deal with it. And Environmental Health.

If they can hear you going down for a glass of water and you can hear them talking, why not get together with the landlord and see what your options are for getting some soundproofing done.

Did they pack in the noise when you went and complained?

A joint problem these days poor acoustic insulation standards and people who don't give a shit about how much nuisance they can be with excessive noise:(

That's precisely it justaboy

Ironically enough, usual parry neighbour is in a foul mood this morning afyrt bring kept awake most of the night by snktnet neighbour having a party until the early hours.

I mean, if that annoyed them surely they should be able to see how much inconvenience their constant parties cause.

after and another . Sorry for spelling mistakes.

why not get together with the landlord and see what your options are for getting some soundproofing done.

The landlord will not do this because they don't have to live there.

They do seem reasonable, yes. However I'm such a sarcastic bitch I don't think I'd be able to help myself with a passive aggressive 'good night last night?'

^^ this attitude from the OP is not constructive either. Did they pack it in when you eventually went round OP? It would have been completely reasonable to go round there a couple of hours before you first posted rather than stewing about it on MN.

basket what happened after you spoke to them, did it quieten down ?