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Original poster

Stopping colouring my hair

59 replies

mumtomaxwell · 24/10/2016 08:25

I'm 39 and my roots are almost entirely white/grey. I was born with dark brown hair and have maintained that colour since I started going noticeably grey in my early 20s. Am now considering letting it grow out to my new natural colour - white! WWYD?

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NavyandWhite · 24/10/2016 08:29

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Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TheWitTank · 24/10/2016 08:32

Absolutely do it if you want! Embrace the grey. I don't really like that stark contrast between the brown and grey while growing out though, so I would maybe see a hairdresser for a decent cut off the length and a lighter colour over so the roots were not so obvious for a while. Get it dyed grey! It is very fashionable right now.

yorkshapudding · 24/10/2016 08:33

If the grey/white hair bothers you then dye it. If it doesn't, don't.

Not sure what the dilemma is to be honest.

SlatternIsTrying · 24/10/2016 08:35

I have similar colouring. I did contemplate in my early 30's just letting it go but a close friend told me in the nicest possible way that it really aged me.

I thought about it again when pregnant but realised that when feeling fat and frumpy it wasn't a good time to look older too.

I am now early 40's and still dye it. But, I don't hide the fact I colour it. I make no pretence that it is natural and I enjoy changing the colour and tones about. Somebody commented the other day that every time they see me my hair is a different colour. I was happy with that.

Embrace and enjoy the colour.

Wrinklytights · 24/10/2016 08:39

I'm 36 and have the same dilemma. My roots are a lovely silver colour, but I just don't think I'm ready for how aging it will be just yet. The maintenance is a pain though. I think if you're confident - go for it.

Tootsiepops · 24/10/2016 08:40

I stopped dying my hair two years ago aged 35 and it is now completely grey. Teenagers regularly ask me where I get it coloured (I had no idea the young people were dying their hair grey on purpose Grin)

It was a PITA at certain points when I was growing the colour out and it did not always look good, but I am so very happy I persevered with it. It looks great now if I do say so myself and all that time and money saved sitting around in the hairdressers is an added bonus.

Go for it!

ConkerTriumphant · 24/10/2016 08:41

I have short hair and I'm now 46. I grew out my dyed hair about a year ago because I was sick to death of the upkeep and the colour had started to look very artificial in me.

My silver hair is beautiful!
It hasn't aged me but it has made me look my age. I'm ok with that! I'm not trying to look young (why would I?).

There is a brilliant group on Facebook called 'Going Gorgeously Gray' which I found inspirational and supportive.

Unleash your sparkle!

tonsiltennis · 24/10/2016 08:41

I hear you. My once black as night hair is now white on the top and sides and I've settled on a light brown with blonde highlights near the parting. I debated at length whether to grow it all out and go natural but after extensive study of Pinterest, I worked out that to get away with grey hair under 65, you need to have a very high level of daily grooming, lipstick 24/7 and a probably a tan. Otherwise there's a very real risk of looking like a hairy type who has given up. So although it's a pain in the neck to have to do your roots every few weeks, it's nothing compared to what would have to be done daily.

Justjoseph · 24/10/2016 08:42

I dye mine, it looks awful grey. My mother went naturally grey about 15 years ago...she looked older and like she didn't care about her appearance.

tonsiltennis · 24/10/2016 08:44

Cross posted - I think there's a fine line between it looking like a fashion choice, and it looking like a surrender to old age. I absolutely DONT want to look my age and I know grey on me would put years on. Ugh.

elQuintoConyo · 24/10/2016 08:44

A close friend told me in the most direct way that grey/white hair was ageing. I just smiled and nodded while looking at her red/brown dye job that doesn't suit her skintone, with roots.

I have similar colouring to you op. May last year I stopped dyeing completely. I am now pure white wuth under-streams of dark grey it is fabulous! My hairdresser loves it and has been very supportive of the change, which helps.

DH loves it, my best friend has been waxing lyrical, my life is less faffy, I don't look invisible I look striking.

But fuck 'it's fashionable', I did it for me and I'm beyond happy that I did. Growing it out was um interesting! But I just grew it, I didn't get it stripped and dyed grey/ash blonde etc.

I am 41, my inner 'don't give a shit-o-meter' it set to high Grin

elQuintoConyo · 24/10/2016 08:49

I have an inverted bob and it takes 1/10 for maintanence.

I am pale with clear blue eyes. I have dark glasses (frames) and a lipstick takes seconds to slap on. My hair suits me.

My clothes are also well-fitting and not a fray/missing button/jam stain in sight, in colours that suit my face.

I don't look old. I look 41. Having had several friends/relatives die before 41 I am happy to still be around, annoying people with my mane Grin

EchidnasPhone · 24/10/2016 08:50

I have been contemplating it but I think unwound need to get my dark hair stripped to tie in with the grey regrowth as otherwise it'd be really mismatched - shiny grey then dark brown. My hair is super long also so it would seem weird to me. I've had greys for about 15 years now but they're much more pronounced now but at 38 I can't quite give over to going grey. To me it's still a sign of old age.

NavyandWhite · 24/10/2016 08:51

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Thefitfatty · 24/10/2016 08:53

I'm letting mine grow out, but I had silver highlights put in first. That way the grow out is less noticeable. It's pretty easy to keep them fresh looking with silver shampoo as well. I think it looks fantastic, and I've gotten loads of compliments. I think it makes me look younger too. I'm 35 btw and found my first grey when I was 16.

ConkerTriumphant · 24/10/2016 08:54

Tonsil tennis I'm now completely grey with no tan and no lipstick ever!

I think it's a myth that we need extra grooming to look good grey. The changes in our skin tone over time mean that the grey our hair becomes suits us as much as our natural colour did when we were small.

Cisoff · 24/10/2016 08:59

I did it. It was awful, but when it was long enough I got it cut short. It is mostly grey/white at the front, and mostly my natural colour at the back.

I've had compliments, followed up with a "but it wouldn't suit me". I have a theory that grey hair would look perfectly fine on everyone. I never looked a bloke and thought 'oh, he really should cover his greys'. I don't actually think it makes people look older or younger. Just...different. We're just used to seeing women without grey hair, yet on men, we expect it.

I think one's skin is the most ageing feature (or not, as the case may be).

hazeyjane · 24/10/2016 09:01

after years of dying hair and bleaching platinum blonde, I have stopped dying it. It is now a lovely cross between badger and tabby cat, with a really white bit at the front.

I actually really like it, but dd's friends, are Shock at it, 'wha'happened Mrs Hazeyjane??!!'

I might start wearing a scraggy old pink housecoat and slippers and just saying, 'well I have just decided to let myself go dears..'

tonsiltennis · 24/10/2016 09:19

Conker "
I think it's a myth that we need extra grooming to look good grey. The changes in our skin tone over time mean that the grey our hair becomes suits us as much as our natural colour did when we were small."

I think you've got a point perhaps if you go grey at the normal rate, whatever that is. I was iron grey all over by the time I was 25 and my skin had no way caught up, nor has it now, at pushing 50.

I think that if you have pinky/warm tones it's very very hard to get away with grey because it's such a blue/cool colour and that's what's so draining if your skin doesn't match.

ClaudiaApfelstrudel · 24/10/2016 09:21

I like the colour itself but the problem for me is it's asscociation with old age. If you can handle that then go for it, my mum recently embraced the grey and it looks really good she looks like a proper 70 year old now no-nonsense!

CheeseToastie123 · 24/10/2016 09:27

I'm 37, and loving my grey. If I get bored with it, I'll colour it again but after 20 years of dyes, I have finally embraced my natural colour. I get loads of compliments, only colour that ever got more was pink

PoppyBirdOnAWire · 24/10/2016 09:28

Grey hair is ageing. Why would anyone who is prematurely grey not wish to have a proper colour as most of their peers do?
Grey hair doesn't look shiny. IMO

ConkerTriumphant · 24/10/2016 09:43

Poppy how is grey 'not a proper colour'?!

I am in my mid forties. I no longer I never did care about what colour my peers choose to put on their hair.

It's simply not true that grey hair can't look shiny. We are living in an age where the technology means we have every product known to man - grey hair can be shiny, if you wish to make it shiny.

scaryteacher · 24/10/2016 09:47

I tried growing my colour out about 4 years ago at 46. I soon had it redone, as I have gone very dark naturally with bits of grey in it and it drained me. If I could wake up and be a lovely Judi Dench or Sheila Hancock grey, then I'd grow it out, but I think it's going to be a long drawn out process. I was a bit perturbed at how much I looked like my maternal grandmother with the colour out.

PoppyBirdOnAWire · 24/10/2016 09:48

"ConkerTriumphant

Poppy how is grey 'not a proper colour'?!"

What I was trying to say - obviously unsuccessfully - is that unless your hair is grey from birth, it is not your proper/natural colour. Grey is what is left when your hair loses its proper colour.

Grey hair is dull. And ageing.

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