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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To spend my PIP on new boots?

59 replies

FlapsTie · 19/10/2016 07:47

I let slip to my sister that I receive PIP (for MH stuff) a while ago, god knows why I did because I knew it would bite me on the bum.

I bought myself some really good boots last week. Primarily because I can no longer drive and have a mile to walk to school, so four miles a day, plus dog walks.

Anyway, my sister made a snippy comment about 'nice to know this is what your benefits are spent on' the other day.

I pointed out that this is exactly what PIP is for, to help with the costs that my illness incurs. I also get ESA because I can't currently work. DH has a good job and I know my sister (and my mum) think I shouldn't claim anything at all.

I know they now think I am totally unreasonable to be claiming and spending money on 'luxuries' like decent boots.

Am I unreasonable? I know the unreasonable thing was giving them this ammo but that's done now.

OP posts:
witsender · 19/10/2016 07:52

Well, as it is all just money that comes from your bank account, which presumably comes from a multitude of sources, there is nothing tl say that it is your pip that paid! So that could be pointed out.

But more to the point, your sister sounds like an unsupportive arse, yanbu.

boo2410 · 19/10/2016 07:55

YANBU

In my opinion they sound like an essential and not a luxury. Even if they aren't it's naff all to do with them so ignore them. If/when you worked before you paid your taxes, as does your husband, bet you didn't complain about how peoples benefit was spent.

Happy walking.

ErrolTheDragon · 19/10/2016 07:58

If you need to walk four miles a day, good footwear isn't a luxury, its an important part of your form of transport.

VodkaValiumLattePlease · 19/10/2016 08:01

Hi I work in benefits (if this makes a difference), of course it's fine to buy boots! Enjoy them and ignore comments like that!

NameChange30 · 19/10/2016 08:02

Hmm, I wonder if your mum and sister's attitude has anything to do with the fact you have mental health issues in the first place?!
They are being unreasonable (and bitchy) and I suggest you disengage with them as much as possible.
Enjoy your new boots Smile

WanderingTrolley1 · 19/10/2016 08:04

You can spend your PIP on whatever you want, be that boots or a facial.

frikadela01 · 19/10/2016 08:04

Yanbu your boots clearly aren't a luxury but a necessity.
And even if they weren't it's no one's business what you spend your money on. If we start policing how people spend benefits then we might as well scrap actual money and just give out vouchers for the "essentials" because God forbid people on benefits have the occasional luxury.

EdmundCleverClogs · 19/10/2016 08:07

Shoes aren't a luxury Hmm. I presume they just walk around like barefooted martyrs? Or are you just meant to sit on your money, like Fagin with ill-gained goods?

Hope the new shoes are comfortable! I can never find decent walking boots (may explain why my poor ankles are constantly swollen).

Laiste · 19/10/2016 08:09

''I pointed out that this is exactly what PIP is for, to help with the costs that my illness incurs.''

And you were right. They're being arses, take no notice.

I read your title as new boobs! Grin

IHaveBrilloHair · 19/10/2016 08:13

Spend it on whatever you like, I do the same so long as all essentials are paid for, inevitably some of what is spent is to do with illness anyway.

Didijustgetwinkpointshitcanned · 19/10/2016 08:14

Yanbu! You need boots to get out the house. Sounds like they are having that weird benefit jealousy some people get. Like they are jealous you get given money and they conveniently ignore the fact that it's because you are ill. They don't want you to claim it or spend it because they can't claim it or spend it Grin

ThumbWitchesAbroad · 19/10/2016 08:18

Oh OP - your mum and sister clearly expect you to spend your PIP on things that they consider appropriate to your health, not what you actually need!

Next time, run it past them first to make sure they approve... oh no, wait, that's really stupid, they don't have the first fucking clue so just ignore the silly twats. Grin

You can do exactly what you like with the money you have got. It's hardly a walk in the park to get the money in the first place, so you have clearly passed all the assessments and need to have it - and then it's up to YOU to decide how best to spend it to help YOU in YOUR life. Not your dopey mother and sister, who sound like the sort of Daily Heil hags who would moan about how unfair it was if you got a Mobility car as well.

Enjoy your boots!

megletthesecond · 19/10/2016 08:19

Yanbu. You spent your money on boots to allow you to keep active and get from a to b. Entirely sensible.

ohtheholidays · 19/10/2016 08:19

YANBU but your sister was and don't blame yourself for telling her what you spent it on she's your sister you should be able to tell her stuff like that without it coming back to bite you on the arse(not always possible I know with some familys are like)I have some family members like that,I no longer bother with them.

I receive DLA and I spend it on what I want to,I buy things that can help me and that's exactly what you've done!

paulapantsdown · 19/10/2016 08:21

Well the government has decided that you are perfectly entitled to this money so who the hell are your family to think they know better?!

You have bought shoes to walk in for goodness sake - but even if you had spent it in a casino it's none of their business.

Original poster
FlapsTie · 19/10/2016 08:23

I'm really tempted now to buy something ridiculously flash, like a mulberry or a bling watch, splash it all over FB and then return it.

OP posts:
EdmundCleverClogs · 19/10/2016 08:26

FlapsTie, do you know anyone who's good at photoshop? I'd have them paste in all manner of expensive items in a picture of you Grin.

DianaMitford · 19/10/2016 08:29

I honestly read that title as "....new boobs." BlushGrin

Original poster
FlapsTie · 19/10/2016 08:29
Grin
OP posts:
acatcalledjohn · 19/10/2016 08:29

I presume they just walk around like barefooted martyrs?

It's probably more a case of them expecting those on benefits to walk around like barefooted martyrs.

Perhaps point out that they should be pleased you are disabled, because having been rendered unable to drive saves the taxpayer some money, what with boots being a lot cheaper than cars.

But I do have a goady personality when people say stupid things.

Original poster
FlapsTie · 19/10/2016 08:30

Haha at the 'new boobs' posts. I think their heads would explode.

OP posts:
acatcalledjohn · 19/10/2016 08:30

Oh, and Flaps, sorry to read you're in that situation. Being disabled isn't fun - growing up with a father on disability benefits for a good chunk of my childhood taught me that.

Bloopbleep · 19/10/2016 08:32

Try visiting them barefoot a few times and letting their neighbour's see. You can mouth at their neighbour's "on benefits" while pointing to your bare feet...

Seriously what does she think you're going to wear on your feet? What if you'd bought them off eBay or from a charity shop?

I suspect you might get a few responses telling you you should be naked foraging in forests for food and clothes...

Eliza22 · 19/10/2016 08:34

If you have been assessed as needing PIP and are receiving it (and I believe the assessment is very thorough) then it is nobody's business what you spend your money on.

End of.

If your need good footwear for your journey, so be it.

graphista · 19/10/2016 08:39

Arses!

Not only are shoes an essential, good ones last longer (therefore proving cheaper long term), all that walking will be aiding your physical health, plus exercise has been proven to help mental health!

I too am on esa and DLA, family mostly ok but I have had the odd stupid comment from one relative. (Plus loads from ignorant strangers!)