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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

AIBU Pop music knowledge

56 replies

Narnia72 · 27/09/2016 10:40

AIBU to not want my 8 year old to grow up too quickly?

She came home yesterday (having friendship problems anyway so I am more sensitive to these things atm) saying that she wasn't "cool" and the cool girls all know about pop music and she doesn't.

I've never stopped her from listening to anything, but we have radio 2, 3 or classic fm on as a default. In the car they all (she's the eldest of 3) like either story cds or musicals,

I don't remember getting into pop music until I was at least 12, but I had quite old fashioned parents. TBH I've never really paid much attention to the latest trends as I'm a classical musician, so the kids have been more exposed to that.

So, if I am BU, which I probably am, what's the best way to give an 8 year old a crash course in the latest music and what should I get her listening to? Radio 1?

Help an old fuddy duddy please....

OP posts:

Only1scoop · 27/09/2016 10:41

Watching with interest

RiverTam · 27/09/2016 10:42

I'm an old fuddy duddy too. Radio is mainly Absolute 80s or Radio 4. DH is into music but not pop stuff really.

I got around this by getting DD (6) a Now compilation CD which she sticks on every so often.

HateSummer · 27/09/2016 10:46

My dd is nearly 9. Blanket ban on all music videos. Most are disgusting. Radio 1 is only allowed in the car so I can switch over if some unsavoury lyrics come up (ariana grande's new song is filthy). Otherwise, she listens to pop songs I like. She knows Justin timberlake, Michael Jackson and likes Justin bieber, Zara Larson. I'd go through some songs on YouTube and decide what's appropriate.

Mylittlelights · 27/09/2016 10:47

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

EdmundCleverClogs · 27/09/2016 10:52

I think you're being a tad unreasonable. I don't believe in 'fitting in for the sake of it', but pop music/culture is called such for a reason. In my day, if you didn't know at least one Spice Girl routine, you weren't cool (I wasn't).

I have to add, my partner was brought up in a similar way and is an unbelievable snob about pop music (he was teased about it). I don't enjoy Radio 1, but a bit of local radio or Heart FM never did me harm as a child either (though, I'm still in love with Robbie Williams 20 years on ).

I think it's up to your daughter to chose what she listens to and not force classical music onto her (or bore her senseless with radio 2/3, really not interesting to a girl her age). Chances are, she'll naturally enjoy the things you listen to, but I think mixing it up would do no harm.

Ego147 · 27/09/2016 10:52

We just have the local commercial station on in the car. Radio 4 and Classic when he's not in the car.

I wouldn't listen to me though as I only got 'on trend' when I was 22 and that lasted for 2 years. Britpop and all that

Gatehouse77 · 27/09/2016 10:54

Despite being well outside their demographic I listen to Radio 1! But not Nick Grimsha, for the mornings I listen to Radio 1Xtra as I can't stand adverts.

I guess from that POV mine have always listened to current music because I like it. As they've got older they have found their own stuff through friends, XBox games soundtracks and YouTube.

LetsJunglyJumpToIt · 27/09/2016 11:22

I listened to radio 1 as a child but my step dad forced us to listen to classical as he thought all pop music was rubbish and I needed to be educated. I hated being made to sit and listen to classical and didn't listen to it at all as a teenager, instead I went through the whole Britpop thing.

My DC like all sorts of music. We listen to Capital or Radio 2. I've never forced them to like one thing or another. They like classical too and love watching the proms and seeing the instruments. Just play a variety. It's up to your children what they choose to like and the less you force upon them the more they'll find they like something.

GirlOverboard · 27/09/2016 11:41

Radio 1 is aimed at 15-29 year olds and it's not particularly pop. You'd be better off with Capital FM.

Maybe try some greatest hits CDs too. I'd recommend Girls Aloud - Ten, Spice Girls - Greatest Hits, Sugababes - Overloaded and Britney Spears - My Prerogative. Much better than most of the pop music around at the moment.

Spotify is good too. Try one of the playlists for new pop music (e.g The Pop List). Or make your own playlist of the latest Now CD. Just watch out for the tracks marked 'explicit'.

JessieMcJessie · 27/09/2016 11:45

Taylor Swift is the big fave of girls that age.

GiddyOnZackHunt · 27/09/2016 11:46

I am a fuddy duddy
In advice from my neice who is a little older than dd1 I started buying Now and Pop Party cds.
This has resulted in an unfortunate fondness for Nicole Shitsinger.
And an inability for me to attempt to say her real name because I keep saying ShitSinger.

AnneTwacky · 27/09/2016 11:47

There's always been risque songs littering the charts. I remember in the 80's innocently singing Centerfold by the J Geils Band.
Dd is just a bit older than yours and is also getting into chart music. I made her a playlist of ones I've vetted and she loves it. Arianna is not on it but more for reasons of schreechiness on past records than saucy lyrics.

Felascloak · 27/09/2016 11:54

Little mix. The vamps. Kiss FM.
I accidentally bought my DD a Rihanna CD at that age. It was a mistake .

LetsJunglyJumpToIt · 27/09/2016 11:55

Kisstory is my guilty pleasure in the car.

HarryPottersMagicWand · 27/09/2016 11:57

It is sad that they are growing up more quickly these day. Our school had a mufti day last week and my 8 year old chose what to wear based on how 'cool' it was. He's 8! Why does it matter. The subsequent positive comments about how cool his t shirt was have helped to fuel this as well. Plus he is the only one with it (we got it on holiday).

Our school has discos each term, which I usually help at. I was amazed at the upper juniors knowledge of music and dances to the songs. Whip Nae Nae came on and they all knew it (including the younger teachers). Some year 6 girls were doing slut drops!

I refuse to have music channels on because the videos are massively inappropriate. I have radio 1 on in the car and they pick up popular songs from there. I also have an extensive playlist on my I pod that they love listening too. A lot of it isn't bang up to date but there are a few that I hear when they come out so I download them.

I don't like the idea of my kids not fitting in because they will ultimately get picked on for it and I think music is a big thing so I'd turn off the classical stuff if I were you and get some other stuff on. The charts are played on a Saturday I think, you could start by putting that on the radio each week.

myownprivateidaho · 27/09/2016 12:03

I remember being that age and sad that I didn't know about pop music and neighbours -- I don't think this is a new thing. Let her listen to radio 1 if she likes, but surely it's better to just emphasise that she can listen to what she likes, she doesn't have to change to fit in etc. You don't want to validate the view that these other kids are 'cooler'!

CancellyMcChequeface · 27/09/2016 12:06

I was aware of pop music from a very young age because my mother listened to it all the time (and found it funny if I sang along to risque lyrics ). But as pop music was 'what my mum likes' I rebelled by becoming a teenage Goth, naturally.

I remember being embarrassed in my early 20s because I had no knowledge whatsoever of classical music, which made me feel ignorant - probably the same thing as OPs DD is experiencing, just with a very different social circle!

I think the best thing to do with children is let them listen to a wide variety of music and develop their own tastes.

wowfudge · 27/09/2016 12:19

I found an old transistor radio when I was about 7 and tuned it into some pop music stations. My music of choice was ABBA, but I'd heard plenty of other stuff growing up as my mum listened to Terry Wogan on Radio 2 when we were kids. This was 30+ years ago.

I don't think it harmed me/made me grow up too quickly and I have pretty broad musical tastes now. Things like wearing make-up, clothes which are too grown up and drinking alcohol are far worse. Mind you, one of my grandmas used to give us kids a snowball to drink at Christmas

wigglesrock · 27/09/2016 12:45

I'm in my 40s and I was well into "pop music" by the time I was 8. My parents were in their very early 30s when I was 8 and they listened to the radio, bought albums, my mum adored Madonna when she started, she was absolutely fascinated by her. We watched Culture Club, Wham etc on Top of the Pops. My youngest is 5 and she loves music, we listen to a commercial radio station in the car all the time. I have Pop Party CDs from when my older two were 7 or 8. My eldest is now 11 and her tastes have moved on . I have Spotify playlists for them - my husband inflicts his music on them in the car - it's a bit dull for me but they like bits and pieces. They love musicals as well - it gives them a lot if pleasure to just listen to music.

WhoKnowsWhereTheTimeG0es · 27/09/2016 12:57

I was into pop music by the time I was about 6, the oldest singles in my collection are from then. Mainly through watching TOTP as my parents were classical music / R4 people.

My DCs are 10 and 12, we don't have the radio on much and don't watch music channels so I started buying Pop Party CDs for them about 4 years ago and graduated to Now CDs a year or two later, they play these a lot. Neither of them has developed a strong liking for any particular band/singer but they know all the stuff that gets played at school discos, on the radio, at friends houses etc. And I enjoy them too, on the whole. The Pop Party ones have clean versions of songs with more adult lyrics.

My DD also loves musicals, we have lots of soundtrack albums and compilations.

Eolian · 27/09/2016 12:58

My dd is 11 and still not into pop music. But she's very at the idea of anyone doing things or wearing things just because other people think they are cool. I'm hoping that attitude will last as long as possible, but sadly I doubt it.

WhirlwindHugs · 27/09/2016 13:04

If she's struggling with friends I'd get her a radio or a couple of recent now cds. My mum (who loathes pop music!) did the same for me when I was in primary school - pop was super dire at the time (and I still preferred my dads classic rock collection!) but I knew what people were talking about and it did help with small talk until I found friends I had more in common with at secondary school.

Not all music videos are terrible - we have a kids playlist on youtube with songs the videos are fine for (okgo and particularly great) and they live dancing around the living room to that with friends.

WhirlwindHugs · 27/09/2016 13:05

are love

Henrysmycat · 27/09/2016 13:09

AW! I really don't know. We do listen to some radio 1 and she has some favourites like Little Mix and Galantis but that's about it. I think some radio 1 or if you have Spotify you can choose a chart.

DD is a theatre student at the weekends and she has turned a lot of kids in school into musicals which makes me laugh. (I dislike musicals) At her school cool is the one who knows ever lyric to the chimney song from Mary Poppins.
I don't know how long this fad will last before they all consider Death Metal the music du jour.
I grew up with pop and the local music (I'm not from the UK) and spend my teenage year rebelling by listening to Nick Cave and older music like Joy Division , The Cure, etc.

EastMidsMummy · 27/09/2016 13:09

Try Fun Kids on digital radio. Targeted at just your daughter's age group and less "full on" than Kiss, Capital or Radio 1.

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