Things You have learned as a mother

[pleasemothermay1]

That I am not supper nanny

You only see the edit version of most people children so it's often tempting to think your children are monsters and eveyone else's child is lovey

Teenagers are no fun and can be mostly Dickish and I wasn't expecting that tbh
I thought we be at lunch together mostly we argue about why he has a bottle of wee under his bed😷😳and why he feels at 16 he knows far more than I do at 34

3 children is most likey 1 to many for my skill set😁bit late now though

That you will never love anything as much as your children.

That even when they are asleep or being babysat, your thoughts still drift to them

It doesn't matter about your parenting style, what tools you use, which books you read, how calm/shouty/firm you are. If a pre-schooler wants to be a little bastard they will. LOUDLY.

How even the blackest of moods can be improved by a toddler thinking it's funny to stick a jammy finger up your nose and doing that proper belly laugh.

It may sound obvious to some but, all kids are different!

For example when we were young if my brothers or I were tired we'd just sort of curl up & go to sleep.

DS has never done that. He's 6 now & I'm amazed at how little sleep he appears to need!!!

please ha ha ha thanks for the laugh.
and why he feels at 16 he knows far more than I do at 34 try why at 15 she feels she knows more than me at 45! I know what you mean but I also remember being that age and the centre of your world is no longer family for a while but I remember that you do come back from those wilderness years and that is what I am hoping. Hang in there.

Love that need

That even when your children are adults, you will still worry about them and you will likely need them more than they need you. (And they grow up far too fast)

That it really is best to pick your battles. Carefully, calmly, wisely. Small stiff can wait.

That with 3 teenagers there is very rarely a day where where all of us are in a good mood - so we should savour it when it happens

Disclaimer - this may be coloured by school holidays (which I usually love) and shopping for school uniform on a very hot sticky busy day!

Also you can't fix or take all there pain away sometime the fact that they have experined it will make them stronger and wiser

Once heard ds when 15 crying because he had been dumped and all I could do was listen from the other side of the wall and listen to him beg the girl to give him another chance 😔

I have learnt that I still have no real idea how I do it, I'm just pleased I've managed over a decade of parenting and we're all still here!

The lightbulb moment for me was to go with the flow, talk to each other and stop comparing to other families/parents/children/mothers. We as a family do our own thing and sssshhh but it seems to be working, we're all so much happier.

Not hit the teenage years yet so we'll see how they go... I have discovered gin and some amazing friends so I'm hopeful at least they will get me through

I'm not as patient as I thought I was.

The sound of my kids arguing goes through my like nails down a blackboard and I have to work really hard to not intervene every time. I thought I'd be more tolerant of it.

Sitting with a cup of coffee at soft play can be weirdly satisfying, because it means your kids are at an age where they can go off and play without you needing to complete the toddler obstacle assault course twenty times in a row.

That you can sleep through your husband coming up to bed, getting changed, and generally faffing, but wake instantly if your child coughs or makes a noise.

That you should listen to them properly so that when they stick their finger in your face and tell you they have a "pooey finger" you don't mishear them and think they have said "poorly finger" and get shit in your mouth when you kiss the offered finger better

How fast time actually goes. When people say they don't stay babies for long I thought 'yeah yeah'. Now he is 1year and time has flown. He wasn't a baby for long. As soon as he was crawling the baby baby stage is gone.

How he makes me laugh.

How he has a dry sense of humour like me. How does he know whats funny?

How you adjust to waking up at night quicly. Wide awake, complete the feed and back to sleep. Not waking up OH whilst doing it all too. I gained skills.

To not say take anything they say at face value children don't lie but they do embellish and often don't get the context of things

Once ds told me teacher has sworn at him called him cunt😳Well I marched down the school went ape shit demanded to speak to the head

Turned out the teacher was from South America and was calling him cute I was so 🙊🙊🙊🙊couldn't look at her for the rest of the year

please|

A while ago, a girl I know from school posted (and continues to post) smiley, happy, picture perfect photos of her children.

Then I saw her out in public with her son. He was screaming and shouting, and she looked so bloody worn out. It was a million miles away from the image she felt like she had to create online.

That day, I made the decision to stop stressing about how perfect everyone else's children were compared to mine, and appreciated my dd for what she was. A happy, healthy, if not a little highly strung little girl.

That l won't have to pay for everything for ever. Learnt that today. Dd texted to say she was going to get her new glasses. My heart sank as here in lreland that is about 300 euros. Then l remembered she has been working for the summer and is getting her own this time. Hurrah it might be coming to an end, the constant paying.

Having kids taught me to not sweat the small stuff.

That somehow when you think you just can't cope or deal with things there is a small part of you which somehow finds that push to carry on through the tough times and come out the other end!

That my parents were totally winging it, just like I am now.

I'm a whole lot more forgiving of what I perceive as being "mistakes" they made since having my own child!

That it's not all magical. Some of it is magical and amazing. But some of it is shit, hard work and quite tedious.
But also that those wonderful moments are worth every difficult moment, and then some.
Most of all, I've learned that the love you have for your kids is limitless and sometimes quote overwhelming no matter how naughty they've been

quite overwhelming even!

Well I'm only twelve weeks in, but I've been shocked at how different all the babies I know are. They all have their little quirks.

Also, that all is not as it seems. Partly I know this because when DD is being a little angel and I get compliments I just smile sweetly and let them believe she's always like that. I don't let on that earlier in the day she had a big screaming session!

That there is more than one type of intelligence so don't too hung up on your child's grades.