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Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Twins won't be in the same class...

48 replies

archiealfie · 12/07/2016 17:17

My twins (boys) are going into Reception, but have been put into different classes, on purpose!? Is this normal?

OP posts:
wheresthel1ght · 12/07/2016 17:20

Depends on the size of the intake but yes in most cases it is.

Ime twins often isolate themselves from other kids albeit unintentionally because they have such a close bond that others find difficult to breach. Also by separating them the school are encouraging them to be more independent of each other.

I would see t as a good thing! My friend has twin dd's and would love for them to be separated at school. The shyer one is always overlooked in favour of the more outgoing one and separate classes would have prevented her sister sidelining her

Cadenza1818 · 12/07/2016 17:21

That's good! Mine are together and its not good!

RandomMess · 12/07/2016 17:21

Yes it is. I think it's a great benefit that they won't get lumped together as "the twins". Plenty of opportunities for them to play together at lunch time etc. and time to be apart and develop friendships.

PotteringAlong · 12/07/2016 17:22

Completely normal.

LaConnerie · 12/07/2016 17:22

I don't know about 'normal', but my sister's twins were initially put in the same class, and she ended up wishing they were separate. One of hers is much more shy than the other and lets the other do the talking for her if she can get away with it, so the confident one was (inadvertently) taking over a bit.

A couple of years later the classes were shuffled and they were separated. They hated it at first, but looking back we can all see it did them both the world of good confidence-wise and helped them as 'individuals'.

How do you feel about it though?

chickenowner · 12/07/2016 17:22

Many schools do this. It's so that both twins make friends and develop at their own pace, Also so the dominant one (if there is a dominant one!) doesn't take over.

MidnightVelvetthe5th · 12/07/2016 17:24

Yes it is normal & probably for the best :)

archiealfie · 12/07/2016 17:24

Ah okay. I was just a bit sad as they are really looking forward to school because they will be together (both very shy)

OP posts:
AwfulBeryl · 12/07/2016 17:24

Mine are in separate classes, it's been really good for them. They make their own friends and as others have said they are not seen as the twins.
What are your concerns?

spidey66 · 12/07/2016 17:25

Surely it's better that they're separate, as they'll have their own identity rather than be known as 'the twins?'

AwfulBeryl · 12/07/2016 17:25

Oh x post. Don't worry, there will see each other at playtime.

TheElementsSong · 12/07/2016 17:26

They'll be fine.

AwfulBeryl · 12/07/2016 17:26

My shy twin is now my outgoing one, they change an awful lot at school.

eightbluebirds · 12/07/2016 17:28

If they're both shy this will probably be for the best.

monkeywithacowface · 12/07/2016 17:28

There are boy/girl twins in ds'year that are in the same class and identical twin boys that are in separate classes so I guess it's not necessarily the "norm" and may have been at parents request.

I was always amused that during the reception years the boy/girl twins were referred to by other children as if they were one person. DS always used to say things like "today Katieben did this" or "Can Katieben come to play"

LindyHemming · 12/07/2016 17:36

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TitusAndromedon · 12/07/2016 17:38

Tamba has done quite a lot of campaigning on this. I believe you are entitled to be consulted and express your preference on whether your children should be kept together or separated. It's worth doing a little research if you think they would benefit from being together.

GloGirl · 12/07/2016 17:39

The Usborne book on going to school has twin siblinds who go to school together.

Thought that might be helpful to know

2nds · 12/07/2016 17:40

Single kids must enter class alone so I don't see why twins would be any different. Besides at least they will have stories to tell each other when they get home each day about what happened in class.

LadyLannister · 12/07/2016 17:40

I have boy/girl twins and have requested for them to be in different classes next year. Our school doesn't normally seperate twins so they have been together from Reception to the end of year 3 which, for a number of reasons, I dislike. The main problem has been that my Ds's confidence has plummeted because although he is very academically able, his sister is just that bit better ( and a bit more of a suck up ) so it tends to be dd who gets the most praise/awards etc. He is really resentful of her so the school have agreed to give seperate classes a go in September and I think it will be the best thing all round.

SuburbanRhonda · 12/07/2016 17:42

Obviously, in one form entry schools like ours they are in the same class.

Goingtobeawesome · 12/07/2016 17:48

So silly to say single kids have to be alone so why shouldn't twins.

You should have been consulted imo.

RandomMess · 12/07/2016 17:48

They will still be "going together" emphasise the things they can still do together also speak to the school and ask if there are shared activities etc.

Hopefully their set up means they will do some activities as a year group. If they are both shy it may actually be beneficial to start apart and get friendly with other shy DC and they will have the back up of knowing they can be there for each other in the playground.

blitheringbuzzards1234 · 12/07/2016 17:49

As I've mentioned elsewhere, I'm a twin and my sister and I were thrown together from first days at school. It may have helped us to be more independent and self-confident if we'd been separated. I was the quieter shy one who was a bit bullied by sis. We were always expected to be together, as if we hadn't separate personalities - annoying to say the least. "Where's your sister?" we'd always be asked. We have entirely different personalities and tastes and we're not even identical! It will take adjustment but could be better in the long run.

OlennasWimple · 12/07/2016 17:51

Normal practice, but there may well be significant free flow time between the classes - as well as break times - so they will still see each other a lot at school

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