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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be disappointed that DH doesn't intend to vote tomorrow?

63 replies

NapQueen · 22/06/2016 20:52

I know I could just say "Well if you don't want to give your say then you can't complain at the outcome", but seriously?

I don't even care which way he votes really,when it comes down to it. He isn't a racist, homophobic or xenophile. He is kind and generous and a wonderful father. I would imagine if he did vote he would have jusiltifiable reasons to pick in or out

But to just not vote at all?

OP posts:
Lilaclily · 22/06/2016 20:53

Why isn't he voting ?

I do think people have a right not to vote though

FaFoutis · 22/06/2016 20:54

It depends whether it is because he can't be arsed (YANBU)
Or he can't decide / doesn't agree with either choice (YABU)

BrokenButNotFinished · 22/06/2016 20:54

LTB.

Grin
Original poster
NapQueen · 22/06/2016 20:55

If his argument was "I cannot decide which side I fall on so don't want to commit to one rather than the other", fine.

"I can't be bothered with all that nonsense"

OP posts:
Cynara · 22/06/2016 20:56

Why does it bother you so much? If you want to vote, vote. If he doesn't then it's no-one's business but his own.

Ragwort · 22/06/2016 20:57

I would be disappointed if my DH didn't vote; even though DH and I have totally opposite views, we will both vote and cancel each other's votes out Grin. I think it is disappointing when people 'can't be bothered' to vote'. Sad.

Normandy144 · 22/06/2016 20:58

What are his reasons not to? I have to say that I recently was reminded of why every vote counts in our local council elections last month. The winning candidate won by 12 votes. Turnout was really low, something like 30%. Really felt for the candidate that lost out.

Every vote really does count. It doesn't take long. If he can't make up his mind then just spend a short time online doing some research. Go with his gut. If he does know already who he will vote for and is just being lazy, then I'm afraid I don't know what to say other than give him a great big kick up the backside and drag him along with you!

FaFoutis · 22/06/2016 20:58

Then YANBU, unless he is an anarchist.

KatieKaboom · 23/06/2016 00:56

Is he registered to vote?

My husband will be voting for the first time EVER tomorrow. He's in his forties! I'm quite impressed by his constitutional passion.

In general, though, I'd say that choosing not to vote is a perfectly valid choice.

I never vote in my home country's elections because all the parties are identically cuntish. And I'm not going to incur significant expense and effort to get to a polling booth just to spoil my paper. Smile

KatieKaboom · 23/06/2016 00:57

Re Brexit, the UK is going to be a bit fucked either way, so your husband's apathy seems quite natural to me.

LouBlue1507 · 23/06/2016 01:08

It's your husbands right to choose not to vote if that's what he wants.. He doesn't have to justify his reasons to anyone! YABU!

Pinkheart5915 · 23/06/2016 01:17

Ultimately it's his choice. He has a right not to vote if he doesn't wish too.

TheFairyFellersMasterStroke · 23/06/2016 01:24

Perhaps you could remind him that in some countries people have fought and died for the right to vote, whereas he has the right handed to him on a plate and he is throwing it away.

Even if he just turns up to spoil his paper, it's better than wasting this privilege.

Topseyt · 23/06/2016 02:11

You can't force him, irritating though it is.

ThroughThickAndThin01 · 23/06/2016 02:30

Yabu.

It's his perogative to vote, abstain, spoil his paper as he sees fit.

You should respect that.

Egosumgism · 23/06/2016 04:19

TheFairyFellersMasterStroke

Perhaps you could remind him that in some countries people have fought and died for the right to vote, whereas he has the right handed to him on a plate and he is throwing it away.

Has zero relevance to this situation.

Even if he just turns up to spoil his paper, it's better than wasting this privilege.

Why? To keep some random person on Mumsnet happy?

It's entirely up to him how he votes or doesn't, whatever the case may be.

myownprivateidaho · 23/06/2016 05:10

I can never understand why people see voting as virtuous in itself. There are so many ways to contribute to society.

LittlePeterRabbitAndHisFly · 23/06/2016 05:22

People fought and died for people's right to vote.

They didn't fight and die so people could be forced to vote.

It's up to him to choose.

nomad5 · 23/06/2016 06:07

Is he registered to vote? Would he be willing to cast a vote for this overseas Brit who isn't eligible to vote?!

YANBU, OP!!

malika54 · 23/06/2016 06:14

I'm forcing mine to go! It's too important to miss! He actually sat through a debate the night before last and is reading up on it to make his mind up. Hopefully he has picked a side Grin

OnionKnight · 23/06/2016 06:21

It's up to him really, nobody should be forced.

LadyStarkOfWinterfell · 23/06/2016 06:30

I can't respect people who don't vote. It's ridiculous.

Hereforthebeer · 23/06/2016 06:43

I'd be disappointed with my OH in the same situation.

Its because not voting for those reasons is almost giving up on democracy... And stepping out of society.
We are all part of this, we have very little influence on many day to day things, but when we vote, that is our voice. We're lucky to have a democracy and we should respect it.

NotYoda · 23/06/2016 06:45

He's a fool

I'd be embarrassed for him, TBH

LifeIsGoodish · 23/06/2016 06:52

If you refuse to participate in democracy then you have no right to object when the democratically elected leadership does something you disagree with.