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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Is this my wifely duty?

76 replies

Hereskiddyskiddy · 30/03/2016 11:23

I'm responsible for the laundry in our house, me, dh, dcx2. This morning I found dh's bath towel with skids on it Envy Not only that, it was hanging to be dried to use tomorrow....boak....

Is it my duty to remove and wash, or ltb?
Cheers

OP posts:
Shirkingfromhome · 30/03/2016 11:24

Definitely LTB.

Burgerbobismydad · 30/03/2016 11:25

Lay it on his pillow... In the spare bedroom.

cuntycowfacemonkey · 30/03/2016 11:26

Give it to his mum and tell her she still has some parenting work to do

NNalreadyinuse · 30/03/2016 11:26

Def ltb!

Seriously though, I would wash it (boil wash and on its own), but no it isn't your 'duty' unless he does his fair share of 'shitty' jobs too Wink

HackerFucker22 · 30/03/2016 11:32

How dirty is your DH's arse if he is still getting skids after a shower?

AlisonWunderland · 30/03/2016 11:33

fold it neatly (wearing gloves) with skids showing, and lay it on his side of bed.
Beside it, place a loo roll.

Large note between them:
< towel
loo roll >
They are not the same thing.
Please use loo roll for wiping your arse.
"The Management"

Pollyputhtekettleon · 30/03/2016 11:36

Oh dear, this is the sort of thing that you should keep very quiet about if it only happened once. It's embarrassing for everyone and having half of mumsnet telling you that you live with public enemy #1 will not make you feel justified in your disgust I think. I would quietly put it in the wash and just say to dh to make sure that dirty towels go in the hamper and not back on the rail. If it happened again I'd be telling him what the dirty towel consisted of and asking for it to not happen again.

Katarzyna79 · 30/03/2016 11:38

hacker ROFL id go balistic Op. Tell him tp use a handheld bidet or jug wash his bottom at the toilet shouldbt have nothing on him after a shower!!

Its also a given i do it OP taken for granted. Husband told me not to do his for last 9 months as if thats taken burden off and made it fairer for me . I still have 4 kids and 3 adults minus husband to do. Beds well i do all of them alone too its b.s

rainbowstardrops · 30/03/2016 11:42

Grin at Polly
I'd definitely do the laying it on his pillow with a loo roll next to it! Filthy sod Grin

centigrade451 · 30/03/2016 11:43

I would personally show him his towel and ask him if he thinks it is acceptable and give him a long lecture on cleanliness. If he is going to act like silly child, then I will treat him like one.

I would then ask/make him wash it himself. But since I know he would probably mess that up I would say 'just give it here'.

Beautifulstorm · 30/03/2016 11:46

Some harsh comments on here! It's obviously an accident, I'd day nothing and wash it.

If he's lazy and refuses to help in general I'd be tempted to leave his washing though!

Katarzyna79 · 30/03/2016 11:49

I wouldnt be happybut id savehim the embarrassment quietly wash it.

doesbt happen though bumsxwashed with water at loo

BeaufortBelle · 30/03/2016 11:51

I agree with beautifulstorm. Put some wet wipe thingies next to the toilet. Have a quiet word if it happens again. Meanwhile put on a hot wash. Are you absolutely sure it's his; I mean absolutely sure, are you OP?

molyholy · 30/03/2016 11:55

I hardly think it is the OP's job to lecture her husband on how to wipe his own shitty arse.

Gross.

Shit stains on the towel. For gods sake. Forgivable if it is your young child, but not your husband.

stopfuckingshoutingatme · 30/03/2016 12:03

Give it to his mum and tell her she still has some parenting work to do

ahem #everydaysexism

GastonsPomPomWrath · 30/03/2016 12:04

Crying at Alisons suggestion.

Op please do that.

Branleuse · 30/03/2016 12:05

put it in the washbasket ffs, he probably didnt even realise. How humiliating

CockacidalManiac · 30/03/2016 12:07

Dark coloured towels are the future.

magoria · 30/03/2016 12:08

There is a very good blog out there. I cannot remember it but it is pretty much about a guy whose wife left him for leaving his cup on the top near the dishwasher. He thought it was nothing but every time he did it a small piece of her love died for him as all she saw was a man who thought she was there to clean up and tidy away after him and this is what he thought of her.

Keep the towel. Have a chat about his personal hygiene as his is not cleaning his arse properly and was planning on re-using a shitty towel. Ask him if he really did not notice or if he really just didn't care. I don't get how he cannot personally.

Ask him if this is what he thinks you are there for? To clean up his shit behind him.

EweAreHere · 30/03/2016 12:09

Ewwwwww.

If it was a one off, I'm going to assume he had no idea and possibly has a bit of a tummy bug, and not say something. If not a one-off, I'd say something as it wouldn't be reasonable at all to leave it there for you to deal with.

CheeseGerm · 30/03/2016 12:09

Is this an actual thing? Not wiping your arse before getting in the shower? My OH is a major stinge and has been known to mark the loo roll to check how many squares ppl
use so I can imagine the option of not wiping to save toilet paper would be appealing to him. I just can't imagine the logistics, what do you clean your arse with? You can't use sponge/flannel/loofah you also use on your face, surely?

Pooseyfrumpture · 30/03/2016 12:13

Dark coloured towels are the future

No no for the love of god no - you would never know what you were wiping on what Confused[vom]

unlucky83 · 30/03/2016 12:14

DP used to do this ...it is because (as I saw it described on another thread ages ago) they are using a towel like tooth floss between the cheeks of their arse. When I pointed it out he asked how else he was supposed to dry his crack...
I explained that I am perfectly capable of of having a shower and drying myself adequately with using a towel to attempt to dry inside my anus. It really isn't necessary...
Result - no more skids on towels.

Frika · 30/03/2016 12:16

Jesus, this is not the OP's recently toilet-trained toddler, but an adult man with markedly poor personal hygiene. I'm a bit taken aback by all the tutting 'wet wipes/wash it quietly/the poor man' wifeliness on this thread, as I assume the OP was joking about 'duty'. Our husbandly and wifely duties as regards laundry extend to something like 'whoever is walking past the laundry basket on the landing when it overflows humps it downstairs'.

CockacidalManiac · 30/03/2016 12:16

In defence of men, we do tend to have particularly hairy arses.
I'm not quite sure where I'm going with this.