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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not want threadworms in my home!?

44 replies

Purplerain067 · 25/01/2016 10:43

DPs ExW sent the 3 DSC to us this weekend, even though two of them have threadworms. She only treated the two which have them (5 minutes before DP picked them up) and not the other, or anyone else in her household.

AIBU to think that this is a total disregard to my daughter (4) as well as me and my DP?

I asked DP if he would mind staying at his Mums house as I didn't want my daughter to catch them, he agreed but reluctantly.

On his return I asked DP to take a tablet too, just incase.

His ExW, Mum and even DP to a certain degree are treating it as a common cold and obviously don't realise how contagious it can be.

AIBU here?

OP posts:
shutupandshop · 25/01/2016 10:46

Erm there his children. Yabvu

trixymalixy · 25/01/2016 10:46

You're totally overreacting.

usual · 25/01/2016 10:50

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Whatdoidohelp · 25/01/2016 10:50

They are HIS children! Bloody hell, as said on many a thread, you knew he had kids, these things happen. ExW can't quarantine them from you and your precious girl incase you catch them

Istrianlover · 25/01/2016 10:55

YABU
They are the most common worm parasite in children and affect 50 % of the population. (Boots)

In any group of children under 10 around 40% of children will have them at any one time. You don't need to keep children off school. ( mumsnet info on threadworms)

ReallyTired · 25/01/2016 10:57

I imagine there is a 90% chance there is already threadworms in your house if your step children visit regularly. Does your four year old attend nursery or school? There is a really high chance your four year old already has them. She may have even given the worms to her half siblings.

If you had had a grain of sense you would have welcomed all three children and given deworming tablets to the child who hasn't been treated and your entire family including yourself.

Minisoksmakehardwork · 25/01/2016 10:58

The only thing the exW is unreasonable in is not treating all 3 children. We all had to have medicine/tablets when 2 of our 4 DC got them.

Yabvu to expect the children not to visit because they have a common childhood illness. And if you're that worried, all you needed to do was ensure they used separate towels/flannels and hot wash the dc's bedding after they'd left.

MsJamieFraser · 25/01/2016 10:59

yabu and OTT

ZiggyFartdust · 25/01/2016 11:02

yabvu. It's just worms, ffs, your own kid will probably get them at some point anyway.

Original poster
Purplerain067 · 25/01/2016 11:08

usual no I wouldn't send her away, but I wouldn't risk the 3 DSC catching it by bringing them here either.

OP posts:
ReallyTired · 25/01/2016 11:14

You are just looking for an excuse to stop your partner from seeing his children so you can play happy families and pretend the ex wife and her brood doesn't exist. Those children must feel really hurt.

EnthusiasmDisturbed · 25/01/2016 11:22

Does your dd go to nursery?

There will be children there with worms yucky mucky things will be scratching their bottoms then touching toys that your dd will then pick up and she will do the same thing and round in circles it goes

It's so obviously nothing to do with worms it's to do with you wanting some sort of control

Istrianlover · 25/01/2016 11:22

With 4 children and the frequency of children having threadworms how many times will your DSC will not be welcome in your home each weekend or your DD will have them and you won't be welcoming DSC incase they catch them. How will you monitor this when DD is at school going to parties or mixing with other children.

trulybadlydeeply · 25/01/2016 11:22

Sorry, YABU OP. Threadworms are rife. Your DD will have been exposed to them on a regular basis - school/pre-school/nursery, soft play, friends etc. I would imagine that virtually every day she is at risk of being exposed to them. They are very easily treated and unless the infection is persistent and severe, rarely cause problems.

If they had had something like D&V, it would have been different, but worms? No.

HeadfirstForHalos · 25/01/2016 11:26

Yabu, they are his children. I agree it's just as likely your dd has them and she could have even passed them on to your step children. It's just a normal, if icky part of childhood. Their father is equally as responsible for his children as their mother, whether they have threadworms or not.

Original poster
Purplerain067 · 25/01/2016 11:32

reallytired wow, you have no idea. I actually have a great relationship with all of my DSC, as does my DD.

I have never dealt with worms before and the nhs website states that they can reinfect themselves etc. easily as the medicine only kills the live worms but not the eggs. I was simply thinking that if my DD was to have worms or a similar contagious illness that I would at least ring ahead of time to warn them.

Sorry I am not at peace with parasites, I was thinking of my DSD that didn't have the medicine and my DD. I didn't want a vicious cycle between two households.

Evidently I am being unreasonable and should have made precautions and not worried so much. That is all I needed to hear, not your deluded insight to how my family doesn't work.

OP posts:
ZanyMobster · 25/01/2016 11:32

Wow you are totally unreasonable. Kids catch threadworms, it's not life threatening and are easy to treat.

This sounds like the sort of thing my friend would do, she openly dislikes her step children and their mother and will find any reason to be wound up by something minor like this.

Crumbles12 · 25/01/2016 11:33

They don't advise you keep children off school or nursery with threadworms, and they really aren't that contagious provided they wear tight clothes to bed and wash their hands/bedding carefully. There's a high chance your DC will have or has had threadworms at some point and I'm sure you would hate them to be excluded from anything, that seems very unfair.

ZanyMobster · 25/01/2016 11:34

Sorry x post. It really didn't come across that you had a good relationship with them, apologies.

RubbleBubble00 · 25/01/2016 11:34

Massive overreaction. Its not some horrible infectious disease and def not something you stop Treat all the kids and yourself and dh as precaution. Wash bedding, clean toilet, job done.

Your precious dd will probably get them at school anyway.

differentnameforthis · 25/01/2016 11:36

It's worms, op. I'd rather have to get rid of a dose of worms than headlice, to be honest!

I think you need to relax a bit.

willconcern · 25/01/2016 11:42

Incredibly incredibly unreasonable. Threadworms - take a tablet, they are gone. Will you turn them away if one has nits too? Because that will also happen. Or a cold, or a sore throat. They are your DP's children.

If I were your DP, I would be really angry with you.

Your DP's ex didn't actually have to tell you about this, it's so minor.

willconcern · 25/01/2016 11:43

You could have gone and got tablets yourself, and treated all of your family, including the DSD who hadn't had a tablet before arriving.

kelda · 25/01/2016 11:44

They are his children. Why should they be kept away from him? If he sees them regularly (and I hope he does), then you need to treat your whole household anyway. She did treat them, and informed you of them problem. I really don't see what she did wrong although probably in your eyes she can't do anything right.

If you are concerned about money, some pharmacies give the medication for free due to a special scheme.

VoldysGoneMouldy · 25/01/2016 11:46
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