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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To expect my kids to do one chore before school?

54 replies

TrafficJunkie · 22/01/2016 22:35

Very age appropriate stuff. I'm thinking one could clear away breakfast things, one could feed the animals, one could help put a load of laundry on and the other help unload/load up the dishwasher....

But is it unfair to ask this before school?? When they get home we have a timetable already which is going to include some other light chores such as putting away any clean clothes left on your beds, and helping to lay the table.

I'm about to be single mum to four again, which is why i want to implement some changes, also i dont want them growing up thinking mummy does everything!

OP posts:
Headmelt · 22/01/2016 22:37

How old are your children?

usual · 22/01/2016 22:38

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

VoldysGoneMouldy · 22/01/2016 22:39

I think that may end up being more stressful than it's worth.

Or is it just my house that is crazy as fuck before school?

IMurderedStampyLongnose · 22/01/2016 22:39

That's fine,I would and do expect the same.People expect far too little of children nowadays IMO,and I believe it helps their self esteem to be a contributing member of the household by doing things like this.

camtt · 22/01/2016 22:40

that would be something else for me to get stressed and shouty about - although your children may be better than mine at doing what they are told

DextersMistress · 22/01/2016 22:40

I think making their beds is enough before school to be honest.

Imnotaslimjim · 22/01/2016 22:41

Really does depend on their age - 4/5ish maybe not before school. 7/8 definitely with the small chores you've mentioned. My 8yo and 10yo take out their own dishes, rinse and put them in the dishwasher. They put away their own clothes.

I understand that life is about to become harder, and you're doing the right thing teaching them to help now

cheapandcheerful · 22/01/2016 22:42

Mine have things to do before school but they are things that contribute to us leaving the house on time, and are just considered as part of working as a team rather than 'chores'. So while I make coffee, the dc set the table for breakfast. While I empty the dishwasher, the dc clear the table.

Original poster
TrafficJunkie · 22/01/2016 22:42

They are 5,7,8,9

OP posts:
QuietWhenReading · 22/01/2016 22:42

Agree that it depends on the age group, however making your bed and clearing away the dishes seem pretty appropriate and manageable for any school aged child.

cheapandcheerful · 22/01/2016 22:42

Oh and they're 3yo and 5yo.

Original poster
TrafficJunkie · 22/01/2016 22:47

I like the idea of teamwork.

We seem to have time in the morning... We need to leave at 8.20 but my eldest is always up by 6am, followed by the second around 6.45. They all already get dressed immediately upon waking. Breakfast is at 7.15 but could be earlier, its only so I can squeeze in an extra cuppa. They are done eating and brushing teeth by 7.45/8.00

OP posts:
thelouisee · 22/01/2016 22:48

Pulling the duvet straight and putting dishes in the sink are fine but anything more is a bit much IMO before school.

Fooshufflewickbannanapants · 22/01/2016 23:08

All 6 of mine have jobs before school and after and have done from age of 3 ish. I was a single parent for many years and it helped them to understand that there is no housework fairy ( though they still apparently believe in the loop roll fairy!)
So no yanbu

hownottofuckup · 22/01/2016 23:09

I think that sounds OK actually. Putting a load in, if you've gotten a pile ready the night before, is easy and quick enough. It's the kind of thing my DC enjoy.
And dishwasher sounds a bit of a long winded chore for that time of day but you did say 'help'. Other two tasks are easy.
I'm a SP to 4 DC too and also like the idea of working as a team.

balletgirlmum · 22/01/2016 23:13

My children have from quite a young age always been expected to clear the breakfast table & put their dirty dishes in the dishwasher.

They also have to make their beds.

Katenka · 23/01/2016 07:02

It depends on how much time you have.

I don't expect my dd (11) to do anything but get ready for school on a morning. We leave at 7.50am. Even going to bed 8.30pm she is knackered if she gets up before 7.15am.

So she gets up, washes her face, brushes her teeth, does her hair and gets dressed. Then it's time to go. She eats her toast in the car. She drinks a cup of tea while getting ready.

She does do jobs on an evening as school finishes at 2.30pm so she is home by 2.45pm.

Ds is four so helps me do jobs.

If mornings at your house have time why not?

We are having a new kitchen this year and getting a dishwasher. She will be expected to but her cup in Grin

Can not wait to get a dishwasher!

abbieanders · 23/01/2016 07:05

They should be more than capable of doing those jobs before school. There really is no reason why they shouldn't contribute to the smooth running of the home.

vestandknickers · 23/01/2016 07:07

Sounds a bit ambitious before school. Definitely when they get home though when there's a bit more time.

MangoBiscuit · 23/01/2016 07:24

We have a 2yo and a 6yo. Eldest has to open her curtains, pull her duvet back, clear everyone's breakfast things, take her pyjamas back upstairs after dressing, and sometimes bring down her laundry. We're just starting to teach DD1 how to load the dishwasher (we don't put sharp knives in ours) so the breakfast things will need to be cleared and loaded soon. 2yo has to help fetch things, shoes, things that need to be packed etc. We usually have 90 minutes in the morning. If we had animals, I'd expect both DC to help to some extent, and feeding is usually something that can't wait till after school. If for any reason they're tired, and sleeping in, I let them sleep as long as possible, and do most of it myself.

With 4 DC I think that's an easily manageable amount to do. I also find it easier to fit things in in the morning, as quite often we're not home again till 4:30, or later. If mornings out housework time in your house, then mornings they should muck in too.

Soooosie · 23/01/2016 07:38

We have time in the morning too. Little time at night. Mine make their beds, open the curtains, load/unload the dishwasher, wipe the surfaces, do homework. I like to leave the house semi straight.

Soooosie · 23/01/2016 07:42

It's not optional, however mine get 20p each morning for completing the household stuff plus another 20p for completing homework. I don't give them pocket money and they do bigger weekend jobs without reward.

FayKorgasm · 23/01/2016 07:51

Katenka if you stop her drinking tea she will be much less tired.

Those jobs sound fine OP if theres enough time. Once they get into the swing of things it will just become just like every other thing they need to do in the morning. Good life skills.

Mistigri · 23/01/2016 08:08

It depends how much time you have in the morning.

I don't expect anything of DD as she gets up at 5.50am and leaves at 6.35 (there would be a nuclear explosion if I asked her to get up earlier to do chores), but DS doesn't leave until 7.45 and I expect him to clear up his breakfast things.

Artandco · 23/01/2016 08:10

They are fine. Tbh I wouldn't even classify clearing your own breakfast stuff away as a chore, but something everyone should be doing automatically.
4 and 5 year olds here. ( almost 5 and 6). They do most things from your list

We have two laundry baskets ( white and darks). They have to put all their stuff in the correct ones when taken off. So Dh or I can just grab full one and wash.
They clear away table by scrapping any of own leftovers in bin and leaving plates etc above dishwasher ( we still load atm)
They help with Dinner prep every night as preparing a meal and table is a family event here. Everyone does something according to age.

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