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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU oh wanting to go out..

28 replies

elf0508 · 31/12/2015 18:31

My partner has a friend coming over for tonight but now the friend has suggested going out to a pub.. aibu to be a tad upset? It means I'll be on my own.. might as well go to bed lol

OP posts:
vanillavelvet · 31/12/2015 18:33

Could you go to the pub too? Or do you have DC in the house?

I'd be upset too - especially as it changes the plans at the last minute.

Arfarfanarf · 31/12/2015 18:33

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

rollonthesummer · 31/12/2015 18:36

I take it that you have kids? That being so, your DH will be saying no then!!?

TwatTheNinja · 31/12/2015 18:38

If its a case of you stuck at home because they don't want you tagging along,
or because of dc,

Then yes I'd be pretty pissed off.

littleleftie · 31/12/2015 18:39

If you cannot go because of DC then YANBU and DH should stick to the original plan.

HeartShapedBox · 31/12/2015 18:40

He should be telling his pal no, it's horrible to leave you on your own.

TopHat33 · 31/12/2015 18:42

Yanbu. As PP said. You are either invited and go, or can't because of dc in which case they stay in with you as planned.

magoria · 31/12/2015 18:54

Pretty shitty of your DP changing plans at this late a date if he has agreed leaving you out in the cold.

Says a lot about how he views you.

Iwanttokillthem · 31/12/2015 19:01

Im pretty easy going about my partners social activites. He can go out whenever he likes. Hell, I'll even drive him there -and collect him later :)

But its a definite no to going out alone at Christmas and especially New Year. Its just not right to suddenly contemplate going out with a friend to leave you all alone and it shows a complete lack of respect for you.

Either you both stay in or both go out . No question of it.

formerbabe · 31/12/2015 19:02

I don't think it's a big deal and it wouldn't bother me...I'd enjoy the peace and quiet.

SevenOfNineTrue · 31/12/2015 19:02

Why can't you go to the pub with them?

SantasLittleMonkeyButler · 31/12/2015 19:04

Yes, why can't you go too?

If it's because you have DCs then DH isn't free to go either is he?

HackerFucker22 · 31/12/2015 19:05

Need more info.

Is there a concrete reason you can't go?

VintageDresses · 31/12/2015 19:17

Depends what the plans were for home and as others have said, why you won't be going with them, but on the face of it I'd be pretty annoyed if DH went out without me NYE.

I'd be relaxed about it any other day, even my birthday,if we had plans for the weekend etc, but not NYE.

VintageDresses · 31/12/2015 19:18

Who is the friend and why only his friend? Why weren't your friends coming too?

Original poster
elf0508 · 31/12/2015 19:21

Yeah I've got 18 month old who has just come out of hospital.
My friends haven't bothered with me since 2013, I'm pretty lonely 😢 but thats a while other thread

OP posts:
Topseyt · 31/12/2015 19:22

Have they invited you to go? Are you able to go or do you have children and no babysitter.

I think they should be trying to include you if you want to be included. If you can't go because of children then they should be sticking to the original plan and staying with you. If they are treating it as a normal boy's night out and leaving you to it when you would also like to go out and celebrate New Year then that is rather inconsiderate of them - whether you have children or not.

Topseyt · 31/12/2015 19:26

OK, cross posted. You have a poorly child and they are planning to leave you to you on your own while they go out celebrating as if nothing has happened.

Not fair IMHO, especially if you wanted to celebrate New Year in the only way open to you, i.e. at home because of the childcare issues.

Doubly inconsiderate of them.

Greengardenpixie · 31/12/2015 19:27

I see a row brewing.
No its not right. Yes you have a right to be upset.

formerbabe · 31/12/2015 19:31

Yeah I've got 18 month old who has just come out of hospital.

In that case...yanbu!

Gowgirl · 31/12/2015 19:33

I think the fact you have lost touch with YOUR friends is the problem, maybe try to build a new network in the new year? Yep he's being an arse but I think you would be happier if you had if not friends but at least coffee mates all year round.

yorkshapudding · 31/12/2015 19:35

YANBU.

VintageDresses · 31/12/2015 19:37

No, I have a tendency to play devil's advocate on these threads Blush but I can't see a way that either of them think that's OK.

Arfarfanarf · 31/12/2015 19:38

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ImtheChristmasCarcass · 31/12/2015 19:42

YANBU at all. He's being very inconsiderate if you had a quiet-ish evening planned for you, OH, and friend.

But depending on your OH and his friend, would you rather be with your little one in peace as opposed to have OH and friend there getting drunk and loud and possibly disturbing your DC?

If OH decides to go, I'd be VERY clear with him that you are NOT providing any type of transportation to and/or from and that he damned well better be quiet when he gets home!

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