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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To think you shouldn't win musical statues when you've moved

47 replies

Timri · 17/12/2015 11:25

Just because it's your birthday party?

At a 5yo birthday party, seven kids between 6 and 3 playing musical statues, 4 out already, birthday girl moves, told she is out, starts screaming hysterically, then told by parents no she's not out, carry on with the game...

Was sitting there hysterically trying not to laugh as another mum there told all the the 'out' kids they were back in too then.
Parents of birthday girl didn't look impressed.
What do you think? Am feeling slightly evil thinking it was funny

OP posts:

GastonsPomPomWrath · 17/12/2015 11:28

Yanbu. I would have found it funny too.
Birthday girls sounds like a spoilt little brat.

Original poster

Timri · 17/12/2015 11:45

Birthday girl can certainly be, ahem, spirited
It was the look on their faces though, you could see that they didn't like it at all
All kids ended up getting a prize after they were all in again, game just came to an end

OP posts:

Doublebubblebubble · 17/12/2015 11:46

Yanbu I hate it...

GastonsPomPomWrath · 17/12/2015 11:52

Well I would have been very at that and probably made a loud statement about it too! I am a miserable fucker who can't see any point in letting everyone win. There's winners and losers in lots of things. Bah humbug!

mommy2ash · 17/12/2015 11:53

At every birthday party I've been to the games are in favour of the birthday kid. The other kids accept this graciously and they get their time to win at their birthday. I've never put much thought into it

VagueIdeas · 17/12/2015 11:53

Was sitting there hysterically trying not to laugh as another mum there told all the the 'out' kids they were back in too then.

Hahaha. Good on that mum.

Spilose · 17/12/2015 11:55

Nope, YANBU. I know a few kids with similar parents.

My mum cringes remembering a birthday party I once went to and I won literally every single game and the birthday boy was in tears by the end of the party

DadDadDad · 17/12/2015 12:15

I think that was a good way for the other parent to make a point. It's a mentality I suspect some adults have: because it's my birthday, I should be exempt from anything that upsets or inconveniences me.

I went to see Matilda the musical yesterday, so remembering the opening scene from that gives this thread a particular piquancy.

Original poster

Timri · 17/12/2015 12:15

mommy tbh I think it was more the reaction the parents. Although I can see pass the parcel maybe being geared toward the birthday girl/boy but not a game that has clear rules etc. I was just a bit 'eek' at the situation, then found the sight of the kids being ushered back on to the dance floor really, really funny.

OP posts:

Original poster

Timri · 17/12/2015 12:16

I don't really use the phrase, but 'cats bum mouth' came to mind

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SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 17/12/2015 12:26

I would have found the other mum's reaction funny too!

I used to manage Pass the Parcel, when doing parties for my three (they don't want me to organise their parties any more, but as they are 18, 20 and 22, I guess I can understand that ) - I would make sure every child had had at least one go at unwrapping a layer, but I made sure I knew which one was the last layer (different paper) and I closed my eyes for that one, so the final result was genuinely random. I thought that was fair - and to be fair to them, none of the dses ever complained when they didn't win at their own party.

PirateSmile · 17/12/2015 12:29

DM's phrase 'storing up trouble' springs to mind.

AnnaMarlowe · 17/12/2015 12:37

My DC have understood since they were three years old that the Birthday child doesn't win any games and in fact Mummy will ensure they don't.

If it's your birthday you get presents from your guests and the guests win the prizes.

I would have been unimpressed.

Blacktealeaves · 17/12/2015 12:37

I let the out kids keep dancing but they are out of the competition. Or they can be on "my team" and help spot the movers.

Blacktealeaves · 17/12/2015 12:38

I also thought the b day child shouldn't win tbh. All part of hosting.

CRtester · 17/12/2015 12:40

Exactly what Anna says.

As children we were never allowed to win games at our own parties and I plan to do the same with my dc. I'd be embarrassed to host a party and then give all the prizes to my own family, and not the guests!

emwithme · 17/12/2015 12:49

Hang on, I thought the rule was you didn't win anything at your birthday party? I must admit that I am an old gimmer from back in the day when you only got one present in pass the parcel, not one per person. I need to have words with my mum well, I don't, she's been dead nearly 23 years, but YKWIM

emwithme · 17/12/2015 12:51

CP with lots of people. Thank god it wasn't just me then

Original poster

Timri · 17/12/2015 12:56

Blacktea That's what I do too. The ones that are out come and help me spot who's moved/ was the last to sit down etc.
There's usually light hearted arguments 'No I didn't, yes you did' with lots of laughing.
Much more fun than them just sitting out on the sidelines after!!!

OP posts:

Original poster

Timri · 17/12/2015 12:58

When we were little it was my Nan who tried to make us win all the time at our own parties. My mum was horrified and made sure somebody else 'kept her entertained' while the games were going on

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Mumoftwoyoungkids · 17/12/2015 13:07

Nope - opposite where I live. Birthday child generally doesn't win. They get to be the first "assistant" if it is a magician or stand at the front of the congo or whatever but they don't get to win.

I remember causing ever such trouble at one birthday party when dd was nearly 3. It was a group party so 3/4 birthday girls (of which I only knew one) and 30 plus kids. It was carnage! Anyway we were playing pass the parcel and dig stopped on dd. but she had already won once so I passed it onto the next child. Next thing I knew was the music mum coming diving down to try and change this! It seems that this was the winning parcel. And the child who had won was not just a birthday girl but music mum's birthday girl! She was mortified! Unfortunately by the time she got there birthday girl had unwrapped the present and was clinging on for dear life!

Goingtobeawesome · 17/12/2015 13:13

Given the birthday child probably got lots of presents they should not win everything else. Be gracious and nice and make sure someone else wins the pass the parcel, etc.

Nataleejah · 17/12/2015 13:28

Lame game. Children should be having fun, not getting upset and squabble.

icklekid · 17/12/2015 13:32

This is why children aged 8/9 cried at their class christmas party when they were out! Game carried on and they joined in the next one. Just so sad because they are getting a bit old for this routine. ..

multivac · 17/12/2015 13:44

FFS. Laugh and judge the parents, if it gives you pleasure and a pleasing sense of superiority .... but d'you reckon we need to be describing a 5-year-old we don't know as a 'spoilt little brat'?

Mind you, I suppose you get extra points for not adding 'entitled'...

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