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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To leave him asleep on the sofa?

26 replies

perrita · 20/11/2015 20:32

DH and I had an early start and he's had a long day (12 hours at work). Got to nearly 8pm and he was asleep on the sofa while we were watching a bit of telly. I wake him up to go to bed as I'm tired too, do evening ritual of turning off appliances, letting dogs out and go upstairs. DH says he's coming up. Get into pyjamas, brush my teeth, still no DH. Get in to bed reading for twenty minutes still no DH. Have shouted him twice and he says he's coming but AIBU to just leave him on the sofa? I just don't get why people fall asleep on the sofa, if you're tired just go to bed!

OP posts:

IsItMeOr · 20/11/2015 20:34

He's an adult. Why would you do anything else?

Junosmum · 20/11/2015 20:35

You've tried. If he wakes up cold with a stiff neck he can't blame you!

I'm totally with you on the 'if you're tired go to bed' thing- I hate it when OH nods off on the sofa.

BumWad · 20/11/2015 20:37

Leave him

Scarletforya · 20/11/2015 20:39

Aww, at least throw a duvet over him!

gamerchick · 20/11/2015 20:41

I'm in the leave him camp although I did that once and the husband was not happy

I probably would go and sling a quilt over him though.

MooPointCowsOpinion · 20/11/2015 20:42

Leave him there. I leave my DH, I'm not putting him to bed I do that for the kids, not a grown man.

StepAwayFromTheEcclesCakes · 20/11/2015 21:04

I have often turned tv off and lights and left DH sleeping on the sofa, usually when match of the day is on if that doesn't wake him then tough, I go to bed alone and he comes up if when he wakes up.

TondelayaDellaVentamiglia · 20/11/2015 21:09

I leave mine to get a crick, and am not even kind enough to cover him up.

If he falls asleep watching tv I just go up, leave the lights/tv on, and only let the dogs out if they ask.

tuilamum · 20/11/2015 21:59

My DP fell asleep on the sofa the other night, I woke him up twice but he fell asleep again. When he complained I had left him and gone to bed I just said "I tried what more do you want me to do?"

readyforno2 · 20/11/2015 22:02

Leave him. No cover. You tried. Nothing else you can do.
I shout whisper his name once and if he doesn't get up I starfish

stealthsquiggle · 20/11/2015 22:06

If I were feeling friendly I would throw a blanket over him (not a huge effort - we have a pile of snuggling on the sofa blankets in the sitting room) but I would certainly not hesitate to leave him.

mommy2ash · 20/11/2015 22:08

I would try wake him up but at least put a cover over him. I wouldn't leave anyone in the cold without a blanket

LifeIsChaos · 20/11/2015 22:08

I'd put a cover over him, leave his pillow next to him with a glass of water nearby and a note saying the bed is mine, all mine do not wake me and enjoy a bed all to myself

orlakielyimnot · 20/11/2015 22:10

What's the big deal? So he fell asleep on the sofa. I wouldn't even try to rouse him. Just put a blanket on him and go to bed. What's the issue?

Passmethecrisps · 20/11/2015 22:10

My DH does this all the time. I try to wake him twice then leave him. He sleeps very soundly so it makes no difference to him. He can't help nodding off - he isn't curling up like a cat.

Lightattheend · 20/11/2015 22:13

Readyforno2 I do that too

Whathaveilost · 20/11/2015 22:14

I often fall asleep late into the evening. DH has been in a similar predicament as you. If I haven't come up after a while he comes and gets me. If I mutter something like ' I'm ok here' he gently persuades me to come up. He just strokes my hair and says I'll be more comfortable in bed and won't get a sore back ( as I do if I lay on the sofa to long)

Yeah, I hear the arguments, I'm an adult he should just leave me to it but sometimes it it 'of the moment' I'm too sleepy to move but once I do get into bed I feel better and can settle properly.
Therefore my suggestion is give it one more go, if not throw blanket and make sure he won't get a crick I his neck.

No harm being nice to each other is there?

readyforno2 · 20/11/2015 22:15

Glad someone else does light..
I was beginning to think I was a heartless cow

Annecyinyourpantsy · 20/11/2015 22:15

Blanket over him then back to bed for you. DH would do same to me, if I fell asleep downstairs on sofa it's my responsibility to get myself to bed if I want. I never do mind coz our bed is amazing

CiderwithBuda · 20/11/2015 22:15

He is an adult. Leave him.

DH does this all the time. I can't be bothered trying to wake him. Although it's usually when I've gone up early and he has stayed up to watch tv. I only intervene if tv is loud.

OrangeSquashTallGlass · 20/11/2015 22:15

Chuck a blanket over him then go and enjoy sleeping like a starfish in the middle of your lovely bed.

Mmmmcake123 · 20/11/2015 23:41

Does he have a bad night's sleep on the sofa or is he OK with it?
If he's OK then leave him to it, if not show a lil love and properly wake him to move.
It's just being kind to your partner if he's tired rather than he should know better.

Whathaveilost · 20/11/2015 23:59

All the comments about being tired then you should go to bed aren't really helpful.

Sometimes I've fallen asleep without knowing or being tired. Say I've had a couple of glasses of wine, DH is sat up right on the settee and I've snuggled into is belly, the wood burner is on, without meaning to I've fallen asleep for half an hour and given DH a dead arm!

whois · 21/11/2015 06:50

If I fall asleep when we're watching TV DP will wake me when the program has ended and I go to bed.

I would rather be in bed, but have been trying to stay up to watch something usually!

If be pretty upset if he left the soothing TV on and didn't try to wake me.

exLtEveDallas · 21/11/2015 07:02

I left DD and DH asleep on the sofas last night. They were comfy, they were asleep, I didn't see the point in waking them.

When I came down this morning DD was still there, DH had moved himself to the spare bed.

Their choice. I never wake a sleeping lion.

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