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AIBU?

to ask how many people didn't know they were pregnant?

82 replies

hairbrushbedhair · 04/11/2015 18:13

And for how long? Till birth? First few months?

And what happened? Condom split? Pill failed? Wasn't using any method?

And could it possibly ever happen that someone doesn't know they're pregnant with twins or more?

Sadly it's not me, fertility issues.

OP posts:

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mayhew · 04/11/2015 21:07

Like most midwives, I've met quite a few.
Several who only found out in labour. One on Boxing Day, came via A&e, originally " possible gall stones?"One a breech home birth on Christmas Eve.

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CakeNinja · 04/11/2015 21:10

Me with my first.
Contraception failure for us.
Was very young, had a hard party lifestyle. Pcos and only had yearly periods anyway so didn't notice that I didn't have one.
Any sickness (and I don't remember any) would have been explained by horrendous hangovers.
One day felt a very hard lump in the bath over the left hand side of my stomach. Called in dp as terrified I had a tumour.
Went to Drs next day and he confirmed pregnancy, at least 6 months he said.
Nearly fell off the bed.
Went for a scan and was estimated around 31 weeks (hard to tell at that stage as majority of baby is formed already and they gain weight etc at different rates). 5 weeks later she was born.
Didn't really put on weight and at term was still lighter than the 11 stone I have battled to get back down to after my 3rd dc!
All in all, it was my best pregnancy - no complaints, no over analysing anything, short space of time to get organised.
And family and friends rallied round.

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guajiraguantanamera · 04/11/2015 21:15

I think it is just a dodgy stomach tbh hairbrush, just had a massive carvery!
But reading this thread has made me paranoid..

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Arkkorox · 04/11/2015 21:16

I didn't find out till I was 36 weeks, dd is 10 months old now

Shock of my bloody life.

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StellaAlpina · 04/11/2015 21:26

My mum didn't with me for 3plus months. We talked about it recently as I'm pregnant immediatly started vomiting/feeling faint/achey etc....

Anyway her answer to 'how was the first trimester for you?' was 'Ooh I didn't realise I was pregnant so I had ski lessons and went rock climing!' (grrr I wish!)...Her periods had stopped and she occassionally felt a bit nauseous but she kept getting negative pregnancy tests so she just assumed it was nothing/a combination of stress plus skinniness.

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Artandco · 04/11/2015 21:31

20 weeks with ds2. Ds1 was only 6 months when ds2 conceived so I suppose I assumed any lack of period etc was from breastfeeding baby. Was great actually as you feel pregnancy speeds along

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DieSchottin93 · 04/11/2015 21:50

This thread is making me feel a bit paranoid....

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roughtyping · 04/11/2015 21:55

With DS I didn't know til around 22 weeks, my aunt is a midwife and made me go to the clinic as I had a tiny bump. I was very slim, had irregular periods and continued to have irregular light bleeds throughout.

Currently 40+1 with my second and it's been the longest pregnancy everrrr, have known since around 4 weeks!

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TyrionLannistersShadow · 04/11/2015 22:00

It happened to a friend of mine also. She went to the GP because she was feeling fluey and run down but reckoned it was from partying and working late nights in a pub over Christmas. The doc reckoned sge was about 28 weeks , referred her for a scan the following day where it turned out she was actually 34 weeks. Baby boy born 2 weeks later! She had regular periods all the way through and never put on any weight.

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IHopeYouStepOnALegoPiece · 04/11/2015 22:06

Classics thread mentioned above !

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hedgehogsdontbite · 04/11/2015 22:07

I can understand how someone could not know. With DD I knew straight away and very quickly looked like a beached whale. But I never felt her move.

With DS I didn't know I was pregnant until 12 weeks. I never put any weight on during the pregnancy and wore the same clothes throughout. He was very active.

So I can see how because if DS had been as inactive as DD I'd never have known I was expecting. I'd have thought my periods had stopped because of my age.

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GnomeDePlume · 04/11/2015 22:13

Found out at 18 weeks with DC3. Copper coil, DC3 was born practically clutching the damn thing. We found out I was pregnant at a scan (we thought it might be something serious), DH and I came out and said 'here we go again'. We had a 10 month old and a 4 year old at home.

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Oysterbabe · 04/11/2015 22:20

It's incredible people don't know until labour. I'm 27 weeks and it feels like a have a bag of kittens inside me.

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GreatFuckability · 04/11/2015 22:21

I'm sure I read/watched something where a woman had twins and then a concealed pregnancy within a year that resulted in triplets. Or the other way round.

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MotherOfFlagons · 04/11/2015 22:29

I know of someone who claimed she didn't know she was pregnant until eight months. It's a long story, but having now met her, plus some other stuff, I don't believe it. She is tiny and skinny and has form for burying her head in the sand. I'm just surprised her OH (who informed me of said pregnancy in a shell shocked manner) didn't notice before.

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GigiB · 04/11/2015 22:30

my boobs were like rocks for the first 3 months of pregnancy and if i didn't have a regular pasta intake I felt totally nauseous. I would know.

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Donge13 · 04/11/2015 22:31

I had normal periods and no weight gain with dd2. I firs suspected when couldn't drink a cup of coffee. Had a scan and I was 28 weeks, dd2 was born 5 days later, it was all a tad stressful

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MagickPants · 04/11/2015 22:32

I worked with someone who was travelling from another country. She was a real party hard girl, out every night. Suddenly she said she had booked her flight home and said goodbye to everyone, very little notice, got a place in her home town near her mum. Soon after arriving home she told us she had suddenly discovered she was about 30 weeks pregnant and had had no idea.

I don't think she was lying; I think she know subconsciously but wanted to be near her mum when she found out. She didn't have a relationship, it would have been a ONS, and I don't think the father even knows that baby exists

The baby was gorgeous by the way when he appeared soon after!

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hairbrushbedhair · 04/11/2015 22:46

When I had DS I knew from before implantation - I just couldn't sit down it felt like my coxic was bruised, then about a day later I had really bad tummy pains and thought "implantation is happening" then 2 weeks on the test confirmed it... The coxic pain stayed till he was born

After years of fertility treatment/tracking and disappointment I can tell you exactly when I ovulate and which side but I dream of an unexpected labour and consequent DC2

OP posts:

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spritefairy · 04/11/2015 22:49

No no no no don't start this...i was worried last week but 3 pregnancy tests all say no despite my dh joking that I'm as moody as I was whilst pregnant. Problem is I'm sure I'm late and I keep feeling a flutter... No. No no its all in my head

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QOD · 04/11/2015 22:49

My friend adopted as she was categorically unable to conceive
she'd had her adopted child for 2 weeks when she felt something. A.scan showed she was 19 weeks pg.

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Curioushorse · 04/11/2015 22:52

I have taught children that this has happened to (and where none of us teachers would have guessed either).....

but my favourite story is with a couple of friends who are both doctors. It was also their third child. They only found out when she was about 7 months pregnant. Her weight does tend to fluctuate a bit anyway. They were both definitely really shocked by it, and really embarrassed, as they found out in their own hospital. I believe there was a lot of comedy mockery amongst the staff.

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BrideOfWankenstein · 04/11/2015 23:19

Reading these stories and thinking about 2 weeks off work for fathers. I think they have to book it very early (just vaguely remember). And maternity leave for mothers as well.
How do people go about surprise baby, I wonder?

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FunkyPeacock · 04/11/2015 23:23

My DC were both planned but with DC2 I went for my '12 week scan' to be told I was approx 17 weeks pregnant so clearly had missed a full month at the beginning somehow

I can easily see how someone could get to 5-6 months without realising especially if not ttc and you don't have regular periods

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IndomitabIe · 04/11/2015 23:30

A friend of mine thought she was about 7 weeks pregnant (had PCOS, needed help to conceive DC1).

Midwife had a feel and said she thought more like 16 weeks. Referred for a scan ASAP. Friend told me the story the day after this appointment, and said now that she thought about it, she could feel movement.

She was 22 weeks!
Beautifully healthy DC2 arrived when expected (roughly, given the lack of concrete due date!).

I felt heinous with DC1 and would have thought I was dying if it wasn't so obvious I was pg. DC2 and though I feel much better, I've been bloated since week 5 and bumpy since shortly after. Concealed pregnancies amaze me! (But I don't doubt them)