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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

...to think this is arrogant and patronising?

29 replies

Oobis · 06/05/2015 13:34

A Facebook friend of mine is very politically minded. They have now invited any of their Tory leaning friends to PM them for some sort of private exorcism to convert them to the light. AIBU to think this is arrogant and dismissive? The implication from the post is that if you have different political opinions, you are a) less intelligent or b) less well informed.

I thought people were entitled to opinions!
NB this person is a teacher by trade, which is another reason I disagree with the voting age being reduced to 16. What an opportunity to increase your voting power!!

OP posts:
Nabootique · 06/05/2015 13:44

Ugh. YANBU. I resent anyone trying to convert me to anything.

BreconBeBuggered · 06/05/2015 13:46

They can always invite him to fuck off if they don't fancy the lecture, can't they? That's what I'd do if anyone tried to lure me in for a spot of proselytising.

They won't be allowed to convert their pupils in the same way.

RonaldMcDonald · 06/05/2015 13:52

I suppose they are doing this to try to speak to people who they think might be otherwise led by the nose of the Murdoch news empire or the Daily Hell
Perhaps they sincerely don't want to see terrible things for the country in their view and think it is a thoughtful or helpful thing to do

I had quite a few friends who voted Lib Dem and bitterly regretted it. I wonder if offered this service then how much they might have regretted not taking it

ArcheryAnnie · 06/05/2015 13:58

So - you know people who are interested in politics and are trying to bring their friends around to agreeing with them with discussion. Is this not how politics in a democracy works?

If people don't want to discuss this or argue, then nothing is making them. They still get to vote however they like. They are still entitled to whatever opinions they like.

YABU, and you don't appear to understand how democracy - or indeed normal human communication - works.

IKnowIAmButWhatAreYou · 06/05/2015 14:04

Is this not how politics in a democracy works?

If discussion is on the cards rather than broadcasting of views, then maybe.

But the method & medium seem a bit strange to me..

hedgehogsdontbite · 06/05/2015 14:06

I thought it was funny.

Jessica2point0 · 06/05/2015 14:08

Is it definitely not a joke? I'm offered to steer friends away from 'the dark side' when they agree with one political party, and I've equally been told 'if you understood you'd agree with me'. But its all light-hearted and jokey, so I don't think it's offensive.

Besides that, don't most people think that their political opinions are right, and that others are wrong? Part of politics is debating the issues and trying to change minds. Everyone is entitled to their opinions but that isn't the same thing as saying "all opinions are equal". Some opinions are, frankly, ridiculous. DP, for instance, seems to think that Corrie is crap. That's his opinion, but its clearly wrong!

Also, just because she's a teacher wanting to engage with other adults about political issues does not mean that she is necessarily trying to sway her students. Some people (myself included) take the 'position of trust' idea very seriously indeed. My students are currently trying to guess who I'm voting for, and getting somewhat annoyed that I won't tell them. It's not a secret, most family / friends know, but I teach some people who will be voting so don't think its appropriate to tell them.

Original poster
Oobis · 06/05/2015 14:32

Fair play to you Jessica! I bet by keeping them guessing, you're increasing their interest too ;-)
This is definitely not a joke post, this is a "my way is the only correct way and I am willing to correct you" type post. I'm all for healthy debate and also for a bit of banter but this was neither of those things, which is what I disliked. I'm happy for people to have differing political ideas, in fact that's healthy and good.

ArcheryAnnie - I do understand how democracy works thank you. It's about people making decisions for themselves, not being bullied into conforming to someone else's. Ideally those decisions are informed ones, but even this in itself is not enforceable. One could vote for one's favourite colour, a nice sounding name, someone who owns a cat or anything. And that is your democratic right.

OP posts:
shewept · 06/05/2015 14:38

I don't see how its any different to alot if the threads here.

There has been loads of posts talking about how 'if you vote for 'x'...you clearly don't know what you are talking about/ haven't looked at the policies / woefully misinformed'

Which is also arrogant and patronising.

Morelikeguidelines · 06/05/2015 14:41

Surely their friends can just say no, or even "f* off you twat" if they don't fancy it?

Don't think she is U to invite them.

I don't agree with lowering the voting age, as I don't think (most) 16 year old have the maturity to decide.

ArcheryAnnie · 06/05/2015 14:42

How is anyone being "bullied" by this, Oobis?

It's a secret ballot, and people are allowed to share their opinions beforehand. Nobody is being made to engage with them, and you are making a massive fuss about nothing.

Happynow · 06/05/2015 14:43

Umm, brought up to believe it was bad form to discuss politics. But for what it's worth, still believe Tories are generally dull, unintelligent people.

CarryOnCramping · 06/05/2015 14:49

She's made herself sound like a bit of a dick but I don't think it's that big a deal. She's not forcing anyone to do anything. People get pretty passionate about politics.

VelvetRose · 06/05/2015 14:59

I think that's arrogant too OP.

ollieplimsoles · 06/05/2015 15:00

I'd pee myself if I saw one of my friends had put this on their facebook, I have a few friends on their who I know would be serious about it too Grin

Original poster
Oobis · 06/05/2015 15:12

I think that the suggestion that someone else's considered opinion is less worthy than your own is on the bullying spectrum. I disagree with plenty of people who I still manage to respect and vice versa.

I'm not against politics being discussed, just the implication that differing views indicate differing intellect.

OP posts:
Prole · 06/05/2015 15:22

History teaching does tend to be selective - doesn't the victor generally write it? If you were, for instance, taught about Churchill purely in terms of WW2 you might think he was a great statesman. If you were taught about him in terms of the Black and Tans or the General Strike you might think otherwise. If you were taught both then you'll form your own opinion?

Since children do not necessarily follow their parents' politics, I'm sure a teacher's ideological position is even less influential.

ArcheryAnnie · 06/05/2015 15:24

Do you respect Nigel Farage, Oobis? I think almost all of his opinions are less worthy than mine. Am I bullying him by saying so?

Micah · 06/05/2015 15:27

At least there's a chance she'll shut up a bit after the election.

Unlike that forever living shit I'm constantly invited to.

fiveacres · 06/05/2015 15:39

Exactly shewept.

DressedUpJustLikeEdie · 06/05/2015 15:45

YA SOO BNU!

I was just about to start a thread myself about a similar thing. Three of four of my very vociferous Labour supporting friends have gone a little OTT recently on the political ranting and the anti-Tory and anti-UKIP facebook memes and all the very menacing/scaremongering rhetoric. If they are hoping to persuade any fence-sitters at this stage they are going totally the wrong way about it and are starting to sound like a bunch of shrieking harpies to be honest. It smacks of fear and desperation. This shouldn't be about how awful one party's policies are, but about confidence in how strong your own parties policies are. If you have really strong policies that people understand and identify with and want to vote for then you shouldn't need to invest all your time and energy into smearing the competition. And it seems to me that that is all these very strident Labour supporters ever do. It tells me they have little confidence in their own party's policies and abilities.

It's a democracy. Stop shouting at me. You take your vote, I'll take mine, let's see what happens.

Why is it only ever labour voters that do this? Confused

I have friends across most if not all political spectrums, most of them are pretty moderate (or just quiet) to the point where I'm not even 100% sure who they vote for, and others are a bit more obvious/vocal in their leanings, but it's ALWAYS the Labour voters that go in for haranguing and berating and the belittling of anyone who doesn't agree with them, and assuming that they are either completely evil or of very low intelligence.

DressedUpJustLikeEdie · 06/05/2015 15:45

three OR four

Prole · 06/05/2015 15:49

Oobis - considered and informed opinion is always welcome in a democracy. Ignorant opinion is less worthy. The views of most of the far-right do indicate "differing intellect".

Takver · 06/05/2015 15:55

DressedUpJustLikeEdie - do you not think it might just be the people you happen to know? My facebook feed is full of people exhorting everyone to vote Green - it doesn't lead me to assume that the whole country is full of militant eco-warriors Grin.

Takver · 06/05/2015 15:56

Not that I'd mind if it was, of course

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