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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to think this is inappropriate?

32 replies

SweetValentine · 01/03/2015 09:54

It's my DHs birthday today and I've saved up cards that were posted during the week. He received the one pictured and i have to admit to being a little bit offended...

DH is as confused as i was by why someone would send it (he's not that sort of page 3 bloke at all!). We had our 3rd baby just before Christmas so i guess i find it pretty weird to send someone a sexy/fantasy card when life is anything but!

As for who sent it, there was NO writing inside!! Confused going by the handwriting on the envelope and the fact that no friends of ours post cards really i think it was his Mum who had a senior moment and forgot to write in it Hmm

Just odd all round. AIBU to think someone should know better when our baby is only 11 weeks old? He only has 4 cards, its not like i can shove it to the back of the mantlepiece Angry

OP posts:
Joyfulldeathsquad · 01/03/2015 09:57

But strange for his mum to send that type of card? Call her and see if she sent it. Maybe some one sent it as a joke?

Bin it.

ahbollocks · 01/03/2015 09:58

Oh lord! Thats a horrible card. Has his mum got form.for that kind of card?

DoJo · 01/03/2015 10:04

AIBU to think someone should know better when our baby is only 11 weeks old?

I'm not really sure how the age of your baby makes it more or less appropriate, but I agree that it's not the kind of card I would necessarily want on display in my house.

TywysogesGymraeg · 01/03/2015 10:05

YABU to be offended. But YANBU to be mystified. If a small thing like a slightly dodgy birthday card offends you, you must have a pretty sheltered life!

CinnabarRed · 01/03/2015 10:06

I'd be wondering about early stage dementia, if my Mum sent that to DH, especially without writing in it.

Original poster
SweetValentine · 01/03/2015 10:16

I'm just feeling slightly sensitive i guess, still new baby hormonal. It's bonkers! No she doesn't have form for that sort of card, they're normally some kind of cheap teddy ones. She's visiting soon I'll double check it was her!!

I am boggled.

OP posts:
InfinitySeven · 01/03/2015 10:21

DP got a card like that last year, but inside the lady was topless. His friend, who knows us both well, had sent it.

I raised my eyebrows and left it for him to put up, which he didn't.

seaoflove · 01/03/2015 10:21

My nan has dementia, so my first thought is that his mum might be going a bit dotty, firstly for choosing such a strange card, but also not for writing anything in it. The age of your baby doesn't have anything to do with it, because it doesn't seem like much thought has gone into it.

HouseWhereNobodyLives · 01/03/2015 10:21

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

CrystalCove · 01/03/2015 10:48

Very puzzling! Not sure what the link is between having a new baby and someone sending a so-called "sexy" card to your DH though.

Original poster
SweetValentine · 01/03/2015 10:54

When you're feeling leaky, bleeding and bloated and vommited upon i just think it's weird to have a 'sexy lady' card out and about.

OP posts:
Blu · 01/03/2015 10:55

Maybe his Mum got two cards mixed up and somewhere a man you know nothing about is opening a naff-teddy-card in which she has written 'you'll always be my little boy' and is having a crisis over his manhood..... Wink

firesidechat · 01/03/2015 12:31

I'm sorry but the age of baby is irrelevant. It is inappropriate at any time to send a card like this unless there is some sort of in joke that you all know about.

Original poster
SweetValentine · 01/03/2015 14:09

it was an intentional card from the MIL, no further signs of dementia though. ..

OP posts:
HouseWhereNobodyLives · 01/03/2015 14:18

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Yambabe · 01/03/2015 14:22

Reading that I would have thought that you would open it to find a picture of Pele or some other famous Brazilian inside.

Was there?

WorraLiberty · 01/03/2015 14:27

It's a tacky card, it was weird that there's no writing, but I'm not sure how you can make a card sent to your husband, about you and your baby?

If it was sent to you, then I'd say you had a point.

Karma1981 · 01/03/2015 14:27

I understand what you mean about having a new baby and having a card that can make you feel inadequate and maybe a little insensitive given the timing.
But as your husband is not gorging at it and making any comments I wouldn't worry about it.
I think it would only bother my if my hubby was making a big deal out of it (I have a 19 week old) and making digs about how you look after having your baby Iyswim.
Yes very poor taste but I really wouldn't waste anymore time thinking about it.

BarbarianMum · 01/03/2015 14:32

My dad has form for seriously awful cards. He places ' value' before 'taste' or 'appropriateness' and has dug up some truly dreadful, obnoxious things from the bargain bin. Maybe it was on special offer?

KoalaDownUnder · 01/03/2015 14:41

Wait...so it's confirmed, his mother sent it to him?

I assumed a joke card from a mate. It's tacky and crap from a mate, but from his mum it's just bizarre!

Ledkr · 01/03/2015 14:45

Can you send her an equally inappropriate card for her birthday?
You could ask mumsnetters to seek out the best ones.

ThereIsACarInTheKitchen · 01/03/2015 15:22

Assuming that really is from his mum, that is a really weird card for someone to send to their son...

ambientolf · 01/03/2015 15:54

I wouldn't be offended. I don't think it's a personal dig at you but it's just tacky. I would just laugh it off to be honest!

haggardoldwitch · 01/03/2015 16:34

When DH was in hospital my very straight laced MIL took him 'Mens Magazines'. Both DH & I were very Confused and even more so when she told us she'd been to Smiths to buy them.

Don't be offended Op, put it down to bad taste.

emms1981 · 01/03/2015 16:49

Is this the one that has a picture of a man inside? My brother bought my dad it, I found it funny. You are being silly imo