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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To make DS go to school without any breakfast?

73 replies

Rollergirl1 · 11/12/2014 08:23

DS (6) has been very difficult this morning. He didn't want to eat the cereal I put in front of him claiming that he wasn't hungry. In actual fact it was because he wanted to do something else. I repeatedly told him that he wouldn't be getting anything else and if he didn't eat he would be hungry. He kicked up such a fuss and took so long that the cereal is now soggy and inedible. He wants something else. I have said no.

DH just so happens to be here this morning. He says I can't send him to school without any breakfast but I think that if he does than he'll learn not to muck around like this again. I do feel bad but I really don't want to give in.

So AIBU?

OP posts:
SpringBreaker · 11/12/2014 08:24

Give him another bowl of cereal or toast. He is only 6.

Ringovandingo · 11/12/2014 08:24

I'd give him something but nothing exciting! Slice of toast and a banana or something?

SaucyJack · 11/12/2014 08:25

You're not making him go to school without breakfast.

You made him breakfast. He chose not to eat it.

YANBU.

SaucyJack · 11/12/2014 08:26

Unless it was 4p porridge, in which case YABVVVVU.

Mammanat222 · 11/12/2014 08:26

He should have something. Yoghurt and banana?

I get your point but he needs his breakfast.

Hmmm2014 · 11/12/2014 08:27

Can't he have a choice as to what cereal he eats? Maybe give him some ownership/control over his breakfast & this issue may go away.

LittleRedRidingHoodie · 11/12/2014 08:27

He will get fed at school of he says he's not had breakfast which might be even more of a treat. And they will worry about what's going on at home. I'd ring school. Say he's not had breakfast because he refused, and put some breakfast bar or something not overly exciting in his bag (and tell the teacher) so if he gets hungry he's got something

mytartanscarf · 11/12/2014 08:27

I've never eaten breakfast - is it really that essential? I know people say "most important meal of the day" but it's not like he's starved (I presume, since you gave him cereal he didn't eat!)

splodgeses · 11/12/2014 08:28

YANBU! My dd used to do this and it wasn't until I let her 'have her own way' and go to school with no breakfast, that she decided she would rather just eat it.

Just make sure you tell teacher/ta that he was playing up and refused breakfast, saves trouble later on.

SpringBreaker · 11/12/2014 08:29

Tartan, its essential to a child who has probably not eaten for over 12 hours.

Wolfbasher · 11/12/2014 08:29

I'd pour him a new bowl of cereal, but not make loads of other stuff.

mytartanscarf · 11/12/2014 08:30

I don't ever remember having it since being really tiny - definitely not by the time I started school. I doubt any teachers would have been concerned though!

MonstersBalls · 11/12/2014 08:30

I'd offer him a new bowl of the same cereal if he wants it. I wouldn't offer him anything else though.

mytartanscarf · 11/12/2014 08:31

But I can see the point that if he's used to eating something in the morning he'll be hungry.

I'm hungry if I eat something biggish later on at night; can never quite work that out!

Original poster
Rollergirl1 · 11/12/2014 08:31

He does usually have a choice over his cereal but not today because he spent ages faffing around in his room and wouldn't come down after I asked him lots of times.

I have offered him a yoghurt but he doesn't want that.

OP posts:
HoraceCope · 11/12/2014 08:36

piece of fruit or a carrot?

AdventCaroline · 11/12/2014 08:40

Did you ask him what he wanted for breakfast before putting it in front of him?

I think since you made such a big deal over not giving anything else you will have to stick by it.

I'm sure he'll be fine.

But if it was me, I would have said early on "OK, you don't have to eat the cereal, but you must eat something, so will you eat x instead." and make the choice between two things.

I think everyone is entitled to a little bit of choice over what they eat. If he wouldn't eat either then fair enough, and he'd have to go without anything.

happystory · 11/12/2014 08:46

He's six, he shouldn't go to school withouth breakfast.

Original poster
Rollergirl1 · 11/12/2014 08:47

It wasn't about what what was put in front of him. It was because he didn't want to stop doing what he was doing to eat breakfast. He started off saying that he wasn't hungry and didn't want anything.

DH has taken them now. He has a cereal bar with him that he can eat in the car. But DS will be really happy with that and see it as a treat so not sure what he'll have learnt from this.

OP posts:
checkeredpresent · 11/12/2014 09:57

I would not have given him anything else, but made sure his playtime snack was larger than usual.

I would expect him to faff around again tomorrow in the hope that he will get another cereal bar.

My kids come home from school hungry but sometimes they have left part of their school snack. They can eat that before anything else. I hate wasting food! They complain that I am mean.....whatever.

EatDessertFirst · 11/12/2014 10:45

My 4 year old DS refused breakfast this morning. I had asked him what he wanted, put it in his favourite bowl and put it in front of as I do every day. He suddenly decided he wasn't hungry so I told him, calmly, to get down and he wouldn't get anything else. Debate over. We continued our morning.

Like a pp said, its our job to provide it, their choice to eat it.

NoSundayWorkingPlease · 11/12/2014 10:50

because he spent ages faffing around in his room and wouldn't come down after I asked him lots of times

Yabu.

He's 6. If you call once, give it 30 seconds for them to respond/appear. Call again and if they still don't move then go up to the bedroom, take him by the hand and bring him down.

Do you really just faff about downstairs, calling and calling and letting him ignore you?

Cocolate · 11/12/2014 10:55

I make my kids chocolate and banana on toast if they won't eat cereal. It's the one meal I think they need and mostly they do eat sensible porridge breakfasts but I think if they're faffing and fussing then then can have anything just so they have something in their tummies - my theory is that they'll cope better with a bit of food in them.
So I would say YABU

PortofinoVino · 11/12/2014 10:58

Absolutely right, OP. Give him nothing else. He will learn valuable lessons: if he doesn't eat he goes hungry, and you mean what you say.

solidussnake · 11/12/2014 11:06

i've never eaten breakfast either. I drank tea in the morning! Grin
he'll be fine. if my mum kept telling me i WILL eat this, or i WILL eat that i'd have starved... the only thing I would eat as a child is pasta!