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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not offer to pay tutor for missed session?

47 replies

ILovePud · 09/12/2014 17:14

My kids have a tutor on a Tuesday, I completely messed up and forgot that they are at a school event tonight. I rang the tutor, who is lovely, reliable and great with the kids as soon as I remembered this afternoon. She's going to ring me back and see if we can reschedule for later in the week. If we can't should I offer to pay for the missed session? We don't have a written contract so I'm looking to see what the consensus is on what to do.

OP posts:
TakingTheStairs · 09/12/2014 17:16

I think you should offer to pay. It's not her fault you forgot.

goodgollymisspolly · 09/12/2014 17:16

Yes you should - her time is a commodity, it wasn't her fault that the session didn't go ahead.

meHoHoHoverhere · 09/12/2014 17:16

Of course you should!

SoonToBeMrsB · 09/12/2014 17:17

Of course you should pay, it was your mistake.

ilovesooty · 09/12/2014 17:18

Of course you should offer to pay.

ilovelamp82 · 09/12/2014 17:18

I would pay her. If you can't do it another time this week, you could always see if you could arrange it for another time but if not I'd say you need to pay her regardless.

LIZS · 09/12/2014 17:18

your mistake , yes you should pay for her time and be glad she even offered to try to reschedule instead.

wheresthelight · 09/12/2014 17:18

definitely!!!! you have left her no time to arrange alternative work. she may decline to take it however ywbvvu to not even offer

Mrsmorton · 09/12/2014 17:18

You should pay.

LovleyRitaMeterMaid · 09/12/2014 17:19

Of course you pay! Why don't you have an agreement or contract that's covered all this?

apotatoprintinapeartree · 09/12/2014 17:20

Yes, you should pay, not just offer.
It isn't the tutors fault you forgot and you booked their time.
It doesn't matter if you have a contract, how much they like your kids, they have a business and also need to pay mortgage, bills and eat.
It is also close to their xmas too.

ohdearitshappeningtome · 09/12/2014 17:21

Yep. It would be pretty shitty if you didn't. It's your fault you didn't remember!

If she didn't turn up I wouldn't expect you t to pay

Sn00p4d · 09/12/2014 17:21

You should, having tutored and been cancelled at the last minute I didn't get paid. Have to say I was not best impressed.

ohdearitshappeningtome · 09/12/2014 17:21

I mean if it was her error she didn't turn up then you wouldn't pay.

You need to make. Formal contract with her

londonrach · 09/12/2014 17:22

You should pay. Tutor could have seen someone else in that time and lost money.

Original poster
ILovePud · 09/12/2014 17:24

Ok consensus seems to be that I should offer to pay which was my first instinct. Is it usual to have written contracts with tutors? she didn't suggest this and I don't think any of my friends' kids' tutors have formal contracts. If we can rearrange for later in the week do you still think I should offer to pay?

OP posts:
dancingwitch · 09/12/2014 17:25

Of course you should pay. She provides a service, was available for you but you chose not to use her. I got the time wrong for DS' swim lesson the other day so we got there as it finished rather than as it started and, whilst it was galling to hand over the money as another child got in, it didn't occur to me not to pay her. Yes, it is a one off for you to forget but imagine how it would be if one person forgot every night this week and didn't pay her.
On the other hand, if she cancels a session and you don't have a contract then I wouldn't expect to pay.

WeAllHaveWings · 09/12/2014 17:25

Agree, You should pay

Alphonso · 09/12/2014 17:26

Well, she should have made it clear at the outset, really, so in a way it's her look out if you don't pay. But had she gone with a written or clear verbal contract I'm sure she would have specified that she would charge for same day cancellations. Most one to one tutoring/counselling/lessons arranged on a pay as you go basis assumes that payment is made in these circumstances as the person has put that time aside for you so it's not like they can offer the session to someone else. I think you should definitely offer to pay her. I hope she'll be able to rearrange though.

FlorenceMattell · 09/12/2014 17:28

We missed a music lesson last week, like you I completely forgot Dd had theatre ticket that day. We paid, wouldn't have occurred to me not to do so.
A contact can be verbal legally or any emails you have booking lessons.

Surreyblah · 09/12/2014 17:28

Obviously you should pay. If she reschedules in the same week that is very good of her. People often don't have contracts with terms on this because they are in the weaker economic position. Have seen it with cleaners too. All the more reason to behave fairly.

wavesandsmiles · 09/12/2014 17:29

You shouldn't "offer" to pay - you should pay. If the lesson cannot be rescheduled then take the money from this missed lesson along to next week's lesson, or drop it round in the interim. Many tutors with formal contract arrangements charge per term to avoid this kind of thing) and those that don't, and take weekly payment, rely on people being decent and paying if they miss a lesson.

kim147 · 09/12/2014 17:30

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TestingTestingWonTooFree · 09/12/2014 17:30

I think if you reschedule, you should pay for that session. If you can't, then I think you should pay for the missed one. I don't think you necessarily have to pay twice.

RobotLover68 · 09/12/2014 17:33

I'm a squash coach and don't have written contracts - a client kept me waiting around the other day as he'd forgotten to bring his son - he paid me for my wasted time

YABU

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