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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

AIBU to feel weird about this?

36 replies

lilyw · 27/04/2014 16:23

I am feeling a bit weird about something that happened yesterday. I spent the weekend staying at my sister's house looking after her DCs while she was on a work trip. Her elderly neighbour recently died and so there are workmen clearing out the house.

Her kitchen window overlooks the neighbour's garden so we were very aware of them being there as they were constantly walking in and out of the house. They started a huge fire in the garden (right next to my DS's wall) and were burning doors and other furniture.

We were all in the kitchen (me, and the DCs aged 6 and 9) when I glanced out of the window and saw one of the workmen come into the garden, face away from our window and get his privates out in full view of me and the DCs. He then proceeded to relieve himself against the wall, shake it off very obviously and carry on like nothing had happened.

This has freaked me out and the children were asking questions too. I feel like it isn't right to do this in full view of other people (particularly young children.) Am I right to feel like this?

OP posts:

littlewhitebag · 27/04/2014 16:29

I would imagine he didn't know you were there. Could he see you? It's not a great thing for him to done but i am sure your children are at an age where you could tell them that it's not the done thing.

This may be an odd question but were they non English men? I only ask as some Polish men used to congregate after their work near my office and have a few cans of beer. They caused no problems but one day one moved away from the group, turned away slightly and peed. I had full view of everything from my desk. I work with the Police and i was told this is normal behaviour for Polish men as they see it quite a lot. I have absolutely no idea if this is true though.

Original poster

lilyw · 27/04/2014 16:31

Thanks for your reply. Yeah it was really obvious that we were there as you can see right in the window and he couldn't have not noticed us.

I'm not usually precious about this sort of thing but was a bit taken aback! I am not sure if they were English. Perhaps they could have been Polish as he didn't seem to think anything of it.

OP posts:

Fooshufflewickbannanapants · 27/04/2014 16:32

If he faced away from your window how did you see anything? Anyhow yes you are it's just a willy having a wee it's not pleasant but your children won't be scarred for life

NigellasDealer · 27/04/2014 16:33

Polish guys do that kind of thing a lot IME
stick your head out of the window and shout 'spierdalaj'

Writerwannabe83 · 27/04/2014 16:33

When I first read this I assumed 'relieving himself' to mean he had masturbated I was quite amused to think of a guy wanking against the wall and then just 'shaking it off'

That would definitely have been inappropriate!!

startwig1982 · 27/04/2014 16:34

I'm not sure that someone having a pee outside would bother me tbh. Plus surely your kids are old enough to understand it was just a man having a pee? I can't say I understand the fuss.

Original poster

lilyw · 27/04/2014 16:35

Haha no, I meant weeing! Didn't think of that!

I haven't mentioned it to my sister (who can be a tad overprotective) and I think it's the sort of thing she might be upset about - particularly as her DD has only just turned 6 and is very sensitive. Hopefully the kids won't mention it to her...

OP posts:

Tinks42 · 27/04/2014 16:35

Why would it mean they were polish? I personally would laugh, oops! I saw your willy, I wouldn't be particularly unsettled by it.

YoureBeingASillyBilly · 27/04/2014 16:36

Why on earth didnt you roar at him as son as you saw what he was at? You just let him carry on knowing the kids could see!

Pagwatch · 27/04/2014 16:36

Of course you felt uncomfortable - it doesn't matter what nationality they are!

I would knock and ask to see whoever is in charge on site and say 'if your workmen wave their penises around outside my window again I'll phone the police and get you shut down.'

A discreet pee right at the end of the garden is fine. Full frontal peeing by your window is not.

JeggingsHateMe · 27/04/2014 16:38

He came into your sisters garden and pee'd?

BillyBanter · 27/04/2014 16:39

I don't understand if he was facing away from you then he didn't get his 'privates' out in front of you.

It's a bit uncouth but I'm not sure there is more to it than that.

fluffyraggies · 27/04/2014 16:41

His privates weren't in full view then - he faced away from you.

Not nice pissing up walls, but easy enough to tell the kids he couldnt use the toilet in the house as it isn't working or some thing. Might even be true if the water's turned off.

You see blokes pissing at the side of the motorway all the time. It's so obvious what they're doing even facing away from the road. Not really 'freak out' material though.

WorraLiberty · 27/04/2014 16:44

It's quite common for builders/workmen to piss in the gardens of the homes they're working on.

It saves them having to remove their boots/dirty overalls before entering the house.

If he faced away, he probably had no idea you could see him.

FunnyFoot · 27/04/2014 16:44

I wouldn't worry too much it sounds like he did the deed then put his little fella away. It's not like he dragged the process out in wild hope you would vault over the fence and immediately tell him how well endowed he is.

I know peeing in the street is an offence but is peeing in your garden or a garden of a dead persons?

NigellasDealer · 27/04/2014 16:45

also how can he have been facing away from you yet had his penis in full view? was he incredibly well hung?

Tinks42 · 27/04/2014 16:47

He also might be working on a house where its being gutted and hence there isn't a toilet to use.

Tinks42 · 27/04/2014 16:48

Laughs at Nigella.... come on op do tell? what size was it?

AuntieMaggie · 27/04/2014 16:50

TBH I'd be more worried about what they were burning - was it painted/varnished doors and furniture?

Pagwatch · 27/04/2014 16:51

at Nigella

WorraLiberty · 27/04/2014 16:55

I now have a mental image of the OP trying from all angles, to get a good look through the hazy smoke

Pagwatch · 27/04/2014 17:00

Worryingly I have an image of The Urinator with a python like penis.

NigellasDealer · 27/04/2014 17:02

me too - and the urinator also has a big tache like a Gdansk dock worker

PlantsAndFlowers · 27/04/2014 17:07

If you couldn't see his willy then he was absolutely not 'in full view'. It's a bit odd but not something to feel really weird about.

Original poster

lilyw · 27/04/2014 17:10

Noo I wasn't trying to have a look! He kind of took it out in view of us and turned at angle that was slightly away from us, but we could still see it from that angle if that makes sense. Just thought he could have gone somewhere further down the garden and not directly in front of the window.

You are making me laugh though. I hope he didn't have a python penis (it didn't seem that way anyway!!)

OP posts:

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