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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To say it's me or the TV?

33 replies

Linus33 · 23/02/2014 09:51

Our TV broke recently but as it was within a 5 year warranty period the retailer had to replace it as they couldn't repair it. Rather than replacing it for the same size my DH used the opportunity to go from a 37 inch to a 47 inch TV! This TV has taken over the whole room, which I think is a hideous monstrosity.

Now, my DH is a good man and father and pulls his weight with the home etc but this really has got to me. I really didn't have a voice in the matter and the deal was done. So, when he asked me to help in in with the box, which needed 3 people to manhandle, I asked him to take it back which he's refused because it was a great deal.

How do I handle this? AIBU to demand it's me or the TV!? I could put him on 6 months' silence treatment... Or, cut the plug off.... Angry

OP posts:
MsVestibule · 23/02/2014 09:57

YANBU. If the issue was a stag weekend away somewhere, you'd huff and puff a bit, he'd go away anyway, you'd book a spa weekend as revenge (Wink), job done.

However, you're going to have to live with this for years. Is there any chance you could agree to keep it for a month, then exchange it if you really can't get used to it? Depends on the shop's exchange policy, I suppose.

Patilla · 23/02/2014 09:59

Give him a spare room to sleep in with the TV?!

It's difficult to know what to suggest now the deal is done. But you are not unreasonable to be upset at this change.

Can you afford to change the situation?

If so, could you try explaining it to him in terms he might understand. And as tempting as it might be to fill those terms with four letter words and I might not be able to resist that temptation personally is there something you would like in your families main living room, or the kids, that your DH might not like?

I know it's treating him a bit like a toddler but if needs must...

cocobongo · 23/02/2014 10:06

Argh, don't have any advice, especially as it is also bought, but this is chiming with my situation. DH is going on and on about getting a new tv, apparently our 37 inch is too small and he can barely see what is going on Hmm . So all of a sudden he is looking at 47 inch TVs, and of course, not just any TV, but a smart 3D TV. And ours is perfectly fine as it is! Grrrrrrr.

JumpingJackSprat · 23/02/2014 10:09

Is there something else going on that you're this upset over a tv?

usuallyright · 23/02/2014 10:10

Yabu.
We've got a 50 inch TV and its fantastic to watch movies on, lights off + surround sound.
We don't need to pay the extortionate costs of the cinema anymore!

lastnightIwenttoManderley · 23/02/2014 10:10

OP I totally sympathise. PIL constantly comment on our 32 inch TV and offer to give us theirs when we need a new one. Theirs is 47". They seem to forget that we bought our TV a year ago...out of choice. We could have had some imax style affair but are happy with the size we chose as it's a living room not a cinema.

Presumably for the shop to give a much larger TV, this one must be a reduced spec to the alternative smaller option? COuld you perhaps find some reviews/technical info highlighting this and point out to DH that you think it might be a liability? Might carry more weight than 'that thing is not coming in this house' which would be my response :)

PiperRose · 23/02/2014 10:12

YABU. You say your husband is a good man and father. Be happy, let this one go and stop being a princess because you didn't get your own way.

usuallyright · 23/02/2014 10:18

depends on how much of a film lover you are!
Frankly, I'm happy to have a home cinema with a big telly. There's a lot of snobbery about big TVs on Mumsnet. Makes me want to go for a 60 incher next time!

SavoyCabbage · 23/02/2014 10:19

How long have you had it? You might get used to it. I felt the same when we got ours but after a while it didn't seem big at all.

Patilla · 23/02/2014 10:19

OP I can't believe you're getting such stick on here.

It's a big deal having something so intrusive in your home. It takes over a room and can potentially turn it from a family space to a TV room.

YANBU

Joysmum · 23/02/2014 10:22

I think our tellys are too big, they make DH happy though so I put up and shut up about them. Given the choice I'd have smaller again but it's more important to him than it is annoying to me.

NoArmaniNoPunani · 23/02/2014 10:28

Once it's up on the wall it won't seem that big. I remember thinking ours was massive when DH first brought it home, I'm used to it now (still don't watch much TV)

usuallyright · 23/02/2014 10:36

you do get used to it.
When I visit friends with little tvs, I can't see the damn thing and I certainly couldn't watch a movie on one, unless I pushed the chair right up to the telly! (Perfect hearing and vision before you ask!)

Nanny0gg · 23/02/2014 10:41

Dunno how we all managed with our little 19" screen when the children were small...

I would be cross too OP. It's not just a TV decision, it's a room design/living decision that shouldn't be made unilaterally. How would he feel if you did something similar?

Original poster
Linus33 · 23/02/2014 11:30

What I probably haven't mentioned to those that think I am being unreasonable is that this TV is also in the the same room as a 90 inch projector screen!

My DH Envy has an obsession for tech and as much as this makes him happy I'm just pissed off that even though I say I'm unhappy about it, he just does what he wants anyway. You're right it's probably not just about the TV but other stuff.

Princess? Me? I'm am so far away from the Princess spectrum you wouldn't believe but I do get the point about there are other things to worry about... Grin

OP posts:
Original poster
Linus33 · 23/02/2014 11:44

Oh, get this. It's not on the wall yet but he wants it to be and wants to rip out an original 1930s oak fire surround to make way for it! Good grief AngryAngryAngry!!!

I think there's going to be words!

OP posts:
ReadyToPopAndFresh · 23/02/2014 11:47

yanbu, and make sure he knows it before he rips out the fire place!

LEMmingaround · 23/02/2014 11:48

I think if my DP went and bought a 50" TV i would leave. Well probably not, but i WOULD be seriously pissed off. We hae a 37" and thats too bloody big, although have managed to put it in an alcove.

Nanny0gg · 23/02/2014 11:54

Oh, get this. It's not on the wall yet but he wants it to be and wants to rip out an original 1930s oak fire surround to make way for it! Good grief

Will he take any notice if you put your foot down over this? I would be raging.

And does he not care that it's family space?

Original poster
Linus33 · 23/02/2014 12:00

With 2DS also equally into tech, I think I'm over-ruled on the what they want from the family space!

I don't think he will do that to the fire surround when he knows what that means to me. We've spent a lot time restoring this house but you never know! He's currently got his tape measure out to rearrange furniture!

OP posts:
KittensoftPuppydog · 23/02/2014 12:14

I felt exactly the same as you. I think I actually cried. He wasn't even allowed to unpack the box for a couple of days.
Then I watched it and fell in love.

KittensoftPuppydog · 23/02/2014 12:16

Linus
Ripping out an original fire surround is not ok though.

Fantissue · 23/02/2014 12:23

An extra ten inches is now "taking over" the room? Try and be sensible dear!

PiperRose · 23/02/2014 12:43

Linus I take it back. the 90 inch projector and now ripping out e fire surround. He's being a twunt.

PringleJess · 23/02/2014 12:47

YANBU, you should have get a say too

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