to decline their offer to stay?

[VelvetSpoon]

Have been invited to a gig in a few weeks. Not an area that's local enough to me to cab it back from, and public transport finishes long beforehand.

2 friends, A and B have each invited me to stay. Very kind of them. However

Friend A's boiler broke a couple of months ago. They have no heating or hot water (none, no immersion or anything). A goes to the gym every day and showers there, and isn't home much so claims not to notice the cold. It is however freezing, and the water in the taps is icy.

Friend B is a chronic hoarder. I could stay there (where there is hot water and some heating) but I'd be sleeping on a tiny sofa as the spare room (and pretty much every available surface including the floor) is covered in 'stuff'.

Much as I'd like to go to the gig, I really can't face a night at either house, lovely though A and B are!

WIBU to say no?

YANBU, and I am sure you can find a tactful way of saying no to them both.

Yanbu.

Drive.

Wow! You sound nice!

No YWNBU just say no!

How much would you like to go to the gig?

You could book into a cheap hotel

you could take lots of warm clothes and boil a kettle for a strip wash at the cold house or just step over stuff at horder friend's house and put up with it for one night.

It's nice of your friends to offer. But if you dont want to, of course its ok to say no

Do you really need to ask?

Go if you want to, decline if you want to.

I don't drive so that's not an option, and there aren't any nearby places to stay.

It's not a once in a lifetime opportunity or anything, just something I'd quite like to go to.

I have stayed at A's and it was just freezing.

B's is cold (though nowhere near AS cold!) and the sofa is only a 2 seater so would be a terrible night's sleep.

Plus as a (comparatively) tidy person the mess and clutter really gets to me!

I'd stay at either, it's just one night.

Stay at a's. Take a sleeping bag or decent duvet, pj's and extra socks to sleep in. Take a small heater and give them a donation for electric.

Stay at B's. It's just one night.

I wouldn't stay in either of those places if I had a choice. YANBU.

Well, I wouldn't really fancy staying at either of them but if I really really wanted to go to the gig...

I'd probably pick A and take a hot water bottle, thermal jammies and bedsocks!

I am an arachnophobe and that would put me off B - who knows what might be lurking under all the stuff!

ywnbu to say to either, of course, but presumably that would mean you miss the gig. Up to you.

I couldn't bear the mess, so I'd pick A and take thermals, an arctic sleeping bag, a hot water bottle and some of those pocket hottie things you can shake or snap to activate!

I wouldn't sleep at either house, sorry. I feel awful after a cramped night's sleep (B) and really hate being cold (A).

I don't think YABU for not wanting to stay with either of them. You're not obliged to!

But it is just one night. In your position, I'd stay with A and pack a duvet, fleecy PJs and bed socks.

I wouldn't stay at either house but then I wouldn't be interested in going to a gig anyway .

Stay at home, be warm and comfortable and listen to a CD of the band and save money .

So you've experienced both the places, only you will know what it's like so of you need random people to tell you what to do?

Say you got a cheap hotel (travel lodge are doing cheap rooms for £30 at the moment) so you wont be needing their generous offer of a room. Simples.

m.travelodge.co.uk/mt/www.travelodge.co.uk/saver_rooms/

I'd go and take a sleeping bag/hipflask and not be quite so precious.

If I really really wanted to go to the gig then I would wear thermals, pack a hot water bottle and stay at friend A's house.

I wonder how fussed you are about the gig...I have been so excited about bands in the past that I wouldn't have given a second thought about where I was sleeping afterwards, I just needed to there!!!

I keep hoping A might say 'oh I've had the boiler fixed' but no such luck.

I stayed at A's in early Dec, and it was so cold. I was fine in bed, I'm used to sleeping in layers and socks so that was ok. But getting dressed in the morning was painfully cold. Ditto brushing my teeth in icy water.

I'm just a bit middle-aged I think and like having a shower/bath in the morning, I feel grubby otherwise!

If I did go, I'd probably stay at B's. But the mess drives me crazy.

The nearest travelodge (or any place to stay) is miles away, it would prob work out the same as getting a cab all the way home.

Might just have to accept I'm too old to put up with discomfort!

I'd take a sleeping bag and thermals to A's. Its only one night

It's just one night. If you really want to go, sleep at A's. Take cold condition supplies with you.

Who makes the best breakfast?

Just don't go. And treat yourself to something else instead.

I'd choose A and just sleep in my clothes. You can get a shower when you get home.

If I had to stay at B's then I'd see if I could take an airbed.