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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To just fuck off with Ds next week until January ??

30 replies

ohdofuckrightoff · 12/12/2013 19:33

I cant take anymore and i need to get away !!

Not that i have anywhere or much money but i just cant stay here any longer .

DP will be working all of Christmas anyway so he wont notice

OP posts:
3littlefrogs · 12/12/2013 19:39

You sound at the end of your tether. Sad

What is wrong?

How old is DS?

Original poster
ohdofuckrightoff · 12/12/2013 19:42

I amt at the end of my tether Sad

Ds is 5

I havent a clue with where to start with whats wrong as their is just so much

OP posts:
Chippednailvarnish · 12/12/2013 19:45

I know the feeling. Can I come too? Smile

Ledkr · 12/12/2013 19:49

I've heard Tunisia is lovely at this time of year.

Original poster
ohdofuckrightoff · 12/12/2013 19:50

Led if only i had a passport

OP posts:
PumpkinPie2013 · 12/12/2013 19:50

Sorry you're having a tough time - you sound really stressed Sad

You mention your partner is working over Christmas - does he do a lot of hours? Will you get any time together?

Do you have any other friends or family you can talk to and spend time with?

I hope you manage to work things out and enjoy Christmas with your ds x

Original poster
ohdofuckrightoff · 12/12/2013 19:54

He is working all Christmas Eve , Christmas Day and then throughout the holiday season as he is a Chef .

Does anybody mind if i spill my guts ??
It will be quite a long one

OP posts:
readysteady · 12/12/2013 19:56

Go for it x

mrgarybarlow · 12/12/2013 19:59

Go on. It's therapeutic!!

Tapiocapearl · 12/12/2013 19:59

Do x

3littlefrogs · 12/12/2013 19:59

My DH worked constantly when my DC were little.

Can you have a couple of days of snuggly time in front of the TV, lots of arty crafty activities with DS, nice food, and maybe a trip to the local panto while your DH is at work, then have a "Christmas dinner" after the real one is over? DS probably won't care!

HandMini · 12/12/2013 20:02

Oh, panto is an excellent idea. Cinema as well.

gimcrack · 12/12/2013 20:05

Have you got any family you can stay with? Otherwise think about how you could plan a really relaxing time with your DS - presents, easy meal to give you coldies so you don't have to cook, films. Take the pressure off yourself and look after yourself.

IwishIwasmoreorganised · 12/12/2013 20:07

Type it out. A problem shared is a problem halved as they say. Even if it's not halved, it might help to get it all out.

Original poster
ohdofuckrightoff · 12/12/2013 20:07

I apologise for the length Blush

'Step Dad' is on remand for ABH which is a good thing .
He has been in Jail for 3/4 weeks .
He has had his family hassling my Dm telling her to drop charges etc but she cant as it is out of her hands now Thank God .

Yesterday his sister messaged saying that he has Cancer and is in hospital very ill , Today one of his friends turned up at my mums in tears saying he has Cancer and he is dying Hmm .

He had NOTHING wrong with him when he was arrested , Nothing at all !
He is Mid 30s .
So how the fuck can he go from been perfectly healthy to dying in 3 weeks , with a diagnosis of Prostate Cancer Confused

My idiot mum believes him ffs & im the bad guy for not believing him , Apparently its not fair on my db 7 as it is his dad and it is not fair on him.

Nobody involved with the case knows anything & now im been ignored Hmm

We were supposed to be having the first decent family Christmas without Step Dad ruining everything by making my mum spend the day with him ( he is muslim and does not celebrate so we all had to suffer)

Am i really been unreasonable to not believe a fucking word of it ??

He is/was looking at around 12-18 months in Prison

just cant take anymore and this is only half of it

OP posts:
RubyGoat · 12/12/2013 20:08

If you need to talk, talk. Someone might be able to help?

RubyGoat · 12/12/2013 20:12

That's awful. Surely if he was ill, the people working on his case would be aware? Sorry but it sounds like a story to get your found drop charges and/or make you all feel guilty.

Original poster
ohdofuckrightoff · 12/12/2013 20:12

I have nobody in real life to talk to which is rather pathetic .

No family i could go and stay with as my Ds has AS and would probably cause them all to have a nervous breakdown.

Panto sounds nice Ds would love that

OP posts:
Original poster
ohdofuckrightoff · 12/12/2013 20:13

Lego my thoughts exactly

OP posts:
RubyGoat · 12/12/2013 20:13

That should have said, 'to get your DM to drop the charges'.

Original poster
ohdofuckrightoff · 12/12/2013 20:19

That was my first thought and im struggling to believe that a healthy bloke can go from healthy to on deaths door in 3 weeks Confused

OP posts:
jeanmiguelfangio · 12/12/2013 20:23

That sounds like a story to get your mum to stop the charges. Thank god she can't. The legal team will know this and there will have to be evidence of it to decrease his sentance

Mmm mumsnet holiday anyone?

RubyGoat · 12/12/2013 20:26

He could be ill, it's true. BUT, the timing is awfully convenient, in terms of its impact on you & your family, & how guilty it may make you all feel if you continue to press any charges. I think if it were me, I'd smell a rat.

NurseRoscoe · 12/12/2013 20:27

Sorry if this cross posts however it is possible for cancer to go undiagnosed for a while, it can be symptom free or have mild symptoms that get brushed off as something minor by the patient meaning they don't seek medical advice. So it is possible that he could have it, 'dying' may mean 'terminal' too which doesn't necessarily mean he's going to die in the next few weeks, it could be months or years. I hope that clears it up a little bit?

I understand completely where you are coming from, if someone had battered my mum then I would hate them too and truthfully would not feel any remorse for them being ill. YANBU to feel that way.

However I wouldn't push your partner away, spend as much time with him as you can even though he is working, he will probably want to support you if he is a partner worth having. Like others have said, arrange lots of fun activities for you and your DS to take your minds off of things and don't be afraid to talk about how you are feeling.

Original poster
ohdofuckrightoff · 12/12/2013 20:29

Jean whats a mumsnet holiday Confused

I smell more than a rat , but apparently i should believe him and give a crap but i dont so im a heartless cow Confused

OP posts: