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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

M&S staff inappropriate about my post pregnancy size

85 replies

Onthebuses · 19/07/2013 21:59

Looking for new summer clothes in branch of m&s, carrying my 10 week old son, hot and uncomfortable as still having to wear pregnancy clothes as last summers clothes don't fit. I ask a sales person where the shorts are, she explains they are now selling autumn clothes, adds there are a few shorts left over the other side of the store

Then touches my hip and says but I don't think they would be in your size!!!

Taken aback I leave the store and email a letter of complaint for a) inappropriate touching and b) her making a snide judgement about my size

V standard response from complaints/brush off.

Not on??

OP posts:
Readallaboutit1 · 19/07/2013 22:01

YANBU how rude of her!

Congratulations Smile

Pigsmummy · 19/07/2013 22:02

Today is Friday, sorry if that fact offends you......

TWinklyLittleStar · 19/07/2013 22:03

Er, perhaps it was like New Look today and the only shorts left were in a size 8 so she was trying to save you the time and effort of looking for something that wasn't there?

hairylittlegoblin · 19/07/2013 22:03

Are you sure she meant they would be too small?

My friend was once 'offended' in Bravissimo when they suggested they wouldn't have anything to suit her. She thought they were implying she was too frumpy to wear their stuff until she checked the sizes and realised she was too, er, petite for their ranges.

ProphetOfDoom · 19/07/2013 22:04

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

HorryIsUpduffed · 19/07/2013 22:04

That's very rude. She could have given you the same information by saying "but there aren't many sizes left" or something.

As for touching you Shock

SoupDragon · 19/07/2013 22:06

Perhaps it was simply because there were none left in your size Confused

I think you have overreacted. Even about the fact that she Shock touched your hip.

WorraLiberty · 19/07/2013 22:06

How did she make a 'snide' judgement? Confused

She sells clothes, she knows what sizes are in stock and she doesn't think they have your size.

I'm not sure about the touching thing, some people don't like it...others don't mind it.

I don't think it's anything to start sending emails about.

Ikeameatballs · 19/07/2013 22:06

But they might not have been in your size? She might ave been trying to help you?

I know that perhaps it depends upon how she said it etc but some of it is down to your perception of it too.

SoupDragon · 19/07/2013 22:06

She didn't grab your arse and give it a squeeze saying "This won't fit in any of them!"

Original poster
Onthebuses · 19/07/2013 22:08

Yep I think that's my point. Give info on sizes and absolutely no touching.

OP posts:
ll31 · 19/07/2013 22:08

Yabu. Carrying a baby, so she saved u walking thru shop unnecessarily. You seem to get offended v easily

Eilidhbelle · 19/07/2013 22:09

That's so rude! I agree, she could've easily said 'there's not many sizes left, but you could try online?' or whatever. Am gobsmacked that people think that was an ok thing to say to someone!

ll31 · 19/07/2013 22:10

Oh try and relax... She touched your hip.... A capital offense... Maybe your over tired, otherwise you're off.

josiejay · 19/07/2013 22:10

I was in M&S with my baby recently, looking at some shorts and the assistant said 'oh don't look so sad, you'll get back in to them one day'!

I was most taken aback because (a) I didn't think I looked sad (must just be my face) and (b) I bloody could get in to them thank you very much!

Wonder if it was the same assistant?!

I didn't complain as I think she was actually trying to be nice, just found it a bit bizarre.

Original poster
Onthebuses · 19/07/2013 22:10

Snide comment - her tone was dismissive from the start and comment was accompanied by a disproving look.

OP posts:
EugenesAxe · 19/07/2013 22:11

If she said it in a voice that implied she was trying to be funny or sarcastic, YANBU.

If she said it matter-of-factly then YABU. The touching thing is a moot point - ideally she wouldn't have but it wouldn't have bothered me or many people; I would put it down to different personalities really.

MaccaPaccaismyNemesis · 19/07/2013 22:12

I went to m&s to buy a breast feeding bra, and my DS was about 3 days old. The person behind the till said 'not lost the baby weight yet'. Reader, I cried in the shop. SadAngry

TWinklyLittleStar · 19/07/2013 22:12

So you've decided that YANBU no matter what?

Lj8893 · 19/07/2013 22:12

I think even if she didn't mean it in the way you took it, she still worded it wrong and therefore you have every right to be offended!

I wouldnt dream of saying that to a customer!

musicposy · 19/07/2013 22:14

I can't really see what you are complaining about. Most of the shorts left in the sales (at least when I looked) are 6 or 8 with maybe a few 20s and 22s left too.
The middle sizes sell out, so more likely she just thought you were in that sold out group -as most people are - and saved you the bother of looking. The touching was a bit rude, I admit, but she hardly groped your arse.

SisterMonicaJoan · 19/07/2013 22:14

YANBU

If I were a shop assistant and saw a new mum with a baby I wouldn't dream of making a comment on her size (and as for the touching [shocked]

Also, the assistant assumed they were for the OP (ok they were but she didn't know that and just went ahead with comments about size)

Congratuations on your baby op Flowers

MagratGarlik · 19/07/2013 22:14

What would you want the complaints department to do?

She said she didn't think there would be any in your size, it's not like she said, "people you'd size shouldn't be wearing shorts you fat oaf" or some other such comment

JeanBodel · 19/07/2013 22:14

You sound very oversensitive about your size.

a) As others have pointed out, she might have meant you are too small for what's left

b) Even if not, why are you so offended by the suggestion that you may be too big for the clothes in stock? What's wrong with big people? Should I now shake my head huffily and write a letter of complaint that someone was offended at the mere suggestion they may take a large-than average size of clothing?

Viviennemary · 19/07/2013 22:16

I don't think it was appropriate from a salesperson. But she thought she was probably just saving you time saying there were none left in your size. Just forget about it.