M&S staff inappropriate about my post pregnancy size

[Onthebuses]

Looking for new summer clothes in branch of m&s, carrying my 10 week old son, hot and uncomfortable as still having to wear pregnancy clothes as last summers clothes don't fit. I ask a sales person where the shorts are, she explains they are now selling autumn clothes, adds there are a few shorts left over the other side of the store

Then touches my hip and says but I don't think they would be in your size!!!

Taken aback I leave the store and email a letter of complaint for a) inappropriate touching and b) her making a snide judgement about my size

V standard response from complaints/brush off.

Not on??

I think this is possibly the downside to emails

People can now instantly complain at the touch of a few buttons and fire off an angry email before they've had time to stop and think it through/calm down.

When we had to use Royal Mail, by the time you'd written a letter, found the head office address, dug out an envelope, bought a stamp and remembered to post it the next time you pass a postbox...a lot of people would have got over it or moved on.

I expect there were a much higher number of complaints with substance back then.

YANBU. Would OP be unreasonable about that if it was a man that had touched her hip? I would be annoyed at that too.

Or a dog or a kangaroo or Buzz Lightyear

I bet she meant they had a 6 or 22. Ie no normal sizes that would fit me either.

@ worra

To obesity...............and beyyoooooonnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnd!

I don't think YABU. I also think it's possible that the assistant may have been trying to be helpful, but a far more tactful way of saying it would have been, "We're nearing the end of the sales, only the very small and large sizes are left I think." (assuming you're in the middle category).

And no touch on the hip! A touch on the upper arm, if she had to, but who touches a customer's hip?!

Everyone

Lol- not sure where that stray "everyone" appeared from!

Malcolm!!

Meh, make fun of what I say all you want worra, of OP had posted about a male sales person doing this, responses would be considerably different.

If*

I spy Worzel Gommidge! straw man

A big fat YANBU!!! Sales assistants should be kind, helpful and, if the occasion demands it, tactful. You can tell she wasn't on commission. Having just had a baby you are bound to be feeling sensitive but then so are a lot of women, especially about their body size, a lot of the time and especially in hot weather, looking for shorts. She has a lot to learn about her craft and that is her problem, not your's, beautiful, clever, lucky new-mummy OP.

BTW the shorts I tried on in M&S were very strangely cut so as to give me a massive camel-toe even two sizes up with big, poofy, pocket-hip pouches. Try BHS, I know it's a bit naff but I'm currently extremely comfortable in the linen number I found therein. Congratulations on your baby x

BHS - excellent. Thanks for the short tip.
Camel toe - woe - who test drives their clothes?

I wonder? Made me feel I may have freakishly plump labia! Who needs to add to their body paranoia? M&S ladies have twice made me feel terrible, once over a bra, "have you tried this on?!?" and once over their sandals which broke, stating that my foot was probably too wide! Now I vary between a 12 & a 16 but I'm not huge!

Yanbu

The comments would have pissed me off a bit but not as much as the hip touching tbh.

Would rather my arse cheeks were groped than my hips.

oh get lost.. can't believe this.

I touch people a lot when i'm talking to them - particularly strangers. No idea why!

E.g. I was in a shop today and asked a lady to go and check stock for something. She came back and said she'd completely forgotten what i'd said, could i repeat. We both shared a laugh. I touched her arm and said 'Don't worry, i'd forget my own head if it wasn't screwed on' (or something naff like that).

So maybe the hip touching was unrelated to what she was saying?

YANBU. If she did mean there were only silly sizes left, she could have worded it so much better.
Way to make you feel bad saleswoman.

I think it's fucking ridiculous that anyone is insinuating you are being unreasonable. Customer service training is expensive for any retail business. I have been through it many times myself. I would never ever have been taught that touching a customer or making any comment which would be perceived as remotely personal would be acceptable. YANBU. I would complain.

YANBU
It sounds quite tactless and unprofessional.

You're projecting.

You seem sensitive about your current weight and taking it out on this random sales assistant.

No way she should have touched you or make you feel bad. Sounds like she needs work on her customer service skills.

How is saying there are none left in your size sizeist?

YANBU. It's completely inappropriate, and complaints people should have spoken to the member of staff.

I think YABU and a little over-sensitive.

YANBU!

Regardless of whether the OP is feeling delicate about her weight or not, a retail assistant should not be making a judgement (and definitely not a comment) about someone's size unless specifically asked by the customer. The OP asked where the shorts were, not if the assistant thought they would fit her!

The appropriate response would've been "they're over there, but unfortunately we don't have many sizes left".

The touching would bother me as well. It's possible to be a warm, friendly person and provide good customer service without invading personal space IMO.