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AIBU?

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Original poster

Was I rude today to not let him in ?

49 replies

BoysRule · 27/06/2013 21:13

This has been praying on my mind today so I need some opinions as to whether I was rude.

A man knocked at the door today - he was wearing a bib and had an ID tag around his neck. I didn't really see the name of the company. It was a children's charity and he was asking for a monthly direct debit. I told him that we have several direct debits for various charities and we couldn't give to any others (this is true). He then said that he wasn't supposed to ask this but he needed the toilet and could he use mine.

I am not normally this ballsy but something just made me say, sorry, I'd rather you didn't. DS2 was upstairs asleep and something just made me uncomfortable - he was one of those over friendly people (trained to be so I am sure) and I just had images of him coming in and something bad happening.

Anyway, it has prayed on me since as he really did only need the toilet I am sure. Was I rude?

OP posts:
Tee2072 · 27/06/2013 21:13

Nope. Not at all.

And so what if you were?

BrianTheMole · 27/06/2013 21:15

Not if you felt uncomfortable. We've had a couple of taxi drivers come in and use the loo and it felt odd. I didn't like it.

JamieandtheMagicTorch · 27/06/2013 21:15

No, If you weren't comfortable, then you were quite right not to let him in. There must be some other contingency for door-to-door people.

yaimee · 27/06/2013 21:15

Your safety and feelings trumps rude.
As long as you told him politely yanbu.

TondelayoSchwarzkopf · 27/06/2013 21:15

YADNBU. He was a weirdo and I bet a legit charity would very much advise against such a request.

Branleuse · 27/06/2013 21:16

I had a chugger ask to use my toilet the other day. I gave him the directions to the public toilets nearby instead. They just want to get in your house.

emsyj · 27/06/2013 21:16

If something made you uncomfortable then you did the right thing by saying no. I don't think I would let a stranger into my house to use the loo either tbh. There are public toilets within walking distance of my house so I would direct them there.

cozietoesie · 27/06/2013 21:16

Not at all. I wouldn't let them across the doorstep!

EndoplasmicReticulum · 27/06/2013 21:16

No, you don't have to let strangers in your house to use your toilet.

McNewPants2013 · 27/06/2013 21:17

yanbu, If people are working in my home then they are free to use the loo, but not some stranger on the door step.

intheshed · 27/06/2013 21:17

I wouldn't have let him in.

Cherriesarelovely · 27/06/2013 21:19

yanbu at all. Well done for listening to your instincts.

hermioneweasley · 27/06/2013 21:20

No, not rude. I woukdn't let a strange man into my house. A bib and a lanyard prove nothing.

ChippingInWiredOnCoffee · 27/06/2013 21:21

No - you did the right thing, you listened to your instincts. A lot of those people are actually checking out the houses to see which ones are worth breaking into.

MyMelody · 27/06/2013 21:22

not rude at all, you did the right thing

bigTillyMint · 27/06/2013 21:23

YANBU - no way would I have let him in.

TarkaTheOtter · 27/06/2013 21:23

YANBU. I would complain to his agency. Completely unprofessional for him to ask.

everlong · 27/06/2013 21:24

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
BoysRule · 27/06/2013 21:26

I did direct him to the nearest public toilet but it is about a 10 minute walk away. Thank you for reassuring me, it is the first time I have done something like that and I did feel uncomfortable saying no.

OP posts:
SolidGoldBrass · 27/06/2013 21:27

YANBU at all. I have done door-to-door work and would never have asked to use the loo in someone's house; I used to keep a mental list of places where you can find a loo (Wetherspoons, libraries, big supermarkets, leisure centres)

Coconutty · 27/06/2013 21:28

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SuperLemonCrush · 27/06/2013 21:30

Not at all, they keep telling little children to "listen to their uh-oh feeling", you do usually have a sense of when something is not right. Well done.

cees · 27/06/2013 21:31

Yanbu, no way would he have gotten past me either, I'd have directed him to the nearest bush Grin

JamieandtheMagicTorch · 27/06/2013 21:32

You should always listen to your gut feeling. Wishing not to appear rude should not compromise your safety

RinkyDinkyDoo · 27/06/2013 21:36

Glad I read this, as I probably would have said ok, up the stairs to the right,without thinking if the consequences.

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