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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

Original poster

To want to know why the making a mess in the café thread disappeared?

66 replies

SomethingOnce · 25/04/2013 22:39

Seriously, how in the blazes can it have broken the Talk Guidelines?

I had some choice comments about entitled MC parents using cafés as a miraculously self-cleaning weaning space (and then leaving a shit tip) but the thread has gone.

I'd been looking forward to it all bastard day.

OP posts:
MoonlightandRoses · 25/04/2013 22:44

Well, to summarise - there was a large bun-fight in the middle bit of the thread and then it appeared the OP may have had some sort of agenda in posting what she did (and didn't really come back either...), or was possibly just exaggerating (but probably not as she'd posted the same thing on other sites too), and then it went up in a puff of smoke.

No interesting deletion message either - you would have thought with a cafe and cake being involved they could have come up with something. Grin

ilovesooty · 25/04/2013 22:44

Well, it named the cafe and things were getting a bit heated last night. I noticed the OP had left negative reviews on netmums and at least one other site, so perhaps HQ thought it safer to remove it.

MoonlightandRoses · 25/04/2013 22:45

I mean was probably stirring rather than exaggerating with the other site posting - not clear from previous post. Blush

TheUnsinkableTitanic · 25/04/2013 22:46

it named the cafe

i was fascinated by the thread and peoples opinions about how a toddler should eat a cake

i'm in the make a mess and we tidy up before we go :)

Original poster
SomethingOnce · 25/04/2013 22:50

Most people I see prefer the 'leave it for the kids on minimum wage to pick up after us' approach.

Ah well, it's disappointing but I shall console myself with another a small piece of tiffin and a cup of tea.

OP posts:
Original poster
SomethingOnce · 25/04/2013 22:51

And thanks all for satisfying my curiosity Smile

OP posts:
MoonlightandRoses · 25/04/2013 22:55

As long as the toddler only eats their cake and doesn't start on mine, they can eat it any which way they like.

(I do clean up any excess mess afterwards but admittedly there's rarely much as small child is v.good at the stealth lick up gathering of any cake crumbs manoeuvre.)

MadameDefarge · 25/04/2013 23:34

Just for record, as a one time cafe owner, I much preferedmy customers to leave mess where I and my staff could see it and clean it properly.

All those "helpful" parents are just making things hard; a wipe bit of glop on the floor might disappear to your eyes but still leaves a residue, which could result in a slip...

being a waitress is not all about serving food, it also encompasses cleaning and ensuring food hygiene standards are adhered to.

Just saying. you get no medals or thanks for making things look clean when they are actually still dirty.

MadameDefarge · 25/04/2013 23:34

And any waitress or waiter who thinks proper cleaning is beneath them is not a professional.

GreenEggsAndNichts · 25/04/2013 23:38

Madame I've found the same. I do tidy after DS, but have been shoo'ed away from the actual cleaning by staff (thankfully never in a grumpy way, and it doesn't happen too often anyway as we rarely go out for cake!) They thank me for taking all the dishes back to their bins etc, but definitely seem to prefer to do the cleaning themselves.

And as someone who has waited tables and cleaned up after other peoples' children in the past, I agree.

Arseface · 25/04/2013 23:41

I want to eat cake in Madame's cafe.

Original poster
SomethingOnce · 25/04/2013 23:43

Surely, if you're cleaning properly, you clean everywhere anyway and don't need huge lumps of deconstructed croissant for signposting? Confused

OP posts:
MadameDefarge · 25/04/2013 23:51

it can get busy..staff can overlook a table that looks clean...and areas around a table...they have bleeding idea that someone thought it would be helpful to wipe up floor spills with a napkin...leaving a greasy area ripe for skidding on.

these things were MY responsibility..if a customer gets hurt it is my fault, not random customer trying to be helpful but creating issues for the future.

We use specific cleaners for these issues. because they work. a quick swipe with a napkin does not a a hygienic environment make.

MadameDefarge · 25/04/2013 23:53

and thank you green and arse. I have this debate on regular basis here.

Some people just wont give up the idea that its okay for kids to make a mess and essential that staff do the cleaning.

Some weirdy controlling thing.

MadameDefarge · 25/04/2013 23:58

and sorry for my missing words! must preview post.

Original poster
SomethingOnce · 26/04/2013 00:05

That's right, it's a weirdy controlling thing Hmm

I was almost persuaded until you came up with that.

OP posts:
MadameDefarge · 26/04/2013 00:09

something, make of that what you will. I have had so many debates on here about this very issue when people will still claim it makes them a moral and good person ...even when professionals say please don't do it. So yeah, I have a view on that, if you still insist on doing it..its not about hygiene, its about you and your view of yourself and how you interact with the world. smear food all over...if the fact its now hidden makes you a great person then go for it.

not up for a ridiculous fight about it. make a mess. clear it up. don't clear it up. whatever.

Lazyjaney · 26/04/2013 00:16

It was increasingly looking like a flacking, and it named the place. I was astounded at how many people took the OP at face value.

Original poster
SomethingOnce · 26/04/2013 00:26

Fair enough.

As an adult, I'll be sure to follow up with a nice obvious salad leaf or sprinkling of cous cous should I inadvertently dress the floor with a smear of slip hazard vinaigrette, because I'm nice like that. And I want the world to know.

OP posts:
GreenEggsAndNichts · 26/04/2013 00:27

I was pleased I caught it again before it was deleted, actually. When I'd left it, things were relatively calm, and she hadn't named the place. Once she did, it shot up to something like 200 posts. Someone else knew the owners, and it was amazing how it took off.

Definitely something fishy with the OP.

Original poster
SomethingOnce · 26/04/2013 00:29

Naming the place does make it look a bit sus - they were right to delete, I just wish I'd had the thread preserved to read on the train.

OP posts:
Lazyjaney · 26/04/2013 00:32

There was another one about a Fish and Chip shop last week, similar flacking hallmarks, HQ pulled that too. What was quite heartening was so many people pulled the OP up, so if it was flacking it backfired.

SaggyOldClothCatPuss · 26/04/2013 00:33

It was a disgusting thread, naming and 'shaming' a business and linking to their website and social media pages so that the OP all and sundry could post damaging reviews. I for one reported it. It's unfair to post things which could potentially damage a persons livelihood somewhere where they cant answer the accusations.

MadameDefarge · 26/04/2013 00:37

something, do you have a problem with food establishments having decent cleaning standards?

Do you have any idea of the hoops we have to go through with risk assessments and training on these very issues? Written assessments. Proof of training blah blah blah. Welcome to the world of catering.

Or have you just pegged me for some OCD nut? Yeah, stalking customers armed with cleaner and a mad look in my eye.

ilovesooty · 26/04/2013 00:42

It's unfair to post things which could potentially damage a persons livelihood somewhere where they cant answer the accusations

Absolutely. And the vindictive smears on other sites were just spiteful. Strange that other public reviews were overwhelmingly positive and only the perpetrator of that thread seemed to have an issue.