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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Lace ups or velcro??

64 replies

bizzey · 14/10/2012 17:38

Ex dh doesn't agree that I still let ds's wear shoes with velcro and I should be teaching them to use shoes with laces everday !

My point is WHY !! T her are shoes that make lives easier /quicker for all of us and eventually they will do lace ups (ds1 can on his football boots )...

In fact shoes can go from velcro to slip on !

BTW exdh never had anything to do with school run or understanding of how quick they have to get changed for PE before we separated (well he did ..but didn't listen !)

Ok should point out now ds's are not toddlers 11/9/7 yrs

I am teaching them in my own time lace ups ...but in that quick minute before PE !!! They would panic !!

OP posts:

ClippedPhoenix · 14/10/2012 17:48

To be honest OP they should all be able to tie their own shoe laces at their age so it should never be a worry about PE.

Original poster

bizzey · 14/10/2012 17:50

BTW ...I forgot to say I do not have the patience of watching them "trying to do it" and saying "NOOO I can do it " when we have 2 mins to get out of the house !! and I want to help !!!!

OP posts:

Startailoforangeandgold · 14/10/2012 17:51

Velcro!!!!
Why fight with the old fashioned method, when something superior exists.

At senior school Velcro might be considered babyish, but enjoy speed and convenience as long as possible.

And down with fucking ties!

McHappyPants2012 · 14/10/2012 17:52

11 years old and can't tie shoe laces up. I am sorry but all 3 DS should be able to tie shoes up.

Startailoforangeandgold · 14/10/2012 17:54

DD1 can tie her tie once a week and slip it on and off, DD2 can't.

ClippedPhoenix · 14/10/2012 17:59

yeah but it's a bit like ony being able to drive and automatic. Learn the gears and you can do both!

Startailoforangeandgold · 14/10/2012 18:00

It's not can DCs do laces if they have too. It's why add unnecessary hassle to your life.

I can tie laces, I still wear elastic Sketches and zip boots.

Only mad men have button flies and most of us wear long sleeved Tshirts not blouses with buttons. How many DHs leave their shirts done up?

nooka · 14/10/2012 18:00

I found some little clips to go on ds's shoe laces once the styles stopped being lace ups (he is 13). He can technically tie shoelaces, but he does it very badly and it seems to lead to wrecked shoes in no time flat whereas the pair with the clips have stayed looking smart. Some children/people find tying laces much harder than others (dd has no problem) and so long as they aren't compulsory why not use Velcro instead?

Original poster

bizzey · 14/10/2012 18:02

ds1 and 2 can do laces ...but it is "painful "to watch !! ds3 ..who sorry is 8 yrs (pressed wrong number!) is undergoing other tests anyhow ..so is sort of out of the equation otf 11/9 (10 in a few weeks )...but ....so they SHOULD be able to do them easily ...but does it matter ??

OP posts:

squoosh · 14/10/2012 18:03

11, 9 and 7 and can't tie their laces?

Honestly, why go through life avoiding laces? They're really not that tricky!

EdithWeston · 14/10/2012 18:03

I think mine all still had Velcro for their (primary) school shoes at that age, but not for anything else, especially not trainers (coach explained that you need the proper support of a lace up when you start more focussed training).

ClippedPhoenix · 14/10/2012 18:04

Practice makes perfect though and "gadgets" tend to break or fall off. Stop molly coddling and let them learn for god sake.

nancerama · 14/10/2012 18:05

I'm 36 and still tie 2 bunny ears together. The proper way has always flummoxed me.

ClippedPhoenix · 14/10/2012 18:06

Bunny ears is fine nan, however you do it is fine. Not doing it and avoiding it is the silly thing.

ClippedPhoenix · 14/10/2012 18:09

Be honest OP you're doing it for convenience and who wouldn't with 3! it's not becasue you're panicking about them and PE .

Why don't you tell ex to bloody help?

AlwaysHoldingOnToStarbug · 14/10/2012 18:10

He can always teach them himself? But I do think they should be able to tie laces themselves now. Ds3 & 4 learnt over the holidays - they needed proper walking boots for camp. I thought it would take ages for them to do it but it only took a few goes before they were doing it. They're still quite slow but at least they do it themselves.

And I'm not usually one who cares about peer pressure and what other kids wear etc but I can see a kid wearing Velcro shoes for PE at high school getting the piss ripped out of them.

Jenny70 · 14/10/2012 18:13

I agree they'll get it eventually, so why stress?

Only issue i had with bigfooted 9yr old is he outgrew shoes that came in velcro.

I bought curly laces that pull through laces holes & then you pull them to go tight and the curls stop them coming loose. I think i bought off ebay or amazon, seemed a good compromise.

He did actually learn in one day over the summer, but sometimes if ends too short he gets frustrated, but does it most times ok.

Original poster

bizzey · 14/10/2012 18:17

Thanks for your replies.... They are doing it ...just very slowly !! I am not avoiding it ...just cant see what the significance of it all is ?

startail..

OP posts:

LIZS · 14/10/2012 18:18

The only reason ds didn't have lace-ups before secondary was because he is dyspraxic and couldn't coordinate his hands and maintain tension. Even then he had lace-up football boots and walking boots as velcro ones were hard to come by. I don't think trainers are such an issue but at least 11 yr old could for school shoes.

valiumredhead · 14/10/2012 18:19

I think at that age they should all be able to do their laces and have practised enough so that they are quick at it. What does the eldest do about football boots at school - doesn't he need to wear them?

ClippedPhoenix · 14/10/2012 18:23

Because all kids unless special needs etc. which goes without saying, should be able to muster how to do this from a rather early age same as telling the time. Velcro was invented to be lazy for convenience.

It's good for their fine motor skills and as another poster said, their peers will start taking the piss out of them. Velcro shoes are baby shoes.

UniS · 14/10/2012 19:39

age 7- I would expect them to ABLE to tie a show lace. it may be slow, but they get better with practise. DS started term wearing lace up shoes, able to tie laces but succeeding about 50% of time, with in a week it was 90% and after 3 weeks he no longer asks a TA to tie his trainers before PE.

Lace up shoes (and trainers) fit his feet better than velro ones. Trust me we have tried LOTS of shoes.

DeWe · 14/10/2012 19:45

Why hasn't he taught them to tie laces if he's so bothered.

Original poster

bizzey · 14/10/2012 20:08

Thank you DeWea...He only sees them 3 x a year !...and when he has them in the holidays he is looking after GF ds's ....(say no more)

I am still struggling to see what the big picture /issue is ??

DS1 can do laces
DS2 canish do laces

DS3 cant do laces (undergoing dx's)

OP posts:

TapirBackRider · 14/10/2012 20:12

I'd like to point out that my ds (13) has just learned to do laces, and has used and still uses velcro shoes. They are NOT baby shoes - nor is he lazy.

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