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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

So cross with dh work

32 replies

englishpigdog · 07/10/2012 11:33

AIBU to be totally pissed off that dh's work phoned 13 times and sent a barage of text messages on his day off. We were busy and dh didn't have his phone with him. They needed something he had (not something that only he hass they could of got another one from somewhere very easily) so they apparantly sent some one to our house and made them sit wait for 15 mins in case we came home. Now dh is likely to face a bollocking for being unavailable (even though he doesn't have to be available on his days off). Just want some advice on what he can say to them when they try said bollocking. I am fuming and think he needs to tell them that his day off is his time and to not contact him.

OP posts:
WorraLiberty · 07/10/2012 11:36

I can't believe they could have got another one very easily if they went to all that trouble?

Does your DH really not know what to say? Confused

How about "It was my day off and I don't have to be available"?

sookiesookie · 07/10/2012 11:36

even though he doesn't have to be available on his days off).

^^ say this. Which is what you said in your op.

Original poster
englishpigdog · 07/10/2012 11:44

I can't believe they could have got another one very easily if they went to all that trouble?

They could of got another one and that is what they did in the end.

this particular supervisor is a nob and dh has had problems with him before, He tries to throw his weight around. To be fair it's more me worrying about it than dh but thanks for making me feel like a twat !!

OP posts:
quoteunquote · 07/10/2012 11:44

What was it?

Original poster
englishpigdog · 07/10/2012 11:49

I'm not saying as it might identify us.

OP posts:
GoldPlatedNineDoors · 07/10/2012 11:52

They sent someone to your home to sit and wait for 15mins incase your dh was in? They have too many staff if they can do this.

Sounds like borderline harassment to me.

comedycentral · 07/10/2012 11:54

I agree with the above poster. It sounds like harassment, it really isn't how you manage people in the workplace. Your OH should go above his head.

Original poster
englishpigdog · 07/10/2012 11:56

Thanks GoldPlatedNineDoors, I think so too and think dh should put a complaint in about this nob but he doesn't want to as he doesn't let him get under his skin. So really it's just me that gets wound up about it Grin too much time on my hands too.

OP posts:
scentednappyhag · 07/10/2012 11:57

What makes you think they'll bollock him for being unavailable? Have they done so before? Or are you worrying about it and planning a worst case?
Sorry his work are being so shitty Sad

Original poster
englishpigdog · 07/10/2012 12:03

It's just how this bloke is, although I am probably worrying about nothing as I am quite an anxious person and going through quite an emotional time at the moment which doesn't help.

OP posts:
OutragedAtThePriceOfFreddos · 07/10/2012 12:05

Should your DH have had the thing with him, or was he in the wrong by not leaving it at work?

scentednappyhag · 07/10/2012 12:07

I hope things get easier for you soon OP.

user12785 · 07/10/2012 12:07

My dh's work used to do this. They stopped after doing it on my birthday, when I answered his phone and told them to stop. There was a pause, a very quiet "Happy Birthday Mrs Eg", and they haven't done it since Smile

Nancy66 · 07/10/2012 12:09

...but if he'd had his phone with him then, presumably, they'd just have called him once - not 13 times.

Depends totally on the job he does. There are some jobs where being on call even at weekends/days off goes with the territory.

Soditall · 07/10/2012 12:10

Agree with other posters harassment.

If anyone does have a go at them,then he should make a complaint.

The supervisor being this way may not bother your husband,but if the blokes a knob to someone else out work they might not be as confident as your husband so it could undermine them.I'd report him for everyone's sake.

Good luck to your hubby.

mellen · 07/10/2012 12:13

If he shouldnt have taken the thing home then he cant complain that they tried to get hold of him to get it back.

Original poster
englishpigdog · 07/10/2012 12:13

He should have it, they all have one but someone lost/broke theirs and instead of going to get a new one wanted dh's, He would of had to give it back on monday and go get a new one anyway so made very little sense. I think this supervisor has got a problem with dh because he wont be bullied by him.

I only started this thread because dh thinks I'm making too big a deal out of it, but I want it nipping in the bud now as I don't want them turning up when they feel like it. I feel dh should go over his head to make sure it doesn't happen again.

OP posts:
makinglemonade · 07/10/2012 12:19

I sympathise completely OP. I rarely get a day off without a call or email about something! I took a day off yesterday to attend a funeral and the calls started at 10.30am!!! I was livid. This was my boss looking for info that to me could have waited until Monday.
I'm waiting for the same bollocking tomorrow.

I plan to be very direct and say that my day off is my own and I shouldn't be worrying about a work issue when my family needed me!!!

This shit makes me so angry!

marriedinwhite · 07/10/2012 12:22

I think it's your DH's job OP and you need to let your DH handle it how he thinks best.

Next time your DH has a day off, the best you can do is make sure his phone is charged and he has it with him so he can deal with it straight away and so it doesn't turn into a mountain.

Salmotrutta · 07/10/2012 12:23

That's terrible makinglemonade - pestering you when you had a funeral!

OP - if your husband isn't "on call" and they pester him for spurious reasons on his day off then it is borderline harrassment if he gets a bollocking when he goes in.
Fair enough if they had maybe called once to see if he could get them out of a genuine jam but for a piece of equipment they could easily have replaced is ridiculous.
Is he in a union?

Sausagedog27 · 07/10/2012 12:36

This is terrible! You could try posting on the employment boards- thereafe some very helpful people there that might be able to advise on the legalities etc.

diddl · 07/10/2012 12:37

"but if he'd had his phone with him then, presumably, they'd just have called him once "

And what?

Asked him go home to wait for someone to pick the thing up?

Asked him to take it into work?

He wasn´t on call!!

OP-if he wants to do nothing about it-up to him.

But perhaps he should at least keep the texts, make sure that there is a record that it was a day off & he doesn´t have to be available.

Then if it happens again, he has some record.

diddl · 07/10/2012 12:38

"Next time your DH has a day off, the best you can do is make sure his phone is charged and he has it with him so he can deal with it straight away and so it doesn't turn into a mountain. "

Why?

Why shouldn´t his boss find an alternative solution-isn´t that what he´s paid for??!!

Original poster
englishpigdog · 07/10/2012 12:44

marriedinwine, of course my dh will handle it, I'm not about to start ringing his boss or anything, it's just he is so laid back at times. I'm sorry but I don't agree that dh should be at their beck and call 27/7 and I'm quite surprised that anyone would think this acceptable, I'm not going to make sure he carries his work phone with him all the time otherwise what's the point in having time off ? It's not just his time, it's our time and I don't want work eating into time spent together as a family. Is that so bad ?

makinglemonade that is awfull them ringing you at a time like that.

Fair enough if they had maybe called once to see if he could get them out of a genuine jam but for a piece of equipment they could easily have replaced is ridiculous*

*Salmotrutta this is what i said and yes he's in the union and he did say if this bloke gets too stroppy he will contact them for advice.

OP posts:
ilovesooty · 07/10/2012 12:50

While I agree that he shouldn't be harrassed on his day off I think how he handles this at work is entirely up to him. He sounds quite strong enough not to let this supervisor get to him and I think you should leave him to deal with it as he sees fit.