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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not bother going down the Tooth Fairy route?

35 replies

Livingupatree · 24/09/2012 14:32

I have 2 dc, the eldest is 5.5 so probably about to start losing teeth. Iabu in planning to tell them there's no such thing as the tooth fairy? It just seems a bit much really, and quite a lot of effort to maintain the lie! When I was little the tooth fairy used to be quite unreliable, often leaving the tooth under the pillow for a few days- I suspect it might be similar nowadays.

Obviously I'm a total hypocrite as we have done Father Christmas and love the magic of that. But, I soon put a stop to the bloody Easter Bunny at MILs house!

OP posts:
livealoha · 24/09/2012 14:35

Oooh interested to see what response you get.

My ds is 4 and a half and I was wondering the same thing.

Will there be trouble at school?

Why is there one? Is it to make them feel better about he loss?

Will wait and see!

Ithinkitsjustme · 24/09/2012 14:39

I did do the whole tooth fairy thing but wish I hadn't bothered - what a waste of time! Grin. Our tooth fairy was always busy and was late etc, etc. Never had any change, gets more expensive every year blah, blah. If you can get away with it, go for it, just ask her not to spoil it for her friends (even if their parents would really bless her for it Grin) Let her feel superior that she knows something they don't know (my parents always told me that Santa didn't exist and I think I'm now scarred for life!!)

aldiwhore · 24/09/2012 14:41

We did it half heartedly. It was no big deal.

The children cottened on fairly quick when a) we forgot b) we hadn't have a £1 coin so piled small change under the eldests pillow (8) and he woke up.

The tooth fair never really figured in the childhood magic.

Father Christmas did in a BIG way, but the eldest and I have had a chat, he worked out that the chances of FC and me having the same stickers for the gifts was remote... he's now part of the 'magic conjuring' team as my youngest is only 4 and a full believer. When he twigs, we'll just be a household of magic conjurers and won't do anything differently except believe its real!

I still will put £1 under the pillows, say its the toothfairy and get groans... (DH just lost a tooth, he got £1 too and he's 46 and certainly not a believer).

MrsKeithRichards · 24/09/2012 15:34

It's not that much effort. Tooth falls out, they put it under pillow you take tooth and quick a quid under. Jobs a good un!

Original poster
Livingupatree · 24/09/2012 15:47

Yes probably not much effort, but still takes a bit of reinforcing the lie. I'm just not sure I see reason to start it in the first place iyswim?

Happy to give them the money, just as I'm happy to give Easter eggs without expecting them to believe a bunny delivers them!

OP posts:
gallicgirl · 24/09/2012 15:50

I think it's a but creepy to be honest. Why does the tooth fairy want all those teeth anyway?

LeMousquetaireAnonyme · 24/09/2012 15:58

He probably knows already about "the tooth fairy" and will be disappointed because at 5.5 I guess he is not the 1st one in his class to lose a tooth. At the 1st sign of wobbly tooth he will get all excited.
That is what happen to me, before I had a thought about doing it or not.

HmmThinkingAboutIt · 24/09/2012 15:59

The tooth fairy came in my house until I cried my eyes out that I didn't want the tooth fairy to come and I wanted to keep my teeth. The tooth fairy was then magically 'murdered' and my teeth reappeared.

My mum didn't try and pretend again after that.

I think the moral of the story, is that the tooth fairy doesn't suit everyone.

I was more interested in keeping my teeth as a 'trophy' in a little box. I still have them somewhere.

Now Father Christmas on the other hand...

DorisIsWaiting · 24/09/2012 15:59

Bit sad that you can't put a bit of effort in.

DD1 is 7 and still loves the idea of the tooth fairy, they have so little chance of an imaginative childhood as it is already with t'internet and an overly sexulised world. I think it's lovely. I'm not going to lie to her if she asks outright but I will ask her to keep the magic for her younger sisters.

halcyondays · 24/09/2012 16:01

Yabu. I used to love the Tooth Fairy. She used to leave in a coin in an envelope with little pictures on it. It's not that hard, is it and dc love it.

thebeesnees79 · 24/09/2012 16:02

aww that's mean!
I just leave my son £1, I wouldn't do break the bank amounts. He's lost two teeth so far (he is only 5) & was so excited to find his £1 in the morning

Sassybeast · 24/09/2012 16:04

Exs parents adopted the 'can't be arsed with all that sentimental twaddle' approach. Only a small part of the reason why, as an adult, he felt that his childhood was pretty grim. But still significant to him, when he was the odd one out. I don't understand why it's so hard to make some special memories for your kids ?

Flojo1979 · 24/09/2012 16:07

YABU, fair enough if u didn't do father Xmas etc but as u do then YABU! It's not exactly hard work is it! It's not like messing about buying a Xmas tree and decorating it and spending wks buying Xmas presents and wrapping them etc.
It's swap a tooth for a quid or whatever the tooth fairy has in change!
My DS 7 yo loves the magic of it all.
Plenty of time to grow up and learn the truth, but for now, enjoy the magic and wonder in their eyes.

Unacceptable · 24/09/2012 16:10

My DC always got a shiny coin and a little note from the tooth fairy for the first tooth they lost and I love playing tooth fairy...am ridiculously proud of being able to write so small that they got a note the size of a stamp and use a magnifying glass to read it. Mind you I do get carried away with these things and it's not for everyone.

As children we believed in and had visits from the tooth fairy, our cousins didn't-don't think they've been harmed by it in the slightest

Original poster
Livingupatree · 24/09/2012 16:14

Bit harsh to suggest that no tooth fairy will equal 'grim childhood'!

I'll end up doing it, like lemous said, he already knows about the tooth fairy from various sources, I suspect it would take more effort to not bother iyswim.

OP posts:
lovesmellingthecoffee · 24/09/2012 16:16

IMO the excitement of the Tooth Fairy bringing cash in exchange for teeth is a diversion for the fact that losing a tooth can involve pain and blood and in fact is not a nice process for a small child. looking forward to the tooth fairy visiting can make a child overlook the downside of losing a tooth.

HeathRobinson · 24/09/2012 16:17

Aww, it's sweet and fun. My eldest used to write to the Tooth Fairy and I did a teeny letter back. Not much effort, but really pleased her.

TantrumsAndGoldAndOrange · 24/09/2012 16:22

Well if he already knows about the tooth fairy from school etc it's going to take more effort not to do it, isn't it?
I mean you'll have to explain in a way a 5 year old understands that the tooth fairy is not real, he won't get any money his pillow like everyone else does and by the way could he not mention this to anyone else cos all his classmates thinks its real.

It's a pound coin under his pillow every now and then, how much of an effort do you think that requires?

Tanith · 24/09/2012 16:27

I remember my very mercenary brother levering out a slightly wobbly tooth with a spoon, blood pouring out of his mouth, so he'd get 10p off the tooth fairy when his pocket money had run out Shock

BeauNeidel · 24/09/2012 16:29

I posted about the tooth fairy in Chat the other day as DSS (11) had lost his first tooth at our house and was mulling over tooth fairy things.

His mother gives him £5 PER FLIPPING TOOTH! Shock

We didn't give him anything in the end, we did talk about proper mouth hygiene as he has a habit of not brushing his teeth - I told him to take it home and put it in a bowl on coke and it will dissolve. He asked if it would be the same with adult teeth, and I had to (again) tell him the reason brushing is so important is that he won't get another set after this!

I would do it though. It's nice to keep the innocence going. Not when they're in secondary though! Grin

FunnysInLaJardin · 24/09/2012 16:30

Don't be a meanie, when else in life do you get to truly believe in stuff like this if not during childhood. Just make sure that your tooth fairy is better organised than your parents one

thebeesnees79 · 24/09/2012 16:30

tanith that made me laugh out loud sorry. I could just imagine some kids being desperate for the money :)

DaveMccave · 24/09/2012 16:37

I have already told DD (also 5.5 and hasn't lost a tooth yet) that there is no such thing as fairies, although she says she doesn't believe me. I will give her a quid when her teeth fall out, but I will not lie to her about fairies. She asked me when she was 2, about FC, and I said he was just a nice story and not real. I still take her to grotto's and give her a stocking, we can still enjoy things without lies. I think it's unfair to suggest that not lying to your children is giving them a grim childhood. Your giving them your trust and the truth, it's hardly neglect.

thebeesnees79 · 24/09/2012 16:41

Aww Dave that's sad to not have anything magical to believe in, true or not.
I am atheist but I would never dream of telling my kids that Jesus is all made up lies. Its up to them to choose the same as no longer believing in father Christmas or the tooth fairy etc. Its just all fun.

FrozenNorthPole · 24/09/2012 16:42

YANBU. We won't (but also won't do FC or Easter Bunny for religious reasons). There is plenty of warmth, excitement and magic in my children's lives (Hmm at 'grim') without them ...

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